Flowers for Lucy
by MarilynnRae
Summary: Gillian takes in a foster child who has a history of severe abuse. The story of the way one child changes everyone's life and teaches them just how important they are to each other as well as the little girl named Lucy.
1. A Chance

_**This is a concept that has been on my mind for a while and I thought I would run with it. Let me know what you think!**_

"_She has a history of severe abuse. Parents were druggies who slapped each other around almost as much as they slapped her around. She's very quiet but extremely bright. Look, Gillian, I wouldn't be asking you to foster this girl if I thought she stood a chance anywhere else. She needs help and I think you're the only person that can help her."_

_Gillian just stared at her old friend that stood in her doorway. "Carrie, Alec and I aren't even together anymore…"_

_But Carrie shook her head. "I didn't set up custody for you _and _Alec. Just you. Lucy needs you."_

Gillian looked at the dark haired child that sat across from her at her breakfast table. Her eyes were down, staring at her cereal as she took bite after bite, almost as though she was afraid it would be taken away.

"Lucy, you don't have to eat so fast," she told the child lightly, but the girl immediately flinched at the sound of her voice, dropping the spoon and pulling her hands away.

Slowly the girl glanced up at Gillian, searching her face before slowly reaching for the spoon again. She ate slower this time, but kept glancing up at Gillian to be sure she wasn't going to hurt or yell at her.

It had been three weeks and the girl barely spoke more than a handful of words to her. She preferred to do everything herself, often waking up before Gillian and getting dressed. She was caught more than once stealing food from other kids' lunch boxes. Each time Gillian would calmly explain to the teacher that Lucy has gone through a lot and is in a transition period. This still didn't make anyone at the school like her any better.

It pained Gillian to watch this child guard herself like an animal. Her eyes were always down unless she was studying your reaction to know if she was safe. The way her arms were always crossed or twisted in front of her, it was a silent way of shutting others out. All Gillian could do was try.

Lucy attended counseling three times a week for an hour. She refused to open up to anybody.

Due to teacher's meetings, Lucy didn't have school that day and Gillian thought it best to bring her to the office since a babysitter didn't quite feel right.

She had never been before, and Gillian had taken a lot of time off to adjust to the change. It took Gillian by surprise when the six year old clung tightly to Gillian's hand and hid partly behind her as they moved through the doors of the Lightman Firm.

Thankfully, no one addressed the child, most likely seeing the fearful expression on her face and not wanting to upset her more. Lucy clung to her guardian's hand and curiously scanned every person and office.

Gillian nodded at receptionist and leaned toward her charge. "That's Heidi, she's very nice."

Much to Gillian's surprise, she actually received a nod of acknowledgement from Lucy who looked up and met Gillian's eyes patiently. It was the most content she had ever seemed, even through her nerves she seemed to actually be putting a small amount of trust in Gillian.

There was a small smile that broke through Gillian's lips as she recognized the moment of trust, it felt like a break through. Her hand squeezed the little girl's gently and guided her into her office.

Lucy slowly let go of Gillian's hand, but only after the door had been completely shut. She took a seat at her desk and watched as the girl stood only a few feet from the door, taking in all the unique aspects of the new territory.

There was a vase of flowers on the shelf that caught Lucy's eye. She took a step closer, but stopped and glanced at Gillian.

A smile took over Gillian's lips. "You can look and touch. I'm sure there is nothing you could harm," she assured her.

Lucy studied her a bit longer before deciding to take Gillian at her word and move toward the flowers. She touched them gently, running her fingers across the soft pedals. Slowly she opened her mouth as though she was going to say something and Gillian leaned in anxiously to hear. As Lucy turned toward her the door to Gillian's office swung open making both of them jump.

"Oi, Foster." Cal walked into her office tearing her anxious eyes off of Lucy who suddenly was back to her slightly terrified disposition as she moved to hide behind Gillian. Cal noticed the slight disappointment on her face and tilted his head. "Expecting someone else?"

Confusion took over her eyes next and she shook her head. "Not at all, just letting Lucy get acquainted to my office." Gently placing a hand on Lucy's back, she brought her out from her hiding place. "Lucy, this is my friend and business partner, Doctor Cal Lightman. Can you tell him hi?"

She knew it was a bold move, but she wanted to try. Lucy only looked between the two adults and then clung to Gillian's hand again.

She sighed, but gently stroked the girl's hair. The poor thing was so skittish of people and Cal could intimidate the best of them. Still, as Cal looked down at the little girl his disposition changed to a much gentler and calm, opposed to his rough and radical normality. Gillian watched as Lucy studied him.

"Hello, Lucy." Cal could easily read the discomfort on her little face as she looked at Gillian for reassurance. Gillian responded with a gentle encouraging squeeze as she continued to stroke the girls hair. "I swear I don't bite. Gillian here is my friend too."

Cal had heard all about the difficult times she had be having with Lucy. The first night where she didn't want to be touched or look up from the ground and how she slept on a blanket between her bed and the wall. The first time Gillian tried to brush her hair and she flinched every Gillian moved the brush, assuming she was going to get hit with it. The night that Alec came over uninvited and Lucy became so anxious she got sick.

But with the bad came the good. The first time Lucy let Gillian touch her without flinching. The first time she spoke, a full week after she came and only it was only "Cheerios" when given the option of breakfast cereals at the store. The very first time Lucy took Gillian's hand when she was nervous or scared. They were milestones throughout the two weeks.

Lucy slowly glanced at Gillian again who gave her a nod and a smile. Her face relaxed a little and she may have not spoke, but she did wave.

Both adults took this as a pretty large step, but decided to not push her more. Cal leaned against her desk as Lucy went back to exploring her office.

"Why don't you bring her over for dinner tonight? She may like Emily," he tried as they both watched the little girl examine everything very closely.

Gillian sighed and picked up the stack of files and papers on her desk. "I don't know, Cal. She's just now getting comfortable at my place. I just came by the office so I could get some work done at home."

Of course she missed both Cal and Emily and she truly did want to spend some time with them, but her focus had to be on Lucy right now. Then again, Cal did have a point. Emily would most likely be really good with Lucy and Lucy would probably enjoy her company.

Taking a deep breath Gillian looked back at Cal. "Why don't you come over to my place?" she offered before she realized what she was saying. "You can either help me cook or bring takeout. Either way, I wouldn't mind having you both around."

Cal smirked. "That's my girl. Emily startin' to wonder if she'd see ya before we head off to Mexico."

Gillian suddenly became alarmed. Had she lost track of time that much? "That trips not for-"

"Relax, love. It's not for another month."

Cal watched as Gillian relaxed a little. Poor thing was more stressed than he had ever seen her. She was not even legally divorced and recently took on raising a child by herself. She needed a break. He was worried for her.

"You holdin' up alright?" he asked her finally.

She didn't take her eyes off of Lucy as she took a deep breath. "She's the best thing that's ever happened to me, but this is still new. I just hope she's happy."

Cal turned toward the little girl as she reached out and picked up a brightly colored children's book Gillian kept in her office for when she had to interview children. Lucy then glanced up at Gillian and held the book out wanting her to read it.

"I think," Cal said softly as Lucy moved closer, "she's happier than she knows how to be."

Lucy handed the book _If You Give a Mouse a Cookie _over to Gillian and wrapped her arms around one of Gillian's.

"We'll read this when we get home, alright?" she told the little girl who nodded but kept holding onto Gillian's arm even as she stood and exchanged a friendly peck goodbye to Cal. "Call if you need anything, otherwise I guess I'll see you around seven tonight?" The part posed as a question because she wasn't sure what time would work for him.

"Seven it is."

Cal watched as Gillian and Lucy walked back out of the office and toward the door. If anyone could help that child it would be Gillian and if anyone could help Gillian, it would be that child. They needed each other. As much as Gillian needed someone to care about, Lucy needed someone to care about her.

Gillian was thankful that Cal didn't feel the need for their usual banter this morning mostly because he wasn't sure how Lucy would interpret it. Emily was often a little nervous when she and Cal really got into it, but they were both strong personalities with strong beliefs who sometimes stepped on each other's toes. Still, she was more than happy to have a relax conversation with him and watch him reach out to Lucy.

As she and Lucy entered the elevator with the book in her hands, Lucy looked up at Gillian. "Gillian?"

She nearly jumped at the sound of the little voice, after all she heard it so rarely. "Yes?"

"I do like it with you, Gillian."

Lucy's big blue eyes studied Gillian as she fought back tears. Such a bright child with such a big heart even with her coming from such a dark place. Gillian kneeled down to eye level and looked at the little girl.

"I really like that you're here with me."

Then, to both of their surprise, Lucy wrapped her arms around Gillian's neck and for the first time hugged her tightly, even allowing Gillian to pick her up and carry her. In one morning Lucy had spoken more to Gillian in five minutes than in the entire three weeks before.

All Gillian wanted was a family, and though she was weeks away from being legally divorced, she never felt so close to having one.

_**I hope you enjoyed! Please review! :)**_


	2. Frame It

Lucy sat at the kitchen table drawing, something that Gillian realized she had a very keen talent for. Gillian always provided her with as much drawing material as she would like. Paper, markers, crayons, colored pencils, anything she could need was in Lucy's very own drawer in Gillian's desk.

She could always tell by Lucy's artwork what kind of day she was having.

She picked up the paper and beamed, presenting her work proudly. Gillian knelt down and examined the hand drawn image. There were two people, one a little girl and one a grown woman, standing together holding hands. Around them were carefully drawn lilies, like the ones she had seen earlier in the vase in her office.

A smile spread over Gillian's face. "Is that you?" she asked pointing to the little person in the picture.

Lucy nodded happily. Then she pointed to the taller person and then at Gillian. "That's me?" Gillian clarified and Lucy nodded again. "Why don't you sign it right…" she pointed to the bottom corner of the page, "there and I'll hang it on the fridge until I can frame it?"

Lucy's eyes grew really big. "Frame it?" she asked, the excitement was hidden with her shyness, but Gillian still heard it. Of course she couldn't help but smile at it.

Gillian nodded. "Yes, and we'll hang it where ever you like."

The smile on Lucy's face was a comfort as she picked out a magnet from the fridge and held it up for Gillian to use with the picture. The sparkle in her eye was obvious as she took a step back to admire it's temporary placement.

It was hard to image why anyone would harm a child, especially Lucy. She was always so willing to watch and learn. The light in her eyes was still there, even with everything that happened to her. She was scared, broken too, but she was still a beautiful and sweet child who was amazingly bright.

Usually, the later it became, the less jumpy Lucy was. She would gradually accept that she wasn't going to be hurt by Gillian, but it was almost like it was a system that restarted every day. Still, the longer she was with Gillian, the less time it took for her to warm up. Gillian continued preparing the food as Lucy sat down and drew another picture.

"Gillian?" she asked softly as she continued drawing.

"Yes?" She couldn't hide her smile. The girl was starting to openly speak with her and even look her in the eye. It had been a revolutionary day to say the least and it made Gillian unbelievably happy.

"Cal is nice, right?" she asked nervously, not looking up at Gillian simply because she was embarrassed she had to ask the question.

Her tone concerned Gillian. She looked back at Lucy who was still drawing, trying to pretend that she busy. Gillian took a seat next to the little girl and gently touched her shoulder. To her pleasant surprise, she didn't flinch away.

"Lucy, Cal is a very nice person, and as long as you're with me, you're safe." Slowly, Lucy looked up and met Gillian's eyes. Gillian gently cupped Lucy's face, once again pleased she didn't flinch away. "You're safe, Cal won't let anything happen to you either."

Lucy nodded at Gillian. "You promise?"

"Promise."

Just then the doorbell rang and Lucy looked nervously at her guardian. She always was nervous when someone arrived at the door, but for once she didn't hang back. Instead, she held Gillian's hand and moved toward the door with her.

She clung to her leg as Gillian pulled the door open to reveal Cal holding a big brown bag and Emily standing just beside him. He didn't wait for an invitation, just moved past her as though he lived there. She had only moved out of the house that she shared with Alec a month ago and Cal was already wanting to make himself at home in her new place, even though this was his first time over.

He then looked down at Lucy who was watching him curiously as he opened the freezer and shoved the brown bag in. "You like ice cream?" he asked almost aggressively. Aggressive was just his nature, but Lucy didn't falter. She nodded and smiled a little bit. Apparently she didn't see Cal's aggressive and upfront demeanor as dangerous, instead comical. That was probably because Gillian had given her word that Cal was good.

He gave her a big smile. "Good. 'Cause Gillian loves chocolate. I brought chocolate, rocky road and vanilla, just in case. Sound good for dessert?" Another nod.

Emily patiently followed Gillian into the kitchen and gave the little girl a smile. "Hi, I'm Emily," she told her.

Lucy looked past her to Gillian almost to ask if Emily was good too. Gillian gave a gentle smile and Lucy waved before moving right back over to her guardian, the person she trusted most in the room, and maybe the world. Emily tried to get some conversation out of the child throughout the night, but failed. The only responses she or Cal were given were nods, shaking her head, or hand motions.

Eventually, Emily accepted that this was a work in progress. Lucy stayed near Gillian the entire night, watching the other two like they were completely new creatures to her. It was simple curiosity and she was very intrigued by them, but you could tell she wasn't sure what to expect from them either.

Cal dished out desserts and all four of them sat on Gillian's couch. Lucy was one side next to Gillian, then Cal and Emily. They watched an old Disney movie, mostly for Lucy's benefit, but none of them minded seeing Aladdin again.

By ten o'clock the movie was nearly over. Lucy had fallen asleep and was curled into Gillian while Emily was wide eyed and watching the movie as though she had never seen it before. Gillian felt just as tired as Lucy and had her head on Cal's shoulder and his arm around her. It was comfortable and not the slightest bit awkward.

They were best friends. They knew where they stood with each other and sometimes their friendship meant holding the other person on the couch. Usually it was because something had happened, but now it was just a comfort. There were no spouses to complain about their relationship with each other and Emily had a strange grasp on it, even though she wished they would be something more.

Deep down, Gillian knew that Cal wanted "the line" they had drawn with each other to be gone and somewhere, she did too. But what she and Cal had already didn't seem like it was worth the risk if things didn't work out. They were best friends and business partners, plus she wasn't even technically divorced yet. If a romantic relationship failed, she could lose it all. Emily could be caught in the cross fire and now Lucy too.

Still, it was sometimes hard to remember that as she drifted to sleep laying against him on her couch.

"My arms asleep, love," Cal told her gently as he shook her awake, careful not to disturb Lucy in the process.

She blinked several times before looking up at him. "Hmm?"

His smile made her melt. "My arm, love. It's asleep and Emily and I have to get home."

"Oh!" She sat up quickly, but then adjusted, realizing that Lucy was now using most of her body as a pillow.

He chuckled softly as Emily yawned. "Dinner was great, Gillian," Emily told her, leaning down and giving her a hug and a kiss.

She returned it and smiled. "Thanks. Lucy likes you, Em. Trust me, she wouldn't have even looked at you otherwise."

Emily gave her a weak smile and nodded. "Maybe next time she'll actually talk to me."

With the progress she made today, there may be a chance of that. "Maybe."

Cal leaned down and shared a friendly peck and embrace, both of them careful to not disturb Lucy. As he pulled away, Cal looked down and gently pushed Lucy's hair off her face before going back and meeting Gillian's eyes. There was a silent conversation that unraveled between them, just comfort.

"Need somethin' call," he told her before turning back to Emily and guiding her to the door. Gillian gently moved out from under Lucy and followed behind them.

"Cal?" She placed a hand on his arm to stop him. "I wanted to talk to you about something, actually."

Emily stops with him until he offers her the keys. "Go start the car, love, be out in a sec."

The girl obeyed without question, leaving the two adults to talk. Cal turned his full attention toward her as they stood in the dimly lit house together. Gillian glanced back at the couch where her charge was sleeping soundly before meeting his eyes.

"I just wanted to see if it was alright with you if I put you down as Lucy's secondary emergency contact for school and such," Gillian explained, her voice a slightly higher pitch due to nerves, but she didn't know why. "I mean. My brothers don't live around here and she needs someone to…"

"Course, love. Anything you need," he assured her, his hand gently stroking her bicep.

There was a moment where Cal just wanted to walk back toward the couch and hold her until she realized she didn't have to carry this weight alone, that he was there for her one hundred percent, but he knew better. Gillian was fiercely independent and she refused to fail. Not that there was a chance at her failing in something that came so naturally to her.

Gillian moved toward him and let him wrap his arms around her small frame as rested her head against his shoulder. "She likes you," she told him as she nearly clung to him. At the current moment, he was her strength in this emotional storm. She was always his angel.

"She's a good kid."

Finally Gillian stepped away from him and looked into his eyes. For a split second she almost leaned in to kiss him. Kiss him properly, but she couldn't. Their relationship was the way it was for a reason and no matter how sweet, charming, or loving he could be, she had to weigh all the factors before putting all her chips in.

Cal felt the sudden urge as well, but respected Gillian's withdraw, as always. She wasn't even divorced yet and all he wanted was a chance, a chance to make her understand that this could very well be the very best thing that had ever happened to them.

"Goodnight, Cal," she told him as she leaned against the open door frame.

He nodded. "Goodnight, Gillian."

With that, another chance was ruined. Gillian locked the door behind him and Cal climbed into his car with Emily. Lucy was curled into a ball on the couch. Slowly, Gillian moved to scoop her up and carry her into her bedroom.

Lucy wrapped her arms around Gillian's neck and clung tightly to her as they moved up the steps.

"Did Cal and Emily leave?" she asked sleepily as Gillian pushed the bedroom door open. She laid the tiny girl on the bed while she searched through the drawers to find something for her to sleep in.

"Yes. They were tired too," Gill helped the little girl out of her day clothes and into her pajamas. Lucy was too sleepy to complain that she didn't get to say bye. Instead, she just allowed her guardian to pull the blankets over her and drift closer to sleep.

Gillian pushed Lucy's dark curls off her face and gently kissed her cheek. This day had been one for the books. She was finally opening up. She was finally allowing herself to find comfort in Gillian.

"Goodnight, Lucy."

She flipped off the lights in the bedroom and left the door cracked. To be honest, she didn't consider herself a woman of God, even though she was raised to be, but after today she couldn't help but look up and thank Him. Lucy was learning how to be happy.

Cal and Emily drove toward their home in a near silence, the radio barely humming in for white noise. "Dad?" Emily said suddenly, jerking Cal from his train of thought.

"Yes, love?"

"I think we should invite Gillian and Lucy to go to Mexico with us."

This definitely took Cal by surprise as he glanced at his daughter. "Emily…"

She gave him a hard look. "Just think about it, Dad. It could be good for them."

Gillian was nearly asleep when she heard the sound of footsteps in the hallway. Immediately she reached over and turned on the lamp on the side of her bed just in time to see the door to her bedroom be crack open.

Lucy stood there in her PJ's and her favorite blanket dragging the floor behind her. Her cheeks were tear stained and she was shaking slightly. In half a second, Gillian was over to her, kneeling in front of her.

"Sweetie, what's wrong? Did you have a bad dream?" Gillian asked, but the little girl just shook her head.

"I got scared…" she whispered softly. "I don't want to leave Gillian. I want you to be my new mommy…"

If it was possible, Gillian's heart swelled and broke all at the same time. The reminder that this could be temporary killed her. There was no way Gillian was letting this precious child go back to her the place where she was not treated like the miracle she was. So she made a promise that she guarantee she could keep. Something that she tried to never do.

"I will never leave you," she swore.

Lucy looked up at Gillian. "I want to stay with you." She threw herself into Gillian's arms. "Forever and ever."

Tears pricked at Gillian's eyes. "I want you to too, baby."

The little girl pulled back and looked down between them. "Does that mean I could sleep in your bed? There's something scary in my closet, Gillian."

It was impossible to hide her smile as Gillian picked the little girl up and rubbed their noses together. "Absolutely. Tomorrow you and I can check your closet and get whatever is scary out."

Lucy climbed under the covers in the big queen size bed, before looking back at Gillian. "Will Cal help us? He's strong! He can take care of the monsters! And Emily can help me draw some more? They'll come back right?"

This time, Gillian's heart just swelled. "I bet if we ask them really nicely, they'll come back. Maybe even have dinner with us again tomorrow."

Lucy beamed as Gillian crawled back into bed and reached over and turned off the light. It was silent for a long time before the little voice spoke again.

"Gillian?" it said in the darkness.

"Yes, Lucy?"

There was a slight hesitation before the reply. "I love you, Gillian."

Suddenly Gillian was very glad the lights were off. The first tear slid down her cheek onto her pillow. This was motherhood. "I love you too, Lucy."

_**What do you guys think? Reviews equal love! **_


	3. Bullies

_**Chapter 3! I love-love-love the reviews! Thank you so much and I hope you keep reading!**_

Three weeks had passed since Lucy crawled into Gillian's bed. It was the first day that really showed change in Lucy and now she was acting almost like a normal child. Emily had started stopping by Lucy's school on her way to the Lightman Group. As much as Gillian appreciated it, she almost worried that would eventually annoy the teenager who had a social life. She may have not minded even enjoyed doing it now, but sooner or later it was going to start seeming too much like a responsibility.

Still, Gillian was always sure to pass the girl at least a twenty on the last day of the week. It was there little secret since Cal insisted that Emily didn't need to be paid to help out because he never paid Gillian for helping out with Emily. He didn't quite see the difference.

Gillian had lost track of time dealing with a case involving a cult, not to mention remember that she did indeed break the law today and put her guardianship at risk if Loker decided to not help cover her ass (not to mention Cal was helping Zoe on a case and this always made for a bad week), so she was pleasantly surprised when Lucy came walking in and dropped her backpack next to her desk before throwing her arms around Gillian.

"Today was _so_ much fun!" Lucy told her as she climbed into her guardian's lap. Her smile was impossibly large as she smiled real big up at her. Emily must have went ahead and headed home. "We painted in art class, and my teacher said I was really good, Mommy!"

Mommy.

Gillian caught it, but wasn't sure if Lucy did as she immediately kept going with her story. That was something that Gillian had never been called. Sophie was too young to even think about calling her that and… Well then again, Lucy may have not meant to say it. It may have just slipped out.

"… But when we had recess, I got the best swing! I did just like you told me, Mommy. I kicked really hard and I did it all by myself!"

There is was again. She had meant to say it. The girl had been with her for over a month now and she was really accepting the fact that she may never leave. She hoped she would be in Gillian's care forever. She wanted Gillian to be her Mommy.

"Oo! Oo! And look!" Lucy touched one of her front teeth with her tongue and wiggled it. "My tooth is loose! My tooth is loose!"

Gillian smiled at her. "Oh my goodness! That means the Tooth Fairy will have to come visit you!"

Lucy's eyes got real big. "Really? Emily said that she didn't lose her first tooth til she was seven! She made me feel better because everyone else in my class has lost one already."

As usual, Gillian's affection for Cal's daughter only increased as she beamed at the little girl in her school uniform. Then sudden the little girl looked a bit sad. "Will you promise not to get mad? I swear it was an accident."

Lucy slowly climbed off Gillian's lap and stood in front of her. She no longer moved more than arms distance away, sure the Gill would never hurt her like people have in the past. Still, she wouldn't quite look her in the eye.

Gillian leaned forward and lifted Lucy's chin with a soft finger. The big blue eyes the girl had looked nervous as she search the other woman's expression. "Honey, I won't be mad if it's an accident."

Still, Lucy hesitated before taking a step back and revealing her tights were torn at the knees and she had Band-Aids over both kneecaps. The one on the right knee was twice the size of the one on the left. "I was running and I fell… I'm sorry about my tights…"

Gillian frowned, but not because she was upset with the child but because it looked like it probably hurt. "I'm not worried about the tights. Do your knees still hurt?"

The little girl nodded sadly.

Gillian scooped up the child and gave her a big smile. "Then lets got get Cal's first aid kit and see if we can make them feel a little better."

Torres and Loker both watched as Gillian carried the little girl out of her office. She was so smiley when Lucy was around it was amazing. After the horrid day today had been, just seeing Lucy had completely turned her mood around.

The smile she wore didn't had hints of sadness or exhaustion from the rough week, it was just a blissful gleam that was almost contagious.

The first couple times Lucy came in, she stuck close to Gillian, eventually moving to wear she stuck just as closely to Cal. By the second week, she was running around passing on her giddy giggles and goofy grins to everyone. Heidi was the first to point out that she nearly had Gillian's personality. When someone looked sad, she saw it and wanted to help. When they were angry, she knew to refrain. All she wanted to do was help.

One time Loker had be particularly frustrated at Cal and Lucy placed one of Gillian's pudding cups on the side of his desk. He looked up at her and gave her funny look as she slowly pushed it toward him. Gillian had seen the interaction and was standing in the doorway watching as the girl tried to make a new friend.

Immediately Loker was sold and it wasn't because of the pudding cup.

Gillian let herself into Cal's office and set Lucy down on one of the chairs. Cal came in just as she was opening one of her desk drawers.

"Oi, I take no responsibility for any kinda magazines you find in there," he teased making her raise an eyebrow at him as she pulled out the white first aid kit. He then gave her a once over. "Who's hurt?"

Lucy raised her hand and Cal moved toward her, noticing the bandages on her knees. "I fell on the playground."

Cal gave her a look. That was a half lie. "Really?" he asked earning another look from Gillian. She walked around the desk and also studied Lucy's expression.

"Well… Actually Josh Mason knocked me down but it was an accident." There was a half shrug showing that she didn't believe it was an accident even if the boy had told her it was.

Cal frowned and took a seat next to Lucy on the couch as Gillian gently started to removed the bandages. "Do I need to come to the playground and tell this Josh Mason that no one messes with _my _Lucy?"

Lucy shook her head, her eyes wide in horror. "Oh no, Cal. No, no, no! They think I'm weird because I only gots a mommy, we can't let them know you talk funny!"

Despite the slight sadness in the first part of her sentence, the last bit had Gillian throwing a hand over her mouth to try and keep herself from outright laughing. She looked up at Cal who took feign offense to the statement before going back and taking care of her left knee. Her left knee there was only a couple scrapes, but she had a feeling that the right knee was not going to be pretty.

"Oi, I talk funny do I? How do I talk?"

Lucy scrunched her nose and thought for a moment. "You talk like Nigel Thornberry! Eliza's dad!"

And the laughter from Gillian started all over, this time twice as hard. After applying the antibiotic ointment, she placed a fresh bandage over her left knee and gently removed the one on her right. The blood had made the bandage stick to the wound and by the way Lucy flinched she knew this one was not going to be as easy to look past.

"Well," Cal went on, trying to distract her from the pain in her knee. "You may only have a mummy and a friend that talks like _Nigel Thornberry_, but I bet I can teach you how to make that boy stop being mean." Lucy opened her mouth but Cal held up a finger. "Even if he just did it on accident."

Lucy flinched against as Gillian applied ointment to the much larger gash across her knee. It was probably going to scar, but little girl got scars from play grounds. It would probably the only on that Gillian would be able to look at without getting ungodly angry.

"How?" she asked him, her eyes wide.

"First, you stand up," he jumped up and motioned for Lucy to do so when Gillian finally put on the new bandage. She jumped up next to him and mocked his stance. "We're gunna pretend that Gillian here is John Mason, alright?"

Lucy gave Gillian a look but then nodded at Cal. "His name is Josh though."

Cal waved her off as though his name was not important.

"Okay, you stand up and then you walk up to Josh Mason at recess." Cal took a few steps closer to Gillian as she watched him with unhidden humor. Lucy followed Cal up and stood nearby, watching as Cal gave Gillian a fake glare. "You look at him and you say," he glanced down at Lucy, "repeat after me al'ight?" Lucy nodded. "You say, 'Oi! Jonah Markson-'"

Lucy giggled. "Cal," she drug out. "His name is Josh Mason!"

He leaned down over her and poked her in the belly. "Are you going to repeat after me or what?"

She giggled again and nodded. Cal straightened up and looked back at Gillian who was now doing her very best not to completely lose it. Truthfully this was absolutely the cutest thing she had ever seen.

"Alright Luce, you say, 'Oi! Josh Mason!'"

Cal glanced down at Lucy who gave her best glare at the stand in bully. "Oi, Josh Mason!"

Gillian had to cover her mouth now. The little darling sounded like an angry British kid and it was so adorable it was painful. Cal gave the girl an approving nod before looking back at Gillian who he was nose to nose with.

" If you push me down, or tug on my ponytail, or tease me anymore…"

Lucy took her cue to repeat.

"I will tell my _best _friend Cal Lightman."

Lucy repeated again, smiling up at Cal this time.

"And he will make you wish you never stepped foot…"

Lucy repeated it again and tilted her head, anticipating more.

"On my playground!"

This time she stomped her foot for extra emphasis.

"Now stick that in your juice box and shove it!"

Gillian was now laughing so hard tears were welling in her eyes and her ribs were hurting as Cal grinned at Lucy. "I guarantee he will leave you alone!"

Lucy grinned and ran up to hug Cal. He lifted her into his arms and she looked back at Gillian. "I don't need a daddy when I got Cal, right Mommy? He'll teach me the stuff that daddies are supposed to teach right?"

The question left Gillian completely shocked. Yes, Cal had become a huge part of their lives, even larger than Gillian had expected, but it was turning out to be the best thing. She didn't quite know how to answer until Cal met her eyes. They were so gentle and fatherly. Lucy was becoming a second daughter to him.

"I think Cal wouldn't mind that, would you?" she smiled at him as he put Lucy on the ground.

"Hmm…" He squinted his eyes at the little girl. "I think we can work something out."

Lucy grinned but then spun around and looked at Gillian. "Mommy, can I show Ria and Eli how I'm gunna make Josh Mason stop being mean and show them my loose tooth?"

Gillian nodded. "When you come back we'll grab an after school snack, alright?"

She barely nodded before taking off to look for her two other friends in the building. She was a truly special kid. For a split second she wondered if Lucy would have looked at Alec the same way she looked at Cal, and she had a feeling that she wouldn't. Cal was definitely special, especially to them.

A hand was placed on Gillian's arm and she turned to see Cal smiling at her. "Thank you," she told him. "Six year old bullies, I'm not sure if I know how to handle those."

He laughed and they both sat down on the couch in his office. "Tell ya what. I'll take the bullies and you can take the conversation I have to have with Emily later." Gillian raised an eyebrow at him and he immediately groaned. "Fake ID's and birth control."

Suddenly she was glad Lucy was nine years younger than Emily, more time to prepare. "She's a good kid, Cal," Gillian reminded him. "She's just a teenager."

Cal studied her for a moment. "Were you having sex when you were her age."

Gillian hesitated but then opened her mouth to answer before Cal held up his hand and stood up. "Never mind, I don't want to know the answer to that, love."

"Cal…" It was no secret he was having problems adjusting to the fact his little girl was not so little anymore. The relationship he and Emily shared was the most important thing to him and he had to understand that just because she was a teenager didn't mean she wasn't still his little girl. She was changing, but she'd always need her father.

"I know. Don't say it," Cal groaned. Gillian stood and moved toward him.

They both took a deep breath. "Wanna do dinner tonight?" she offered. It was a Friday night routine lately and it seemed to do them all good after a hard week.

Cal nodded then took a deep breath. "Emily wants you and Lucy to come to Mexico with us next week," he tossed out trying to seem casual about the offer. "So, what do you say?"

Gillian didn't hide her surprise. "You want us to come along?"

Much to Gillian's pleasure, she caught the flustered look that ran through his face. "For Emily and Lucy. It would be.. nice to have you keep me from going insane. Teenagers. Huh."

Gillian nearly laughed. Cal was hard to read, but she knew him. There line had been danced upon was beginning to really get blurred. Now that Lucy was involved she almost didn't care as long as she didn't get hurt in the process.

"What about the group?" Gillian inquired.

Cal thought for a moment. "Your right. You take the girls, I'll stay."

She threw her head back and laughed at him. "Nice try. We're both going."

Lucy came running back into the room at that second held up three pudding cups. "Snack?"

Cal shook his head but accept the snack. "Good to see your passing on your habits, Foster."

She gave him a cheeky grin. "Better mine than yours."

Lucy just sat between them, happily eating her pudding as she kicked her feet. Blue eyes no longer wide with fear, but a childlike curiosity while her long curls were tied to into pig tails. She was happy and so sure she was going to be there forever. But as many know, sometimes destiny doesn't see things the same way.

_**Do you think I should keep this a happy go lucky story or would you like a little bit of a darkness thrown into the plot? I have a few plans but I don't want to kill the joy you all are expressing. **_


	4. Insight from a Child

As much as Gillian hated to tell Cal no, she couldn't go to Mexico. It was nearly impossible to take a foster child out of the country and he understood and took it perfectly. Lucy hugged and kissed him and Emily goodbye the night before, but was still a little put out. It was Cal that behaved like a child the next morning while Gillian tried to get him out the door of the office so he didn't miss his flight. Though, that was completely expected.

Lucy sat in Gillian's office drawing five days later. She didn't know why her mother was acting all flustered but she knew it wasn't a good thing. She didn't mind her mommy working late all week, mostly because she knew that she wouldn't do it unless she had to. But who she really hated was this Jack Rader character.

"Hi Lucy," he said to her as she continued her drawing. Though she was getting better at talking to people she was introduced to, she wanted absolutely nothing to do with this man that Gill tried to introduce her to several days before.

She hunkered down a little more to her paper, barely passing him a glare. To be honest, Gillian was surprised. Ignoring was something to expect, this attitude though. That was what was somewhat out of character for Lucy. She honestly thought there wasn't a mean bone in her body, but she really did not like Rader.

Still, after he blatantly taped an interview with a reporter against everyone's wishes, Gill didn't even scold her.

"Jack just wanted to say bye, Lucy," Gillian said from the door.

Originally, Rader's plan was to woo Gillian through his charm, intelligence, and ability with children. The third one failed so miserably he wasn't sure if he could recover from it.

Lucy glared at him. "Goodbye," she snapped harshly.

Gillian turned toward Rader with an _are you finished now_ look. It was possible that he truly lost. No amount of wooing could turn a woman when her child was against him. He knew this, but he was not one to give up easily.

"Watch the interview, Gillian," he told her as he walked toward the door.

Lucy stood up and watched him through the glass. "Stay here, baby," Gill told her. "I'll be right back."

Gillian went out the door but headed in the other direction from Rader. This was excellent news for Lucy. Still, she watched him with hateful eyes as he offered Loker something. "Here's my card. In case you plan on making a life change."

Lucy's eyes narrowed as Loker took it, glancing down at it and then back up at Rader who was headed for the exit.

"Thanks man," he said shortly.

Lucy stormed out the door and over to Loker, crossing her arms like she had seen her mommy do when she was upset.

"He's not good," she told him insistently.

Loker gave her a sort of shrug. "Lucy, there's some things that little kids don't understand."

She glared at him with an intensity that surprised him. "I understand that he's bad. Mommy says that Cal doesn't like him."

Loker bent down to her level and flicked the card against her nose. "Lightman doesn't like a lot of people. That doesn't make them bad."

The little girl studied his face and for a moment he mused how much she really acted like Foster and Lightman. She cared a little too much about everyone and wanted to make sure everyone was happy, but at the same time, loyalty was key with her. She would do what she thought she had to for the end result.

"Cal does things for a reason," Lucy assured him.

Loker nearly laughed at her. "He does things cause he can."

Lucy stared at him and shook her head. "You know, I thought you were smart." Her little shoulders relaxed a little and suddenly Loker realized he was getting pitied by a six year old. She reached up and patted his arm. "I don't think I'm too little to understand. I think that you get mad when Cal bullies you. But Cal said that the bullies are the one that make us strong."

She shrugged again and moved back toward her mother's office. "Bet ya never thought about that," she sang tossing a smile over her shoulder.

It was like dealing with Foster, Lightman and Emily all rolled into a six year old body. But as Loker watched her walk away, he realized that sometimes people just can't be underestimated.

When Gillian arrived at work the next morning there were flowers waiting on her on the front desk. She smiled to herself as she reached for the card that stood out but it was snatched out of her hand before she could read it.

"Hey!" she squealed fighting for the card back when she turned around and realized it was Cal. "Hey!" Her tone was slightly different. Still accusing, but less surprised. They may have even been a greeting in there.

Cal had seen everything that happened in the office over the last week. He may have been in another country, but the security cameras were incredibly helpful. He was able to watch all of Rader's advances on Gillian, all the flirtatious looks they shared, but also his favorite ornery six year old put as much of a damper on the attempt of a flame as possible. _Good girl._

Cal opened the card and read it aloud, skillfully keeping it out of her grasp. "'Don't hate me too much because I'm filled with admiration.'"

She finally got a grip on it and through her smile he could see that she enjoyed their own game. She reached for the vase.

"Who sent the flower then? Cause you know I'm the jealous type." He waggled his eyebrows for extra effect. He loved her smile. The beautiful way it lit up her face. It was almost a child like bliss that she had, a secret that she shared with absolutely nobody.

"Welcome home, Cal," she replied warmly instead. "Rumor has it that you never even left town. But that can't be true, because you look like a different man."

She picked up the flowers and carried them toward the break room. "I feel like a different man," he told her. Their game of teasing and flirting was far from over. "So no, a vacation is a wonderful thing. Six days of nothing."

She rolled her eyes and smiled, but she made sure he didn't see. Liar. "Well, I heard you were working on a case."

"Well, it barely qualifies as a case. I feel so relaxed that, um, I don't even care that Rader was here."

Gillian raised her eyebrow at him and laughed as she added water to the vase of roses. Lie number two. "Then Torres told you."

"Well, why would she?" All Gillian did was smile in reply, so Cal kept going. "So, uh, he sent you the flowers did he?"

She kept smiling. "Yep."

"Have you checked 'em for aphids?"

She laughed. "You would have been so proud of Lucy, Cal. I was almost wondering if you didn't train her with a photo and tell her to do her very best to act just like you when he showed up."

"That's my girl," Cal mused. "I'll take her for ice cream."

Gillian smiled at him. "Wanna make her really happy? Pick her up from school today. I was asked everyday when you were coming back. Soon wasn't soon enough."

There was an urge that to lean in and kiss her right then, but he resisted. "Dinner tonight?" he offered, somehow succeeding in keeping his voice even. "Emily will be back at Zoe's but it's Friday."

She placed the flowers on the corner of her desk and tilted her head at him. "You don't want to go home and rest?"

Cal shrugged. "Not particularly. Kinda miss the rugrat anyway."

"My place or yours?" she asked.

He gave her a cheeky smile. "Yours. I just got back. Don't think I have the energy for cookin."

Gillian rolled her eyes. "Alright. We can go get Lucy together at three and then we'll cut out early. No one will know."

He took a step toward her. For some reason he was really feeling like pushing the boundaries with her. Maybe it was the way that Rader tried to steal her away. It made him realize he had no real claims on her and maybe he did want that. Maybe he wanted to look Rader in the eye and say that Gillian was his. That he couldn't have her. He couldn't touch her or send her flowers. Truth be told, he was the jealous type and he hated when someone, especially Rader, moved in on what he wanted.

"Trying to get me alone, are you?" he teased.

She turned around to expect a smile but saw so much more. His pupils dilated, his body almost too close. It was sudden and shocking but it was… "Cal," she gasped by accident. His eyes were dark and she was suddenly feeling her heart pound in her chest. What just happened?

He could see her reaction and he realized he had gone too far. It wasn't fair to corner her in her office. Suddenly he took a step back and gave her a look that was completely unreadable. "Three. We'll leave at two forty-five."

She nodded, a bit dazed about what had nearly happened. He left without another word.

"Cal!" the little girl went sprinting toward him with her backpack bouncing wildly on her shoulders. "I missed you!"

She jumped into his arms and hugged him as tight as she could. "Umph. You're goin' to squeeze the air right outta me," Cal told her as he tapped his finger to his cheek for a kiss.

She happily obliged as Cal held her there on the courtyard. A little boy with bright red hair pointed at their little girl with her curly pigtails. "Ew! Lucy kissed a boy that wasn't her daddy!"

A little blonde girl crossed her arms and looked back at the boy. "How do you know, Josh?"

Cal immediately shot a hellish look at the little boy. That was Josh Mason. The boy that pushed Lucy on the playground and made her scrape her knees. The little boy that Lucy was suppose to stand up to.

"Cause Lucy doesn't have a daddy, duh!"

Gillian set her jaw but she was the very passive one. She was all for teaching her little girl how to ignore it and be the bigger person. Now Cal on the other hand was two seconds away from personally tearing the kid's head off, being six or not.

But then, Lucy surprised them all.

She let go of Cal's neck and landed with her feet firmly on the ground. "Josh Mason!" she snapped marching right up, nose to nose with the boy. Gillian watched, already prepared to pull the recently quick tempered six year old off of a smart mouthed kid. Cal on the other hand may let Lucy get in a few good hits before moving.

"You-you dirt eating, worm sucking, meany!" she snapped in his face. Her dark curly pigtails were bouncing as she shook her head. Cal glanced at Gillian who was also struggling to hide her grin. "You pick on me one more time and I will shove rocks up your nose and tell your mommy that you went into the girls' bathroom! I can kiss Cal on the cheek because I don't have a daddy but he's like one!"

She gave the boy a push backward and Gillian struggled with herself whether or not to stop her. "You tease me one more time and I'll-I'll-" Lucy crossed her arms and stomped her foot. Cal was not even hiding his grin anymore, he was highly amused and very proud. "I'll put bugs in your lunch box. Now stick that in your juice box and drink it!"

With that, Gillian made easy strides toward the huffy six year old. "Lucy, let's go."

She accepted her mother's hand and followed close to her toward the car.

"That's the little girl who's a foster child," a mother whispered to another.

"Ah, that explains a lot," the other replied. "She's the little girl that kept taking food out of the lunch boxes. Poor thing must have a house load of issues."

Gillian stopped dead in her tracks and turned slowly toward the women. Cal saw the raw rage flash through his friend's expression, but for good reason. Immediately Cal sprang into action.

He grabbed her free hand and pulled her toward the car as she glared at the women over her shoulder. They moved toward the car but as Gillian opened the door for Lucy she stopped and looked up at her. It was then that Gillian realized that she wasn't the only one who heard the other women's conversation.

Pain was written all over her face along with embarrassment and sadness. "Oh, sweetie," Gillian cooed, brushing Lucy's tears away and letting her move into a hug.

"Why do people always say that, Mommy?" she asked.

Gillian just kept hugging her and petting her curly hair. "People don't like what they don't understand. But I love you very much."

Cal watched as Gillian comforted the hurt girl and this may have been the moment he admitted to himself that he wanted her, in a way that wasn't just friendly or sexual, but he wanted her in the way he realized he never quite wanted Zoe. He wanted to stand next to her and raise Lucy as his own. He wanted Gillian by his side and he wanted to be at hers.

He loved her.

He loved them both. Gillian was the one.

Her big blue eyes glanced up at her over the top of the Prius and suddenly he wanted to kiss her. He wanted to hold her and kiss her then tell Lucy goodnight. Emily was just a beautiful addition to the picture.

"Luce," Cal said moving over to them and kneeling down to her level. "I think some chocolate pudding and your favorite Disney movie will make things a little better."

Lucy nodded as she clung onto Gillian's neck. "I'm glad I don't go to school tomorrow."

This made even Gill smile. "Tomorrow you're all mine! Just you and me!"

Lucy looked up at Cal. "And Cal?"

Gillian smiled and looked at him too. He gave her a nod. "And Cal," she confirmed.

With one last squeeze, Lucy moved out of Gillian's arms and climbed into the back seat. Cal climbed into the driver's seat and Gillian in the passenger seat. As they drove, Gillian felt the warmth of something on her hand. It was at that moment where she looked down at saw Cal's fingers intertwined with her own. For the first time she wasn't reluctant, but instead willing. The way they were together, the two of them or with Lucy, Gillian was beginning to realize that it was special. She didn't know what she wanted, but she did know that it involved him. She took a deep breath and ran her thumb over his fingers. He gave her a classic Cal smile. Oh well. They had all weekend to figure something out.

_**More to come! Sorry about the time between updates, I'm usually better but I've had a bit of writer's block lately. Please review! If you all have any ideas your welcome to leave them on a review or PM me. I can't promise I'll use them but I like the inspiration. **_


	5. Don't Leave Me

_**Sorry for the delay, I've had a hella lot of work going on lately. Plus, nieces due any day now. Hopefully it's worth it!**_

Lucy walked between the two adults, holding each of their hands and occasionally picking up her feet so she could swing. Cal kept looking over at Gillian. Her face seemed years younger as she laughed at the little girl, occasionally pulling the little one into a hug or teasing her gently. There was no one in the world who could love her more. Lucy that is. They were meant for each other. Exactly what each other needed.

Cal watched as Lucy let go of his hand to race up the steps of Gillian's townhouse, nearly tripping on the laces she had difficulty keeping tied. She ran through the door and toward the kitchen. Cal promised her ice cream and she exactly where to get it. Gillian found Cal's hand and squeezed it. She let him pull her into his side and as they walked in the house together.

"Mommy, you want chocolate right?" Lucy called from the kitchen as Gillian shed her own coat, regrettably moving out of Cal's arms. Cal pulled off his own when Lucy came running in with the large carton of ice cream. She didn't really need her mother's answer to ice cream. Lucy knew the answer was always chocolate.

"Of course she wants chocolate," Cal replied to Gillian as he took the large carton from the little girl. Gillian snatched the little girl into her arms as Cal headed back toward the kitchen.

Gillian tickled the little girl as she pulled off her coat. Finally Lucy collapsed into her mother's arms with a satisfied sigh. "Is it gunna be like this forever?"

Gillian looked down at the mess of curls resting against her chest. "Like what, baby?"

"You and me and Cal? Are we gunna be like this forever?" Lucy's big blue eyes looked up at Gillian and suddenly she had the urge to promise that nothing would ever change, but Gillian knew better. Cal and her relationship was comfortable, but complicated. Yet lately she found herself wanting more than their slightly flirtatious banter with his protective side coming out like an angry dog at times. She wanted it to be like this forever, but she also wanted more.

"I hope so," she said instead, holding Lucy tight. She didn't realize how quickly all of it could be threatened.

Cal came back in with a single bowl that was large enough for the three of them. Lucy barely had eaten a few bites before she was asleep against Gillian's side, her small hand clutching the fabric of her shirt as Gillian leaned into Cal's side.

"You want me to carry her up to bed?" Cal offered as he noticed Gillian's eyes getting droopier as she rested her head on his chest.

"Hmm?" she asked in her near sleep. Then she shook her head. "I'll get her in a minute."

Cal smirked, knowing that in a minute, they both would be asleep. Still, he didn't move. Gillian fell asleep resting against him and Lucy against her. His arm was tingling as he gently removed himself from her grip and lifted her legs so that she could properly lay on her couch. Lucy shifted to a better position, her head moving to underneath Gillian's neck and letting out a satisfied sigh.

A man like Cal would never admit the types of feelings as he looked at the two on the couch, and he would definitely never admit leaning down kissing Lucy's forehead before looking down on Gillian for an extra second. With a gentle hand he brushed the hair away from her face before leaning down and gently taking her lips with his. Cal would never admit that he did it, just like Gillian would never admit that she was a little awake. Awake enough to gently kiss him back.

Monday came too fast and Gillian knew that it was not going to be a good day. Aside from what happened Friday afternoon, Lucy was ready to go to school. Monday was paint day and Gillian could guarantee she would have something else to add to the fridge when she got home. Not that she minded in the least.

That wasn't the bad thing, the bad thing was that Gillian had scheduled some clients that she knew Cal would not enjoy, but they had to pay the bills. They already had an argument about it once over the weekend before they both decided to put it to rest before Lucy heard them.

The way Cal was already glaring at her, she really wasn't looking forward to the rest of the day.

"Maybe if I increased you fee you could run another one of those test." Gillian sucked in a breath as the man glared at Cal. This was going to be a terrible day.

Cal moved toward the door and held it open for them. "Let me just stop ya right there. The truth's the truth."

No one was happy as the men left the room. But the yelling and fighting, she wished she could take it all back when the man barged into the lobby holding a gun to Ria's head. She could quit asking herself why she let Cal walk back there with him, trade Ria for himself, Cal always had to be the hero. That was the way he was. He needed to keep his people safe first. But at the moment she just wanted to cry, she wanted Cal.

She had done everything, broke all the rules, tried reasoning and bartering. At one point she was mentally going through what she was going to have to tell Lucy if something happened. She looked into the man's eyes and begged for Cal's life. She rarely begged for anything, but more than anything she wanted Cal to live, maybe more than she wanted to live.

The moment it was over, all she wanted to do was touch him, to feel him alive at her finger tips. But instead she let him run, she let he be alone with everything he was feeling. She couldn't stand in the office any longer. She left right after he did, not saying a word to anyone. All she wanted to do was get to Lucy, hold her, kiss her hair, be thankful for another day with her. Be thankful that someone else this little girl loves didn't leave her.

"Mommy what's wrong?" Lucy asked as Gillian hugged the little girl for an extra few seconds. Tears were burning in her eyes as she kissed Lucy's hair and forehead.

"I'm just really glad to see you, baby girl."

Lucy looked up at Gillian's flushed face and frowned in concern. She placed her small hand on her cheek and furrowed her brow. "Mommy, where's Cal?"

The tears slowly started to leak past their barriers and Gillian failed at choking them back. "Cal's home tonight."

Lucy looked even more upset. "He's not mad at us is he?"

Gillian shook her head. "He could never be mad at you, baby, but he may not be very happy with me."

Lucy's little hand found Gillian's as they began to walk toward the car. "Don't worry, Cal won't stay mad at you."

"How do you know that?" Gillian teased her lightly.

"Well, cause he loves you. That's why."

Once again, tears came too close to falling as she buckled Lucy in and climbed into the driver's seat. At that moment she was forced into reality. She sniffled but the tears came despite her greatest efforts to keep them back. She was glad that Lucy could not see her face from the back seat, she'd hate to upset her.

"I painted Cal today! Well I painted him with us, Mommy. When we got pizza! Miss Penelope said I'm good at painting, Mommy," Lucy told her happily.

"That's great, honey," Gillian managed to squeak through her tears.

All night she did her best to give Lucy her full attention and pretend it was a normal night, but she couldn't lie to herself. She was miserable. She was worried sick about Cal. After she put Lucy to bed Gillian paced the hallway between the rooms with her cell phone in her hands, debating whether or not to make that call. He'd resent her for checking on him, but she was ill, sick with worry. She wouldn't sleep until she knew that he was at least still breathing.

That's when there was a knock on her door.

She couldn't get there fast enough, not that she wanted to show him that. She took a deep breath before she opened the door.

He had been drinking, that was the first thing she noticed. His hair was a bit more of a mess than usual and he had a mix scent of a feminine perfume and alcohol that lingered on his breath and attire. A twinge in her was suddenly jealous, but the look in his eyes told her there was nothing that happened. He was still afraid of being touched.

"Hey," he said, tossing his head slightly, trying to seem unaffected and completely normal. He should have known that it was pointless to hide from her right then.

"Hey," she replied gently, already feeling like she needed to coax him toward her like a feral animal. Food and kind sounds always worked. She could help but take a relieved breath at the sight of him. It took most of her strength not to throw herself into his arms and cry again.

"Uh, Zacanelli confessed to Connie's murder so…"

Typical Cal. Talk about anything but what he needed to talk about, but she'd play along. For now. "I heard."

She took another deep breath, begging him silently to look at her. She needed to touch him. To feel him physically. That he was really there and this wasn't a dream.

He looked down, having difficulty looking at her. "I'm sorry I ran out like that."

Apologies were not Cal's strength, but she could feel the honesty in it. It was so much that she could feel herself on the verge of tears again. He protected them and was apologizing for needing to cope.

"No. Everybody's dealing with it in their own way," she assured him. "I'm just-" Gillian tried to smile but it failed quickly as the lump in her throat grew. She tried to stand straighter and control herself. "I'm just glad you're alright." Slowly she reached up to his hair line. "How's your head?"

He ducked out of her reach and hissed. "Uh, fine." It was a lie but she didn't care. He was breathing.

Suddenly he took a step toward her, invading her space. He needed to touch her too, but he was afraid. Afraid she really wouldn't be there. That it was some sort of messed up dream and he'd wake up still-

"Listen," he said quickly. "I was thinking about that whole, um," he shuffled, "accounting thing, that whole billing thing, you know. We'd be working out of a shoe box if it wasn't for you."

She didn't care about that right now, but she took the conversation lightly until he turned, as though he was leaving. Her heart wrenched as he stepped off her porch. No. She still needed to feel him.. to make sure he was alright.. Then he turned back around again.

"I really just popped back by to see.. how you were doing…"

She smiled a little at that. He was held at gun point today and he was worried about her. "I'm okay," she replied softly.

"You didn't tell Lucy-"

"No. She doesn't need to know."

Cal nodded. "Emily's at her mum's. I haven't told her yet…" Cal took a few more steps back as though he was thinking before finally looking back at Gill. "Can I sleep on your couch tonight if it's not too much of a problem?"

He had to be so polite and formal about it. "Of course."

"Ah, good," he nodded and took a step toward her. As he took his first step into the living room with Gillian still right infront of him, she reached out and touched his shoulder.

He didn't stray away this time. Instead he looked down at her as she met his eyes. "Hey." It was all she could say before suddenly it all became too much. She wrapped her arms around his neck and felt him hold her tight. His heart beat against her chest and the warmth of his body made the tears flow. He was really there. He was alright.

She couldn't live without him. She couldn't. The idea made her stomach drop and her heart stop beating. She needed Cal possibly more than she needed oxygen. Her fingers gripped his shirt as they clung to each other, never wanting to let go.

Finally, they separated, pulling away to look at each other. That's when something happened she wasn't expecting. Their eyes locked as she felt the heat rise to her cheeks. He reached up and touched her face in the gentlest way. "I'm sorry I scared ya."

Tears choked her as she went to him again, resting her head on his chest. "Cal…"

She looked up at him again. His eyes seemed even more intense than she had ever seen them. He didn't say a word, just leaned down toward her, gentle locking their lips in a kiss that was more than a friendly peck.

Her hands fisted in his shirt as she returned the kiss. She had never felt such a need to kiss someone before. It was like her body was demanding it.

Finally they separated. Cal cupped her tear stained cheek. "I'm sorry."

She shook her head and took his hand in hers. "Don't leave me."

His eyes sparked as he leaned in to gently kiss her again, but this time she had a different idea. She pushed the door shut pulled him down so she could deepen the kiss. His hands moved to her waist and pulled her flush against his body as he also pushed her against the now closed door. "Don't leave me," she whispered again as fire began to burn beneath his touch.

"Never dream of it, luv."

_**Please review!**_


	6. What's Offered

There was many things Gillian had imagine and believed would never happen, that's why when she woke up next to Cal, she had to second guess herself whether or not she was still sleeping. Her face was turned into Cal's neck and she could smell his scent. She couldn't resist leaning in and kissing his soft skin.

He smirked. "I was wondering when you'd wake up."

She moved her bare feet against the inside of his leg. Cal had his arm around her body, resting comfortably on her bare hip as she sighed into his neck. His skin felt so good against her lips that she couldn't keep herself from going back and kissing the area just below his chin.

"Gill," he groaned, loving the way she felt against him. She giggled and kept going. His grip on her his tightened as he suddenly rolled over to where she was on her back and he was on all fours above her.

He smiled hungrily down on her as she grinned back. His lips captured hers in a kiss that stole her breath as his hand moved across her bare skin.

"No! No! No!"

Cal jumped back at the sound of the Lucy screaming, a room away. Gillian was on her feet, grabbing her robe and tying it around her as she rushed to Lucy's bedroom. Cal grabbed his clothes that were strung across the room and tried to force them on quickly.

Gillian opened Lucy's bedroom to find all the covers on her bed kicked off and the little girl thrashing around. Her clothes were twisted around her body as Gillian went to her side, careful not to spook her more.

"Lucy, baby, wake up," Gillian whispered to the little girl as she took her into her arms and stroked her hair away from her face. Lucy instinctively clutched onto Gillian's arm and wiggled as close as possible.

"I want my mommy," she whimpered, still stuck in her dream. "Where's Mommy?"

Gillian gently shushed her and kissed her forehead. "I'm right here, baby."

Cal stood in the doorway, watching as Gillian gently brought the girl out of her nightmare. She was so gently and loving as Lucy cried. Her soft broken sobs slowly dying down to just whines as Gillian held her close.

"They wanted me to go with them, but I said no. I wanna stay with you, Mommy."

Lucy's dark curls were plastered to her forehead with sweat as Gillian hugged her close. "I want you to stay with me too, baby."

The blue of Lucy's eyes found Gillian's. "Forever and ever?" she asked.

"Forever and ever," Gillian replied.

Cal watched for several more minutes until Gillian lulled the small girl off to sleep with gentle tunes. Gillian just held the girl until she was sound asleep. Then she gently placed the girl back down on her pillow, still singing the same tune as she pulled the covers back around her. As she turned around, she looked honestly surprised to see Cal standing there watching her.

She didn't miss a beat with the soft song she was singing as she soft pushed him away from the door and gently closed it behind her.

"You're a natural," he told her honestly as she wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled up at him.

She laughed. "I have a doctorate in psychology, I better know how to calm a scared child."

He looked down at her, his arms wrapping around her waist. "You're a natural at being a mother. That wasn't being a psychologist, that was being a mother."

He leaned in and kissed her on the lips smiling as she sighed into him. He could get used to this.

Cal woke early the next morning, Gillian still at his side her head on his shoulder and her hand over his pounding heart. He was careful not to wake her as he escape from her bed and redressed. He needed to get home to change before heading to work. But he worried that if he just left without a note or something, she'd think this was a pointless one night stand.

Instead he leaned over her and gently took her lips with his. She smiled sleepily as her eyes cracked open. "Where are you going?" she yawned reaching up and touching his shoulders.

"Home to shower and change. I'll see you at work in a couple hours," he promised kissing her one more time. She regrettably let him go and drifted off to sleep for an extra hour or two before deciding to get up.

She stretched her hands over her head as she yawned and got to her feet. She decided to hop in the shower before going to wake up Lucy. As she entered the bedroom, Lucy was sleeping peacefully.

Gillian picked out Lucy's school uniform from her closet and laid it on her bed. It was probably best to let her sleep as long as possible due to the events of the night before. Gillian took a moment to look at the little girl that seemed at peace for the moment. Her curls framed her face easily and her dark complexion had a glow than many people would envy. She was such a beautiful little girl.

Again, Gillian reached out and touched the little face and traced the beautiful features with her index finger, smiling as Lucy wrinkled her nose. Indivertibly, Gillian woke the little one with her tactics and smiled as a big yawn escaped Lucy's lips.

Her big blue eyes fluttered open and looked up at her mother. Immediately a smile took over her kind features that Gillian couldn't help but match. "Morning, Mommy," she said sweetly sitting up and wrapping her arms around Gillian's neck. "Did Cal go home?"

It surprised Gillian that Lucy ever knew Cal was hear last night, unless she saw him when she woke up from her nightmare. "Yes he did," Gillian told her honestly. "Need help getting dressed?"

Lucy shook her head as she climbed off the bed. "Nope, I can do it, Mommy."

Gillian gave her another quick kiss on the forehead before going downstairs to get some breakfast. She grabbed her phone off the kitchen counter, how it ended up there last night she had no idea, and noticed she had two missed calls. One was within ten minutes from Cal, the other was right after that from Carrie, Lucy's social worker.

From some reason it always made Gillian's stomach drop to see Carrie's name pop up on her phone. Honestly, she was probably just calling to check up on things, but Gillian knew how these things worked. At any moment, Lucy could be ripped from her care and sent somewhere else. Carrie would do her best to keep that from happening, but it was still a general fear.

"I do okay, Mommy?" Lucy asked coming down and tripping on her untied laces, crashing into Gillian's legs. Gillian laughed as Lucy let the crash turn into a hug as she beamed up at her mommy. "I need to work on my shoe strings, can you show me again?"

"Of course." Gillian scooped Lucy up and plopped her down in one of the kitchen chairs. He took both laces and pulled them high up. "First, we cross them, then we tuck one. Then-"

"We make bunny ears!" Lucy said excitedly. "I remember that one."

A big smile took over Gillian's features. "Good job! Then they cross and one bunny ear goes into the hole and-"

"We pull!" Lucy nodded happily. Then she hopped off the chair. "I'll try this one, Mommy. Can I have Cheerios?"

Gillian nodded. "Of course."

In the end, a very frustrated Lucy finally gave in and let Gillian tie her shoes. This was probably the only thing that the little girl was noticeably behind in just because no one ever showed her before. In fact, Gillian never even realized she couldn't tie her shoes because she didn't wear tennis shoes very often. Lately they were all she was wearing because Lucy was determined to get it right.

Gillian promised herself she'd call Carrie back once she got into her office, but when Cal met her at the front door with a coffee in his hand, she couldn't help but smile. A hot blush crept to her cheeks as he noticeably looked her over in her classy grey dress that hugged her hips just right.

"Good morning," she told him, a smile that she was unable to hide revealing itself as he took a daring step toward her. She could feel that he wanted to kiss her but she attempted a sterner look. "Not here, Cal."

He pouted like a child. "It's our company, our bloody floor in this bloody parking garage."

She gave him a pointed look. "Cal, we shouldn't be flaunting our-whatever this is. Especially if we don't really know what this is."

He took another step closer to her, where her body was flush against his. "I can tell you what I want it to be," he said huskily.

Her blush deepened as her smile twitched at her lips. He knew he had won and she did too. He leaned in and gave her a quick peck on the lips before returning to a more appropriate distance. Gillian let herself smile then as his hand found her lower back and led her toward the entrance of the large building and finally the elevator.

"You know we can't be behaving like teenagers, this is our business," she told him, allowing the double meaning to do its job.

Cal just kept his small smirk. "Uh huh."

"Besides, we really haven't had the chance to really talk about it… I mean… last night."

Cal's smirk got wider as he kept staring straight ahead, just like Gillian. "Uh huh."

"So, we need to take it slow. At work. Discuss work. Not-"

Cal pulled the elevator stop button so suddenly, Gillian lost her footing. His eyes stared intensely down on her as she looked up at him. "Gill," he said sounding suddenly more serious than she had ever heard him.

Her throat felt dry and his hands held her waist. "Yes?"

"Do you want this?" he asked, the seriousness in his tone not completely hiding how timid and truly worried she would reject him. If she wouldn't have heard that tiny bit of self-consciousness in his tone, she would have rolled her eyes at him and asked him what kind of question that was. Of course she wanted this. She's wanted this for a long time, probably a longer time than she consciously realizes. Last night was one of the most intense and satisfying moment of her life and he was looking at her afraid that she was going to regret it, that she was regretting it already.

She cupped his cheek with her hand and kissed his lips. It wasn't just a peck but it wasn't all together passionate, it was tender and loving. "I want this," she promised, her lips close enough to still brush his.

He smiled at her. "Good."

They took a moment to regain their composure, both of them a bit more smiley now, before starting the elevator again.

"By the way," she said quickly, knowing she was going to forget if she didn't start talking about their actual business now. "I was looking at our budgeting." They walked into the Lightman Group together, something that was common enough that nobody thought much about it. "Expenses and overtime are two areas we should look at. And we should consider changing our company investments portfolio."

She looked over her shoulder at him to see him grinning before he placed a hand on her shoulder. There was a game he was playing, she could see it in his eyes. "You've started dating again, haven't you?" he squinted at her, his features playful. "Yeah."

She almost outright laughed. "Oh, stop it, Cal. Right now."

He pretended to think for a minute about what kind of person she would be dating. "Right. Um, stockbroker?" he offered teasingly. "Money manager?" Gillian chuckled at Cal's suggestions. "Banker?"

Torres had fallen into step behind them and was watching the way they interacted with each other. To her it was just typical Cal and Gillian.

Cal scrunched up his face and shook his head. "Oh, I thought you wanted to have some fun."

She wrinkled her nose at him in good hearted humor. "Oh, I'm having fun. Don't you worry."

A twinkle came in his eye and she quirked half a smile. "Oh, yeah?" he tossed back then immediately looked over his shoulder at their shadow before he dragged Gillian into his office and pushed all the boundaries right then and there. "Yes, Torres?"

"Uh, there's a visitor in your office. Sally Robinson from London," Torres informed him, smirking at the conversation she had just witnessed.

Cal came to an almost immediately halt. His head was down as his contemplated that and Gillian was suddenly more interested than she should have been. He spun around and looked Torres with raised eyebrows. "What?"

Gillian was a little taken back and so was Torres. "Whoa. Sally who?" she asked Torres, unable to take her eyes off of Cal's features, waiting for another hint of who this woman was.

Torres seemed more nervous than Gillian. "Uh, Robinson. High school sweetheart or something?"

Gillian's twinge of jealousy was nothing compared to her curiosity. Cal didn't answer Torres, just motioned in the opposite direction. "In my office?"

Torres smirked. "Uh-huh."

Just like that he was off, with Gillian and Torres hot on his trail. He threw open his office door and glanced around his room, searching for the mystery woman with the other two women standing in the doorway. Instead, a man jumped out from behind the corner and pointed at Cal. "Gotcha!" he exclaimed, his British accent even more define than Cal's.

The man chuckled mercilessly. Cal shook his head. "God Almighty," he mutter shaking his head.

"Yeah, but my mates still call me Terry," the man tossed back with impressive wit. The man opened his arms. "Come here."

The two men embraced like brothers, clapping each other on the back. "Sally Robinson, eh?" Terry teased, releasing Cal. "Hello. Is that a canoe in your pocket there, Cal?" He then looked over at Torres. "Nice played there, Mia."

"Ria," she corrected, handing him the coffee she was holding.

"Oh, well, thank you anyway." Terry then glanced at Gillian. "Excuse his manners. Terry Marsh," he introduced, "ex-partner in crime."

Cal squinted his eyes at him. "In a manner of speaking."

Gillian took note of the defensive tone which told her there was a lot to be said about their history. "Gillian Foster," she replied taking Terry's hand, "current partner in crime. Nice to meet you, Terry."

"You too." Cal noticed the dilated pupils as Terry grinned back at Gillian.

Cal grabbed Terry's wrist and pulled down away from Gillian's hand. Gillian felt a sort of flutter in her stomach because of his protectiveness. "All right, that's enough of that," Cal grumbled. "Good-bye, Dr. Foster."

He moved toward the door to escort the ladies out. Terry looked away, perhaps a bit of blush on his cheeks but that would inquire he had some shame. "Wow, Cal, that's so charming."

"Well it's been twenty-two years, hasn't it?" Cal shot back.

Terry took the opportunity to rub Cal's face in the dirt just a little more. "Listen, Gill, you fancy meeting us for a drink later?"

Gillian blushed at his forwardness, which only made Cal angrier. Before she could answer, Cal stepped in again. "It's Gillian, actually, and she's busy."

Instead she accepted Terry's coffee cup and looked back at Cal's intense gaze. They were flooded with emotions that she knew very well only she could see. The largest one of all was desperation. "Call me if you need me."

Gillian nodded before he escaped out the door, expecting Terry to follow, but Terry turned back to Gillian. "Listen-"

Cal's voice sounded from the hallway. "Oi!"

Terry turned on his heels again. "Yes," he muttered finally actually following Cal.

Gillian looked back at Torres. "Well that was… interesting."

Torres looked back at her and hummed with agreement. This was something they knew better than to sit around and discuss, so Gillian headed back toward her office to work on budgeting. She didn't mind doing the business part of their company usually, but lately it's been driving her insane. She needed to get out of the office. Actually…

She looked over at her cell phone. She needed to call Carrie and get it over with already, but she was dreading it. Truthfully she knew that she was being irrational, but this was Lucy. She was allowed to be a bit irrational when it came to her daughter.

Taking a deep breath, she dialed the number on her office line and listened to it ring. _"Hey, Gill, I was hoping you'd be able to get back to me before lunch,"_ Carrie said cheerfully.

Gill released the breath she didn't know she was holding. "So this is a personal call?"

"_Sort of. I was hoping to catch up with you for lunch. Got plans?" _

"Not unless some emergency comes up, which happens from time to time. Let's go someplace with good chocolate cake," Gillian told her with a smile, absently tracing the frame of Lucy's smiling face.

"_The Cup? Meet you there at noon."_

Gillian nodded to herself. "Sounds good. See ya then."

She hung up the phone and looked at the grinning little girl in the picture. It was only a week or so old and she was sitting at the top of the slide with a big smile. Gillian could almost hear her calling to her. _"Mommy! You wanna go down too?"_

Gillian smiled. She would fight tooth and nail for that girl, no one would ever take her baby girl away. Cal would fight with her.

Gillian kept her cell phone close as she grabbed her purse several hours later. Just in case Cal needed her, or she needed him. When it came to conversations about Lucy, no one knew. She wasn't happy to find out the FBI was watching Cal's friend Terry was on the FBI's watch list at the current moment which meant Cal was being watched as well.

Cal had a way of making things difficult for her. But he usually made it up to her. Perhaps that was one of the reasons she was so attracted to him. He had a way of daring her and testing her in way that made her want to kill him, but at the end of the day, she would rather hold him instead.

"Gill!" Carrie called to her as she walked up the sidewalk to The Cup. Gillian smiled at her friend and accepted the warm hug. "Are you actually eating, or just getting cake?" she teased lightly.

Gill shrugged as they walked into the entrance. "I'm not sure yet."

The hostess sat them almost immediately and Gillian ordered herself a glass of wine. Carrie did the same and looked across the table at her friend.

"How are you?" she asked, exhaling.

Gillian gave her a sober look. "Let's cut the small talk, you know I hate beating around the bush when Lucy's involved."

A satisfied smile twitched at Carrie's lips. "If only more foster parents were like you, Gill." Carrie then reached into her purse and pulled out a folder.

Gillian groaned as she realized there was more paperwork. "I thought this paper work was done."

There was still a big smile on Carrie's face as she pushed the paper closer. Gill pulled the paper closer to her and flipped the folder open. Part of Carrie wanted to take out her phone and take a picture of her expression. "Adoption forms."

Carrie nodded vigorously. "It's the first step."

Tears were pricking at Gillian's eyes as she covered her mouth with her free hand. She didn't know what to say as tears were barely held back. This was one of those things that she wanted more than anything, but the fact she could have it was something completely different. If Lucy was ever taken away, it may very well kill Gillian to have another child taken away from her.

Carrie leaned forward and patted Gillian's arm. "We're going to do everything you can so you can stay Lucy's mommy."

Gillian sucked in a breath and nodded. Immediately Gillian took a pen out of her purse and began.


	7. Trust Me

Cal didn't call her last night which concerned her, but immediately she felt clingy and brushed it off. It was just difficult to comprehend in her mind. Normally he made an excuse to call her, something stupid about work or just to ask how Lucy was doing, but last night he didn't call. She knew it was most likely from his friend being in town, and she remembered the way he looked at her before he left.

She was relieved when she woke up to a couple text messages from him, telling her he'd be at work late and he'd see her when they got to work. She found herself picking out a blue dress because it was one that Cal had mentioned before that he liked on her. Cal also had an influence in Lucy's scarf that morning because Lucy was dead set on seeing Cal after school.

She had managed to get out the door rather quickly, even with Lucy forgetting her backpack once and having to turn around, something the little girl apologized several times for.

It was going to be a long day, simply because they were working on a school threat. The kids were only in middle school and sometimes it seriously disturbed Gillian how kids so young could be so desperate as to go to homicidal intent.

The conversation with the headmaster had already happened, and though he wasn't happy he did agree to close the school until the threat could be dealt with. They also had already taped the students' reaction to the film and were pulling those who seemed to be affected by the video.

It was nearly ten by the time Cal walked into the video lab wearing the same clothes he was wearing yesterday. Gillian furrowed her brow as he walked by, completely ignoring her. That usually meant he was trying to avoid something that she would see that the rest of the team wouldn't.

He nodded at Torres as he watched the video. "Hey."

She gave him a funny look. "Hey?"

Something on the video caught his eyes. "Whoa, go back a few seconds, would you?"

Loker leaned over Gillian's shoulder to obey and they all watched a little closer to see what he saw. The he nodded again. "There you go. Right. See this girl?" He motioned to the girl in the furthest corner to the left of the screen. "Same girl. She glances at the teacher. There you go. See?"

They all watched. "And he catches her eye. Yeah?" Cal kept going. "He's got his eye on her for some reason."

Loker stepped forward. "So does this girl here. Look." He pointed to a girl that was a little heavier than the other girls in the room. "Then she looks over at that guy."

Cal nods. "Nice one, Loker."

Everyone raises their eyebrows at that, and Gillian begins to get really concerned. Gillian watched him as he moved past her. "You look awful," she stated, unable to hide the worry in her features.

He shrugged. "And yet, I feel so much worse."

It was obvious she didn't know how to take that, but by the end of the day, everything made perfect sense. She was angry and hurt that he didn't confide in her with what was happening, especially since he could have been killed. Even Lucy could see that her mother was frustrated.

She eventually went to Loker and Torres, convincing them and Reynolds that they needed to have an intervention of sorts with Cal. Lucy could stay in Gillian's office, completely occupied by the markers and paper she was provided as the rest of them waited in Cal's office.

Torres kept looking at Gillian. "This isn't a good idea. He's going to be pissed."

Gillian kept a straight face, wanting to tell her that if Cal was pissed then at least she got a reaction out of him.

By the time Cal walked in, she was almost too happy to see him, but she had to stay on the task at hand.

He gave them all a startled look. "Hi."

Gillian stood a little straighter. "Have a seat," she insisted, motioning to the couch.

"Why?" he replied moving toward his desk, ignoring her request.

"This is an intervention," Reynolds explained.

Cal furrowed his brow. "What?" Then he looked around at the others in the room. "Alright. So I had a, you know, few drinks with a mate. Yeah, well= more than a few."

Torres leaned forward, resting her elbows on her thighs. "This isn't about drinking."

"Well, then," he turned around and entered his library and exited it again. "If it's about poker, I won a hundred grand."

Gillian exhaled through her nose. Great, poker was involved too. Finally, she approached him as he moved behind his desk. This was her and him now, she didn't care about the others anymore. She needed him to see that she was hurt and worried.

"It's not about gambling either," she told him, letting the hurt be heard in her voice.

"What it is about then?" he asked, seeming completely uninterested.

"It's about you trusting us," she said desperately. He peeked over the top of his paper at her, but just for a second. He realized he was hurting her, that he had hurt her and now he was rubbing salt in the wounds he created. "You were in trouble and you never came to us."

He reached out to her. "Wait a minute-"

"No! You wait!" she demanded, feeling more frustrated. He needed to hear her. "We're a team and you risked you life without letting us help you."

Cal finally threw down the papers he was holding, tired of this conversation already. "Look, I wouldn't be here at all if it wasn't for Terry Marsh."

Gillian looked at him, trying to process just what that meant, but Loker interrupted her. "Fine, but where does that leave us?"

Cal's face turned stony again as he grabbed his car keys. "That leaves you all fired."

Torres scoffed. "You gotta be kidding, I didn't even want to do this intervention thing!"

Cal pointed at her. "Just you then, for having no spine."

Torres shook her head as she stood up. "I don't believe this."

"Good," Cal said with a shrug. "Cause I'm lying. Oh, what? You didn't spot that? Oh, did your emotions get in the way? You should really work on that." He took a deep breath and gave them all a satisfied grin. "Well, this has been terrific. Really, fantastic. Quite the intervention. We should do this again soon, very soon."

With that, he closed the door to his office behind him and headed for the exit.

If there was ever a time Gillian wanted to bang her head against a wall, it was now. She let out a frustrated sigh before heading after him. "The intervention was my idea," she told him as she followed him down the hallway.

They both stopped, Cal looking at her in a way that surprised her. It was in that moment that she realized she should have went to him alone. She should have told him how much it hurt her and only her to be left out of the loop because, in truth, what she needed to say couldn't be said in front of everyone else. What he needed to tell her, he wanted to share with just her.

This time he didn't run away from her, instead he moved toward her doing his nervous shifty dance that he did when he was revealing something about himself that made him feel vulnerable. She knew better than to touch him first, instead she let him lead.

Suddenly there was a story rolling off his tongue so fast that she knew better than to interrupt. "My mum died when I was young, and my dad was long gone by then. Terry and his family, they took me in, even though there was no room, even less money. And one day, um, Terry and I got into a bit of trouble with the police." His eyes suddenly met hers and she could see the shame and regret, but before she could ask he kept going. "Not your concern. But.. they were on their way, and there was no way we could get out of it… without one of us acting as a decoy for the other."

She nodded. "So Terry took the fall for you?"

"Yeah, he did." Cal rubbed his face and shook his head. "He said that, uh, 'You're supposed to use that brain of yours for something, not be dragged down into the much by stupid bastards like me.'"

The look on Cal's face told Gillian more than his words. "He was right," she promised him.

"Yeah, he was. Yeah. Cost him three years of his life. So anyone who wants to compete for my loyalty with Terry Marsh, not really in a fair fight."

There was a moment where Gillian just didn't know what to say. She knew he was right, but she wanted him to realize that if something would have happened to him earlier that day, she would have to explain it to the little girl that thought Cal Lightman hung the moon.

The very little girl that was suddenly running down the hallway toward him. "Cal!"

He turned around and beamed at the bouncing brown curls darting his way. The little girl wrapped her arms around his legs as she plowed into him, closing her eyes as she hugged him tight. "I missed you, Cal!"

He couldn't help but laugh at her. "Why?"

The big blue eyes looked up at him. "I haven't seen you in days!"

Gillian watched as Cal lifted the girl into his arms and placed a kiss on her cheek. "Well, I'm here now, but I'm really tired."

Lucy pouted. "That means you're not coming home with us?"

Cal exchanged glances with Gillian. "How about we go by my house so I can pick up some clothes and then I'll come over. Maybe Emily can come too?"

Gillian nodded and watched as a big grin took over Lucy's face. "Emily too? She always helps me color!"

Apparently that idea was a winner. When they all arrived at Gillian's townhouse, Cal and Gillian sat together at her bar as Emily and Lucy did things in the other room. Cal's hand moved up and down her thigh, trying to comfort her.

"I'm sorry, if that's any constellation," he told her finally as the silence became too much for him.

She smirked. "Cal Lightman apologized? Wow."

"When it's important enough… You're concerned about me being stupid and something happening to me when Lucy is already attached," Cal told her studying her expression. She didn't hide it. It was written all in her expression. "Gillian," he breathed, touching her face.

There was a flash of regret as she instinctively pulled away from him. It hurt him more than he would like to admit.

"It takes a lot to get me, Gillian," he tried to tell her lightly.

Tears were building in her eyes as she wiped her face with the back of her hand. "One day that luck of yours is going to run out."

"Gillian…"

"No, Cal," she said sternly. "It's not fair that your feel the need to put yourself at risk without telling me. If I'm trusting you with Lucy, you need to trust me."

He watched her. He cupped her face with his hand and caressed her cheek with his thumb. "Gillian-"

She looked into his eyes. They were not their usual passive self, they were intense and demanding. "Don't give me a deflection. I need a promise, Cal."

He looked at her and leaned in and kissed her lips softly. "No near death experiences without telling you first. Scout's honor."

She couldn't help but laugh at that a little. "I have a feeling you were never a boy scout."

"Human lie detector you are."

Emily stood in the doorway realizing that what she wanted for a very long time was about to come true, but she knew better than to interrupt a moment that could very well change her life. Lucy came up behind her.

"What are you doing, Emmy?" she asked not getting a glance inside at what their parents were going.

A smile came to Emily's lips as she reached down and took Lucy's hand. "I'm thinking that life is about to change."


	8. Family Matters

There were many buttons Emily knew better than to push when it came to her father, but he did see Gillian's face when she had to tell Lucy that they'd be spending Thanksgiving alone. Lucy had gotten extremely used to Cal being around anytime she needed him, and he took the cake when it came to teaching her to tie her shoes. Emily had to invite Gillian and Lucy to Thanksgiving, even if it did include Zoe.

Gillian at first refused, saying they couldn't intrude. Emily had already convinced her father, telling him that Lucy and Gillian should never be alone on holiday and Lucy deserved the whole experience. It took a bit of convincing, but Gillian finally agreed.

So, there Gillian stood outside Cal's home, in her comfortable maroon dress that Emily not so subtly insisted she wear with Lucy in a new dress that was a flattering orange against her olive skin. She had prepared herself for sarcasm, for passive aggressive behavior, hell even for straight out aggression, but what she didn't expect was the look of surprise on Zoe's face when she answered the door.

"Gillian, what a, uh, surprise."

Gillian's face burned red with embarrassment as she was already prepared to kill Emily and Cal. Zoe then looked down at the little girl who was trying to hide behind her mother's leg. "And who is this?"

It would be a lie if Gillian would have said she expected Cal and Emily to keep Lucy from Zoe, but she honestly thought the little girl would have had to come up in some sort of conversation. Somewhere.

Before she could get a word out, Cal came pushing his way through the door. "I was wonderin' when ya'd get here. Well, don't just stand there, Em's cooking!"

Lucy's big blue eyes immediately sparkled at Cal. "There's turkey?" she asked softly, for once getting a word out before her mother.

Cal completely ignored Zoe as she stared at him in disbelief as he snatch Lucy's hand. "Course there's turkey. And I saved ya some marshmellows before they got put on the sweet potatoes."

The two disappeared into the house as Zoe looked to Gillian for an explanation. "That's Lucy," she said as though it explained everything in the world.

There was a bit of realization in Zoe's eyes. "Ah, that's Lucy. I was expecting someone older."

Gillian gave her a funny look as Zoe allowed her entrance into her home. "Emily asked me if her friend Lucy and her mother could join us for Thanksgiving. I didn't realize…" Zoe suddenly looked a bit humbled. "It seems they thought they'd have to lie to me in order to allow you over for Thanksgiving."

"It's not secret we've never been the best of friends," Gillian told her in an understanding tone.

Lucy's giggles erupted from the kitchen, immediately making Gillian smile. The little girl came running back into the living area, already missing her shoes, and grabbed Gillian's hand. "Mommy, you're missing all the fun!"

Gillian pulled Lucy into a hug and turned her around to face Zoe. "Please say hello, Lucy. Don't be rude."

Despite her shyness, she obeyed. "Hello. Thank you for letting us join you on Thanksgiving."

Truth be told, Gillian was rather impressed. She had asked her daughter to be polite and she was doing just that.

Zoe smiled at the little girl who had just proved she could win anyone over. Emily came running back at Lucy and scooped up the girl. "You're missing the fun!"

Gillian felt guilty for intruding on Zoe's family time, but she would be lying if she said she didn't enjoy herself. By the time Zoe left, Gillian was ready to curl up in Cal's arms and drink a nice glass of wine.

But that would have to come later. Emily tossed Gillian another cookie as Cal walked into the living room with Lucy's arms draped around his neck and her head falling lazily on his shoulder. She was exhausted and had actually fallen asleep in two of the kitchen chairs.

"Do you ever feed this thing?" he teased carrying Lucy over to the couch and gently laying her in Gillian's arms.

The little being cuddled into her mother as Gillian wrapped her arms around the girl's shoulder. "Of course I feed her," she countered. "I just didn't know she liked Turkey so much."

Lucy nodded against Gillian's chest, her eyes still closed. "Turkey and potatoes…"

"You act like you could live on turkey and potatoes, turkey," Emily teased her poking Lucy's sides.

She wiggled around as she giggled, finally turning around and scrunching her face at Emily. She tried to look angry, but that wasn't an emotion Lucy held very well. "I'm not a turkey!"

Gillian laughed. "No, but you are a sleepy little girl." She stood up, shifting Lucy to where she could carry her. If they didn't leave soon they'd not be able to get out of there at all. "I think we better be going home."

Emily suddenly looked extremely disappointed. "Oh, come on, stay. Please?"

Just as she was about assure Emily that they should really be getting home, Cal jumped in. "Stay, Gill. Emily can watch Lucy if you want me to take you by your place to get clothes. It's going to be crazy in the city."

The look on Cal's face told her he was planning something, but she wasn't sure quite yet. Emily looked back at Gillian with her round brown eyes doing their worst. "Please, Gillian."

She looked between Cal and Emily, and in truth she wanted to say yes, but she knew that Lucy wasn't ready for a night away from the home she had only recently gotten used to. So, Gillian shook her head. "I'm sorry, but not tonight."

The disappointment was obvious on both of the Lightmans' faces which only broke Gillian's heart more. "But Sunday," she added with a smile. "Sunday Lucy and I will come by for lunch. I have to go to my mother's sometime this weekend."

Gillian leaned in and kissed Emily's forehead as she accepted a hug. "Promise?" Emily asked still holding Gillian with Lucy between them.

"Promise, sweet heart."

Cal followed her to the door, his arm snaking around her waist as she turned to him. She smiled at him and pecked his lips. Just as she was about to pull away, he tighten his grip and kissed her again. She smiled against him as Lucy continued her slumber.

His eyes watched her face, drinking in every feature and loving every single inch of her. The smile she was holding on her perfectly pink lips told him that she was enjoying his closeness just as much as he was. The flash of slightly oblique eyebrows showed true sadness that she had to leave.

"Drive carefully, love."

She kissed his lips again and looked deep into his eyes. "See you Sunday, Cal."

Emily smiled as she spied from the door way, watching as Gillian said goodbye and closed the door behind her. Cal turned around to see his daughter standing there, looking at least a little bit victorious. A part of Emily's world she had always hoped for was falling into place.

"Wipe that cheeky grin off your face," he told her lightly. Emily just continued to grin. "Or don't that's fine too."

Playing with the end of her hair, she fell into step beside her father as they walked back toward the kitchen. The smile Cal was trying to hide from her gave her even more hope than if he was blindly happy. If he wasn't afraid to hide that Cheshire grin that was tugging at the corners of his mouth, Emily would be sure that his cockiness would screw this up, that it would end like every other relationship for her dad. The fact he was a little nervous was a good thing, at least in Emily's mind it was.

More than anything, Emily wanted to be blunt. Call her father out on being in a relationship with Gillian, but she worried about what might happen if she did that. Instead, she wore her own Cheshire grin, hoping for the best.

The next morning it was barely noon when Emily swung open the door to see a flustered, but pleased, Gillian standing at the door with her hand still poised to knock. Lucy looked over the head of a stuffed puppy that Emily had never seen before, but could already tell it was a little roughed up.

"Thank God you're here," Emily said taking a deep breath inviting Gillian in. "Are you any good at calculus?"

Gillian looked a little bit concerned as Lucy went ahead and searched for Cal. "Um, I was in college, but that was years ago."

Emily pointed at a section in her book and Gillian frowned. Maybe she needed a refresher. "Let me think on this a while," she told Emily. The girl nodded and continued working on something else as Gillian carried the book in the kitchen to find Cal holding Lucy over the stove letting her stir something.

"I'm cooking," Lucy announced to her mother proudly.

"I have given her the very important job of stirrin' the soup," Cal explained. "Turkey noodle." Gillian smiled as she leaned across the counter, accepting his simple peck. "How was your mothers?"

In a flash her smile was wiped away and she groaned. Lucy crossed her arms. "Mommy's momma kept tellin' her that I wasn't-"

Gillian gave her daughter a warning look, knowing that her mother did everything but make a good impression to Lucy. "Horrid, to say the least."

Cal could see that she was truly upset and frustrated by this, but she had never really had a relationship with her mother. He knew that Gillian's mother always had other plans for her daughter. To become a "real" doctor and not some quack psychologist. Lucy escaped from his grasp to go see what Emily was working on.

"Oi! What happened to my soup stirrer?" Cal called after her as he reached for a bottle of Pinot Grigio for Gillian.

Gillian sighed. "Lucy, leave Emily alone. She's doing homework."

But Emily had already pulled Lucy into her lap and was explaining her chemistry homework to the five year old. Even though she didn't understand it, Lucy listened intently. It was adorable, but Lucy honestly thought the Lightmans were the most amazing people in the world. Except for maybe her mommy.

Putting the glass of wine to her lips, she sighed as she looked down at the calculus homework she was asked to help with. Finally she turned back to give the book back to Emily. "Has calculus got harder since we took it?" Gillian called over her shoulder to Cal, already smiling at the way Lucy was honestly trying to understand AP Chemistry.

Cal threw up a towel in the kitchen. "That's what I said!"

Emily shrugged. "It's fine, I'll figure it out myself. I mean, you'd think with the intellectual stock I come from though-"

Gillian picked up some of the chocolate covered peanuts that were sitting on the table and plopped them in her mouth. "Apples always fall farther away from the tree than you think."

Call came walking in wearing his floral apron and plopped a bowl of turkey noodle soup down at the seat across from Emily. "That's something to be thankful for, right Em?"

Gillian chuckled as she reached for her wine. "It gives the girl some hope."

Cal rolled his eyes and moved back toward the kitchen, this time with Gillian following him as Emily poked Lucy's sides. "So much to be thankful for."

Lucy nodded with enthusiastic agreement.

The doorbell rang and Emily got up to answer it, Lucy holding her hand as she went. "At least Mom probably won't insist on another make believe family holiday!"

"We can only hope, luv," Cal called back as Gillian looked a little torn.

"Maybe I shouldn't have intruded," she told him quietly.

Cal gave her a firm look. "No, Lucy and you deserve a real holiday."

It was pointless to argue with him, especially when she wasn't actually regretting coming. She had a spectacular time and she was hoping for something similar again. So instead, she squinted her eyes at him, watching as he worked in the kitchen.

"You're a little odd," she inquired, a teasing smile on her lips.

He looked up at her, honestly confused. "Why?"

"The apron," she stated simply, smiling even more as he glanced down at the pink and yellow flowers that were covering his nice black t-shirt.

"I think it's becoming," he replied matter of factly.

She took a step toward him and clicked her tongue. "Do you?"

He leaned across the counter, ready to kiss her. "I think it's working its magic now."

Before they could get any closer, Emily and Lucy's footsteps interrupted them. "Hey, uh, Dad. Gill—" They all turned around to see a third person coming in behind their girls. Cal wiped his hands and dropped the towel on the counter already studying the boy like an threat. "This is Max Roland. Uh, apparently he's sixteen and a big fan of your book."

Alarms blared in Cal's head as he appeared from behind the counter, his body language already screaming aggressive. Gillian was watching the boy more than she was watching Cal, but she could already see fear on his face even under the smile he was forcing.

"Over here, Em. You and Lucy over here. You know better," Cal commanded soft enough to not scare Lucy. Immediately Emily obeyed, taking Lucy's hand and pulling her over to the other side of the room. Instinctively, Gillian put herself between the boy and Emily and Lucy, but stayed supportively behind Cal.

Suddenly Cal was in the boy's face, a very direct way of finding out whether or not the boy was threatening. "My address isn't listed," Cal stated, moving with the boy as he stumbled back. Even though Cal was a few inches shorter, they all knew who held the power in the room. "How did you find me?"

The boy struggled to find his words. "Online."

Lucy's hand found Gillian's, holding onto it nervously. "Mommy?" she asked nervously.

Gillian pulled her a little closer and shushed her gently, never taking her eyes off Cal and the boy. "I just need a half an hour of your time, Dr. Lightman."

Cal threw his arm eye level and pulled back his sleeve, revealing his watch. "You got two minutes."

The boy's eyes flashed alarm, but also hope. "Uhh—my parents have lied to me my whole life about who I am. I'm not their kid."

Cal kept watching his features, knowing that Gillian was right behind him doing the same. "Who are you then?"

The boy shuffled through some of the papers he was holding in his hand until he pulled out a missing child's poster and held it up. "I'm this kid. James Knox."

Suddenly he had all of Gillian's attention. She handed Lucy off to Emily and stepped forward. "The James Knox?"

Without even looking at the poster, Cal snatched away from him. "Well, how do you know you're him?" Emily asked surprising them all for a split second. Gillian would have told Emily to take Lucy upstairs, but she was too busy focusing on the boy's expressions.

"Look at this scar," the boy explained, lifting up his shirt to reveal a six inch pink scar going down the middle of his torso. Gillian studied it, the first time taking her eyes off his face. "James Knox has one just like it."

"Well, we've all got scars," Cal snapped. "You want to see mine?"

The boy struggled for another moment as he dropped his shirt. "Look, I took a D.N.A. sample from my parents, all right? I'm not a match. Their story of how I was born, it doesn't make sense. I can't spend another Christmas with people who might have stolen me." Finally, he looked between Cal and Gillian, his eyes meeting Gillian's for a second longer than Cal's, most likely sensing she was the one with the kinder heart. "Please, I have five hundred dollars. This is all I have to pay you. Will you talk to my parents? I have to know the truth."

All eyes were on Cal as the boy held the money for him to take. Emily opened her mouth for a second, but closed it again as Lucy held tight to her hand. Gillian was torn on what she wanted him to do, but she knew this was a decision Cal would make.

Finally, Cal snatched the money away from the boy. "You want a sandwich?" he asked, his entire demeanor more friendly.

Seven hours Emily was watching Lucy and Cal and Gillian had sent the boy home with his possible abductors as well as found out Max was not James Knox because James Knox was apparently dead. Gillian was less than happy, but Cal was extremely turned on by the way her brain was currently working. He finally had her thinking like a criminal, and though it changed his overall view on Gillian, he found it extremely sexy.

Something he enjoyed telling her, just to watch her cheeks flush red.

Gillian was worried though. This boy was headed in for a lot of pain. There was a lot of hit and miss along the way and even Gillian lying to Emily, something she could honestly say was one of the worst things she's ever done, but days later Max was reunited with his birth father. His father was a parole officer that was shot by a drug dealer named Romeo. Romeo killed his wife, kidnapped his son to smother him later, while leaving the man himself in wheel chair forever.

Max kept his head down as he walked. "This this co-custody thing will work?" he asked bashfully as Lucy watched the house in front of them.

"Two sets of parents is better than none," Gillian told him kindly. She had grown rather attached to the boy and really would hate to see him hurt again.

He sighed and shook his head. "This is so screwed up."

Emily looked at Max as the five of them walked toward the home he grew up in. She thought about how he accused her of having the perfect family and how she corrected him with the honest truth. How Lucy was not her sister and Gillian was not her mother. How Lucy was a foster kid that wouldn't even speak until a month or so ago. How her father can read every lie she tells him and how she knows her mother sometimes sets out just to make her father miserable. The truth was, at the end of the day. She loved the quirks of her family. Gillian and Lucy included.

She didn't smile at him, instead looked at him soberly so he would understand she was not bending the truth. "Just give it a chance. These things kinda end up working themselves out."

Both Cal and Gillian caught the thoughtful tone in Emily's voice and almost wondered what she was thinking.

Lucy looked up at Max and gave him a big smile. "I sure your daddy will love you like my mommy loves me even though we haven't always been together."

Something about that little girl had a way of charming a smile onto anyone's face. Max nodded and offered the little girl his fist to bump, something he found fun to teach her. Then he looked at the three people waiting for him in front of his house, and back to the people who helped him get where he was.

Cal nodded. "Go on. Off you go, son."

Slowly her turned back around and took his first steps toward his new life. Emily exhaled the breath she didn't know she was holding as Gillian held Lucy against her legs.

Cal looked over at Gillian. "Hell of a rabbit, that one."

She nodded. "We made it."

They all watched as the four people entered the house. The kid was lucky. He had a lot of people that cared about him now.

Gillian then looked over to Emily. The girl had made it very clear she did not approve of being lied to, but maybe this time she'd bend her own rules. "So, have you forgiven us?"

Emily shrugged. "I guess." Then she looked over at Cal. "Have you?"

Gillian smiled. It was true, Emily had started off with the lie. She was the one that said she didn't know where the boy was when they needed him. "You were a protecting your friend…" Cal reasoned with a half of shrug. "So.. You are your father's daughter."

"Well, I know a little bit about how crazy families can be," Emily told him as they all turned around and started walking toward their car. "You think he'll be all right?"

Cal looked back in the direction they had last seen the boy. "Don't know. Hope so."

Lucy held Gillian's hand as they walked, looking up at Emily the entire way. "Maybe we should invite him to Thanksgiving next year," Emily offered.

Gillian chuckled. "He'd fit right in with us."

Cal rolled his eyes as he gave Emily a slight push. "Yeah." They all chuckled as Cal pulled Emily under his arm and hugged her to his side, before she threw her other arm over Gillian's shoulders too.

"I mean, I think there's a lot of love here, don't you?" Emily asked looking between the adults.

They all smiled. Lucy then looked up at them. "Are we going to get more turkey and potatoes now? I'm hungry."

Cal smirked as Gillian chuckled. "You definitely starve that girl."

"Dinner at my place?" Gillian offered as she lifted Lucy into her carseat so Emily could buckle her in.

"Sounds lovely. Would you like to borrow my apron?" Cal tossed back as he climbed into the driver's seat.

Gill sent him a look as she opened her own door and climbed in. "Do you lend your apron to criminal masterminds?"

"Hell, it's reserved for those who hold that title."

Gillian laughed heartily as Cal's hand found hers on the console. The two continued to argue back and forth, teasing each other about anything and everything. Emily looked over at Lucy who was smiling to herself as she watched her mother bicker with one of her favorite people in the world.

"What are you smiling at?" Emily whispered, not wanting to interrupt the scene either.

Lucy looked over at Emily and looked her square in the eye. "This is my family isn't it?"

Emily never thought about what that meant to a little girl who was never loved like she was, not until now. Emily looked back up at Gillian and Cal. They had fallen into a comfortable silence, their hands resting together on the console. If Emily had to share her dad with anyone, she would gladly share him with Lucy.

Emily nodded as she smiled at the little girl. "This is your family."

_**I really hope you guys like this so far. Please let me know what you all think. **_


	9. Secret Santa

Lucy came running into the offices, paving the way for Emily and the large tree. She was wearing her big fluffy coat as her feet danced on the floor with surprising grace and a look of pure joy on her face. She twirled in joyous circles, her toes pointed like she had been trained in dance until she danced right into Cal.

"Look!" she said pleased. "It's the biggest and prettiest tree I've ever see!"

He just kept staring at the tree with extreme bitterness. Christmas was not his holiday. It just wasn't. It was more along the lines of Gillian's holiday. She didn't wear Christmas sweaters or pins, but she did wear Christmas spirit.

Cal squinted at the tree. "How much?"

Emily rolled her eyes as Lucy leaned against him. "Relax, Dad," Emily told him. "It's a tax write-off."

"It's a rip-off more like," Cal grumbled.

Gillian appeared from around the corner and Lucy went running to her. "Look, Mommy! Look at the tree! It's so pretty!"

"It's gorgeous, girls!" Gillian clapped her hands excitedly, already wanting to get a hand in on decorating the tree. Lucy nodded excitedly as she looked up excitedly. She was light on her feet as she danced around on her toes around her mother.

"Are we gunna get a tree for home too? Or just this one for the Christmas party?" the little girl asked.

Cal glanced at her. "Christmas party?"

Gillian kept smiling, meeting his gaze. "The one you're throwing for you fantastic staff."

Lucy looked up at her mother. "Me too?"

"Of course. Your staff plus Lucy and Emily," she corrected herself as she stroked Lucy's hair.

"You always said they're just like family to you," Emily added, twisting her hips slightly.

Cal narrowed his eyes. "You two, you're in this together aren't you?" He looked down at Lucy. "You may be my only hope. Repeat after me: Bah humbug."

Lucy shook her head as she giggled. "Cal, don't be a Grinch."

Gillian chuckled. "Bah humbug is Scrooge actually, sweetheart."

Cal shook his head as he scooped Lucy up, tickling her stomach. The little girl struggled against him as she laughed.

"Oh! Uh, Dad," Emily said awkwardly. "I'd like you to meet Nick Massey." Her words were short and quick, already worried about how he would react and already looking to Gillian for help in keeping her father in line.

Cal immediately stopped his tickling as the dark haired, clean cut boy stood in front of him. Nerves were etched into ever feature in his face, which meant Cal had something to work with. Gill shook her head at Cal's initial reaction. She knew this was one of those times she'd have to step in.

"Oh yeah?" Cal studied him even more as he let Lucy back to her feet.

Lucy noticed the tension quickly as well. "Rick is really nice, Cal. He even helped us pick out the tree," the little one tried, but knowingly stood closer to her mother.

Cal kept both hands in his pocket as Emily's friend offered his hand out. Gillian decided to take pity on him since Cal definitely wouldn't. "I'm Gill," she introduced, shaking his hand. "Lucy's mom."

Relief washed over him. At least someone was being welcoming to him. Emily kept staring at her dad, hoping that he'd be civil, but she doubted it was going to happen.

Before Cal could say anything else though, another woman appeared through the office doors. She was accompanied by a man in a suit that screamed government official. "Dr. Lightman," she greeted politely before handing him a small card.

He looked at it as Gill studied the other two people. They were here for something very serious. Their faces sober and it made her heart drop. All she wanted was a quiet Christmas with Cal and the kids.

Cal snapped back into reality. "Right. You're with me," he told the woman then glanced at Gill. "You too."

Gill guided the others down the hall as Cal instructed Emily to watch Lucy and made Lucy promise to report any touch Emily and _Dick_ chose to do. Both girls rolled their eyes.

The woman was trying to appear intimidating, but after being with Cal as long as she was government officials were just more kids on the play ground. She was nice enough, but Gillian felt like she was too loyal to Cal to say anything before he arrived.

Call quickly called the woman out on being NSA as she instructed Gill to boot up the satellite link system. He stayed very close to Gillian, his hands on her shoulders as she pulled up the screen.

They had dealt with the government's top secret, classified business before. They knew to tread lightly even if Cal didn't really obey, but they did listen. There were two marines that were separated from their platoon during a skirmish. They found an American with the Taliban/ Franko James Vincent from Baltimore.

Gillian cringed as she stared at the screen. "Oh my God."

"American who went over to the Taliban or—" Cal began but was quickly cut off.

"Don't know what he is yet," the woman insisted. "All we know for sure is he's given up a Taliban compound in the Greman Valley where he swears they're holding the two marines."

Cal kept looking at the screen, studying the features of the man on the screen. Searching the man's features through the beard and through the hair for a base line. His hands slid across Gill's shoulders as he moved closer. "Well, I get what you want from me." He glanced over to Gill. "Uh, transmit."

She obeyed. They gave each other a brief nod. "Mr. Vincent," Cal said loudly. "You say you know where the Taliban are holding two U.S. marines?"

He paused, trying to watch the man's face but the signal sucked. There was so much that he couldn't make out, in fact he couldn't make out anything.

"How do we know you're telling the truth?" Cal tried again. He looked thoroughly frustrated at the gritty screen.

"_I don't want to die."_ It was the only thing the man said that Cal could get a read on.

"All right. The part about not wanting to die, that's true enough, right?" he glanced back at Gill. Voices were her thing. That was what she was great at. She nodded in agreement but didn't take her eyes off the screen. "When did you join the Taliban?" Cal demanded.

"_I was an aid worker, and I was teaching school when the war broke out." _Cal and Gillian both watched, trying to read him, but it was nearly impossible. _"And-and I got very sick in a village, and they—they saved my life."_

Finally, Cal had enough. He turned away from the screen and shook his head. There was no point in watching him anymore. "That's enough. Stop there."

Gillian looked over at him. "No denial about being Taliban," she tossed in.

With a single shoulder, he shrugged. "No. Well, the delays not helping," he groaned. She looked thoroughly aggravated. "Um—But I mean, I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him."

The woman that still remained nameless to Gillian nodded. "He's lying then."

Cal pressed his lips into a then line then gritted his teeth as he tossed the idea around in a way he could explain it to her. Then he just gave up the idea of that. "You'd need to bring him here for me to get a proper read. I'm sorry."

"While we mount a mission to rescue those marines, we'll have to treat him like an operational asset," she looked him square in the eye. "In country."

Gillian watched as Cal took in what that meant. She prayed that he'd just wash his hands of it. That he'd tell the woman to go to Riker or anyone that meant him staying in the U.S. and not getting dumped into the middle of a war zone.

"Look, if you think you're gonna send me to Afghanistan-" he began but was quickly cut off but the woman's posture change.

Gillian and him both knew that's exactly what she planned to do. Gillian closer her eyes and sucked in a breath not wanting to even touch that subject. Whether Gill was Cal's girlfriend or business partner she had very little say in these matters, especially when the federal government was involved.

Cal stuck out his jaw as he bit the inside of his cheek. "You do think you're gonna send me to Afghanistan, don't you?" The only response she gave him was a sad sort of smile. "And there was I, dreaming of a white Christmas. How quick can you get me there?"

Gillian suddenly felt ill as she got to her feet. Just because she knew he wouldn't say no didn't mean she wasn't hoping he would. "Cal."

He looked over at her and raised his eyebrows. There were two marines with children that could die at anytime. In his mind his hands were tied.

"Have a helicopter on the roof," the other woman told him. "It'll get you to Andrews in 20, wheels up in 30."

Gillian just rested her face in her hands as she tried to digest this. Sometimes she really hated this job, usually when it involved Cal risking his life.

"All right," Cal agreed easily. "And, um, Gill." He met her eyes. There may have even been an apology in those deep eyes of his, but there was definitely concern in his and hers. "Not a word of this to Emily, all right?"

She pursed her lips. "Lucy too then?"

He paused and looked back at her. Now there definitely was an apology. Still he nodded before heading out the door to find the girls. He didn't have very much time to find and say goodbye to both girls, plus he knew he'd have to give Gillian a real goodbye.

Emily and Lucy were both in his office. Lucy sitting at his desk coloring while Emily held a bag up to his face. "Hey, what's that?" he asked her, not hiding his disgust.

"It's secret Santa," Emily told him as he tried to look over Lucy's head to see what she was working on but she did her best to hide it. "You pick a name, and you get that person a gift. There's a twenty dollar limit. It's for the Christmas party."

Cal rolled his eyes but nodded. "Alright." Then he tried again to look over Lucy to see what she was drawing. "Is that me?" he asked pointing to one of the figures on the paper before she could slap her hand over it.

"_Cal_," she whined. "It's surprise! For Christmas!"

He held up his hands in surrender. "All right. All right." Then he smiled at her and gave it one more try. "It is for me?"

Lucy glared at him and covered it with both her arms again. "Cal, no peeking!"

Cal kissed her hair as he reached for his coat behind her. "I've got to go away for a few days."

Almost instantly, both girl's faces dropped as Gillian appeared in the door way. The news was in no way good or expected. Lucy's big blue eyes dropped to the floor, afraid to openly complain. Emily on the other hand was more used to his sudden business trips.

"Where?" she asked casually, effectively hiding her disappointment from her tone.

"Umm," Cal stalled as he reached into his pocket to be sure his wallet was with him. "Just out of town. I won't be long."

"Well, the Christmas party's in three days. You'll be back for that, right?" Emily continued, looking more vulnerable than she sounded. Already, he was refusing to let himself look at Lucy, knowing she wouldn't be able to hide her emotions as well as Emily and it would break his heart even more.

Instead he straightened his scarf and flickered a smile at Emily. "Oh, I wouldn't miss that for the world, love."

She grinned too. "Liar."

"No, it's uh… fairy lights… and really crappy music and-and good will to all men. Right up my alley," Cal added sarcastically. .

Lucy kept drawing, not looking up at him. "And Santa and family."

Finally he looked down to the mess of brown curls sitting at his desk. "And I wouldn't miss that, Luce," he promised, petting her hair as she looked back up to him. "I'll be back for Christmas."

Gillian inhaled as Lucy nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shirt. Cal picked her up and hugged her for a long moment before looking back at Emily. "Where's your boyfriend, Dick?"

Emily rolled her eyes. "Rick. Funny Dad."

"Uh, did I- did I scare him away, did I?" Cal asked her, a hint of victory on his lips.

"Uh, for your information he went home to study," she fired back with just as much power.

Gillian smiled at the exchange as Cal took out his wallet. "All right. In that case," he counted out a large amount of money and handed it to Emily, even with Lucy still in his arms. "There. Get the best Christmas lights for your tree that money can buy." Then he placed Lucy on the ground and handed several more bills to Emily before looking back to Lucy. "You buy the biggest, prettiest topper for that tree. Make sure Em lets you pick it out. She's a bit of a Christmas hog."

Emily laughed and pushed him as he headed for the door again, giving Gillian one of his classic Cal smiles as though he could handle anything in the world that was thrown at him.

"So where are you going?" Emily asked chasing behind him and holding up the stocking of names.

"I'll only be in Florida," Cal lied, immediately looking away from Emily and pretending to pat his pockets for something then he looked at the stocking. "What happens if I pick myself?" he asked as he reached his hand in.

"Then you put it back and draw again. Besides someone already has you," Emily told him.

"Who?" he asked, getting closer to her and studying her features.

"It's a secret!" Lucy reminded him.

He smiled at her. "Oh, I almost forgot." As he looked at the name in his hand he started laughing. Of course he'd get Loker. Just who he wanted.

"Well, hurry home," Emily told him as Cal hugged her and kissed her cheek. He holds her for several minutes before reaching down and snatching up Lucy.

"You need in on this hug too, don't you luv?" he asked the little girl who immediately snuggled to him.

The hug for a moment longer before Cal hands Lucy off to Emily and looks at both of them. "I love you," he tells them both kissing Lucy's forehead then Emily's cheek again.

"I love you, too," Emily respond automatically as Lucy just nodded as the both hurried to the door.

Lucy beamed at her mother. "We're gunna get stuff for the tree, Momma!"

Emily also looked beside herself as she smiled at Gillian. "This is gonna be the best Christmas party ever!"

The girls were gone before Gillian could even respond. They were too happy, but then again, they didn't realize that person they loved was going to a very unsafe warzone, not Florida. She tugged on her scarf as she looked at him.

"What?" he asked her, obviously not happy.

She shook her head. "You can't go to that place again."

He raced his hand. "I've never been to Afghanistan in my life," he told her matter of factly.

Taking a step toward him and completely removing her scarf she gave him half a smile. "You know what I'm talking about, Cal."

There was a moment that he looked away. Of course he knew what she meant, but this was something bigger than him. "Two missing marines, love."

She moved into him, her head resting on his chest against his pounding heart. She nearly told him their two girls that need him as well, but she knew better. She didn't want to fight with him, she'd wait until he got home for that.

"Fear's healthy," she reminded him softly as he wrapped his arms around her. "Don't forget it."

"Right you are," he replied before pulling her away just enough to look at her. His lips twitched into a grin as he raised an eyebrow. "I'm going off to war, I was hoping for more than a hug."

Of course he could make jokes at times like this. She laughed at him and moved her hands to his face. He needed to shave, but that was another thing that would just have to wait. They held each other's gaze for an extra moment before she went in and kissed him passionately. His arms tightened around her as she smiled into the kiss, nipping at his lower lip and even moaning as his tongue invaded her mouth.

It was one of the best kisses she had ever had. His hand just underneath the back of her shirt, holding her hips in place as she ran her fingers into his hair. When they finally broke apart she could see how dilated his pupils were and feel his arousal.

For a moment he was about to go in to kiss her again, when she turned her head. "You come home and we'll pick up where we left off," she promised, forcing a smile even though she very much wanted to cry.

"Right where we left off?" he waggled his eyebrows.

She laughed at him again. "You come home," she repeated. "We'll pick up where we left off."

He seemed to find this agreeable as he leaned in to peck her lips one more time before heading out the door. "Bye, darling."

For several moments she stood there, leaning against the wall in his office, hoping that everything would go smoothly. That Cal would get there, be able to read the guy with ease and be right back home before she knew it.

Then she sighed, wrapping the scarf around her hand and shaking her head. Sometimes she just wished Cal would say no to people.

_**Hope you guys are like this so far! Please review!**_


	10. Scrooge

Gillian was tired, and sick to her stomach. She was tired of the adrenalin. Unlike Cal, she did not live for the thrill of life and death experiences, especially when she was a world away watching Cal go through it without her.

All she wanted was Cal to get home. She no longer cared about how this case turned out as long as Cal made it back in one piece. The sooner she could get him home and quit lying to Emily the better.

They were so close to done. So close. Cal had made so much progress and they were in the final steps of moving into save the marines.

Gillian chewed on the inside of cheek as she wrapped her arms around herself. She barely nodded as one of the secretaries asked her a question she didn't even catch before heading out the door.

There was an explosion in the background, chopping up the image of Cal as one of the marines shouted out demands. Her stomach tightened as she braced herself between Torres's chair and the desk. All she could think was how he should have been home. He should have said no and stayed with her and the girls.

"That is not Florida," Emily stated in shock as she held Lucy's hand. The little girl stared up at the screen with fear in her eyes as she partially hid her face behind Emily's arm.

Gillian's attention was suddenly split as she straightened up. "Emily-Lucy. How'd you get in here?"

Emily moved closer to the screen, ignoring her question. "You lied to me! He lied to me."

Lucy ran to Gillian and wrapped her arms around her legs. There was another explosion before Gillian could reply, making Lucy hold tighter.

Then Cal's eyes looked back to the screen to see Emily staring at him and Lucy barely watching with her face buried in Gillian's pants legs. He tried to get the ear piece in his ear as the explosions continued. Everyone in the room was looking at him with the truly terrified looks on their faces.

"Dad?" Emily said softly, her voice shaking with fear.

"Emily," he replied. The sound was choppy, but there.

"Dad?" Emily said again, louder this time as Gillian rounded the corner of the desk toward her, Lucy still clinging to her.

They could hear machine gun fire. There was a look of pure terror in Emily's big brown eyes as Gillian supported her with one arm around her and the other holding Lucy. Emily looked at her but noticed Gillian couldn't take her eyes off the screen.

There was another explosion and Emily immediately called out to her father again, even though the screen was nothing but grey and black boxes. Then there was the sound of another, even louder this time. Gillian was just as scared as Emily.

Loker was the first to speak as all of them stared at the grey and black screen, there no image of Cal at all. "Did he just get—"

Gillian spun around and shot him a hellish look, but Emily was already pushing away from here and heading out the door.

"No, no. No he didn't," she stated firmly as she pushed the door open and escaped into the hall.

Gillian handed Lucy to Torres but not before looking the little girl square in the eye and promising she'd be back in a moment. Half a second later she was rushing after Emily, trying to catch up with her and comfort her.

"Emily," she said reaching out to the girl as she tried to disappear into her father's office.

"No! You lied to me! You let me believe he was in Florida," she snapped pulling away from Gillian's touch.

Of course she understood Emily's frustration, but she needed to deal with one problem at a time. "Emily, he didn't want you to worry," she tried, but could see this didn't matter to Emily.

"I'm a big girl, he shouldn't lie to me and you shouldn't help him," she grumbled back as she threw herself down on her father's couch. "I get not telling Lucy, but I'm old enough…" `

Gillian wrapped a comforting arm around Emily's shoulders and was relieved when the girl leaned into her. "Old enough to have your Christmas party ruined because you're worried about your dad?"

The big doe eyes Emily wore so well, looked up at Gillian. "You can't let me feel justified in my anger, can you?" she muttered, making Gillian smile.

"Of course you can justify your anger. He lied, but he did it because he loves you." A hard sigh escaped her chest as she closed her eyes and pulled Emily a little tighter.

Emily studied Gillian for a long moment. She looked tired and though she was trying to hide it, she was just as scared as Emily was. Just as she knew her father held a certain amount of protective responsibility toward Gillian, Gillian held something similar toward him as well. Hers ran a little deeper but sometimes rose to the surface a bit more as well.

Cal would protect Gillian and Lucy until the end of time, Emily knew that. Gillian was well beyond earning a permanent place in her life, even more so now that she and Cal were romantically involved, but Gillian didn't put herself at risk as much as Cal did. Of course she felt her causes were just as important as his, but she couldn't make him worry. Gillian knew what it was like to just stare at the person you care about with your hands completely tied to their fate. One of her worst fears is having to one day tell Emily and Lucy that Cal's luck had finally ran out. That, for once, he was dealt a hand he couldn't win with.

Emily knew that Gillian's responsibility with her and Lucy went beyond what Cal would ever openly ask for. The only other woman in Emily's life that stood close to Gillian was Zoe, but in all fairness they were difficult to compare because they were so different. Zoe may have been her mother but Gillian was like a second mother.

"I'm sorry," Emily said softly resting her head against Gillian's shoulder again. "I shouldn't be mad at you. I'm just scared."

Gillian nodded. "Me too, but we have to believe he's fine. That way I can kill him when he gets home."

That made Emily smile.

For a moment longer Gillian hugged her. "If you want to stay here, I'll talk to Lucy then send her your way. You two can finish decorating the tree."

Again, Emily felt guilty. "I shouldn't have brought her in there."

Gillian just gently cupped Emily's cheek and shrugged. "You were worried. She'll be alright."

With Zoe stuck in Saint Louis, Emily stayed the night with Gillian. She awoke in the middle of the night to her phone buzzing on her bedside table. It took her a moment to even realize that her bed had been invaded by two girls with curly brown hair.

Reaching over the smallest of the two, she grabbed her cell phone and exhaled in relief at the number.

"I could kill you," she told him immediately, sure to keep her voice down so she didn't wake the other two.

"_Good to hear your voice too, luv," _Cal tossed back lightly. At least he tried to sound light. She could hear the exhaustion and sadness in his voice. He wanted to be home too.

Despite it all, she smiled a little. "You have three girls waiting for you to get home, and your ex-wife is snowed in at St. Louis."

"_Well, maybe it is a Merry Christmas after all with the ice queen stuck states away."_ The smile in his voice made her even more hopeful. She missed him, the feeling was even stronger now that she had heard his voice. Of course she had been informed that Cal was alright, but she needed to hear him. Now she need to touch him and be held by him.

"_I need to call Emily, but I think I should wait til the morning. How is she?" _

Gillian glanced to the other side of the bed where the girl was sleeping soundly. "She's about two feet away claiming your pillow."

"_Course she is. Are you in my bed or yours?" _

She smiled to herself. "Mine, but now that you say that I'd rather be in yours. "

"_Soon enough, luv. I promise I'll be at the party tomorrow, just a couple more stops."_

Emily shifted and glanced over at Gillian, her eyes droopy. "Is that Dad?" Gillian nodded as Emily fell back onto the pillow and snuggled under the covers. "Tell him I'm still mad at him, but I'll be mad at him tomorrow."

Gillian ran a hand through her hair as she yawned. "We'll both yell at him tomorrow," she promised Emily as the girl was already falling back to sleep.

Cal could hear how tired she was and wished he was there with them. _"You girls go to sleep. I'll see you soon I promise."_

There was a tired hum from Gillian as she caught a knee to the back from Lucy before the little being snuggled into her side. "Come home soon, okay?" she muttered, realizing how tired she really was.

"_Soon as I can, Gill." _

And for a moment the words nearly slipped out of his mouth. Those three little words that so many men are afraid to say. Not that Cal was necessarily afraid of saying he loved Gillian, but telling her over the phone for the first time wasn't what he wanted.

He slid his phone into his pocket. He'd tell her soon enough.

Gillian wrapped her arm around Lucy's little body and kissed her forehead. Emily started to move, shedding the covers that were around her and stepping onto the floor.

"Where are you going?" Gillian whispered, careful not to wake Lucy.

"Back to the couch, I shouldn't have invaded your bed."

Even in the dark, Gillian could read Emily's features enough to see the embarrassment. The girl was not used to needing comfort from anyone but her father, even if she clearly wanted it now. "You're not invading my bed," Gillian replied lightly. "Come back and lay down, sweetheart."

For half a second, Emily hesitated before shaking her head. "No, I shouldn't. Mom doesn't-"

"I won't say a word," Gillian promised.

Emily looked up at her and then slowly moved back to the bed and crawled back under the covers. She would never admit it, but when her dad first started working with Gillian and Gillian would talk to her and be her friend, she wished she was her mother. Emily loved Zoe. She loved her very much, but Zoe was not as warm. Zoe was all business and a little dry. A hug from Gillian didn't feel like a handshake. A hug from Gillian felt like a weight lifted off her shoulders.

Cal made his grand appearance into the party with Emily under his arm. Lucy went running to him next and he scooped her up. Gillian remained where she was, but their eyes met across the room. Both of them wore gentle smiles. It didn't take a room full of people trained in micro expressions to see that the two people were happy to see each other.

Emily made her way next to Nick as Cal walked with Lucy over to Gillian. Lucy ran to Torres and drug her off somewhere as he took a moment to admire Gillian in her red dress that hugged all the right places before accepting her hug and chaste kiss.

"You okay?" she asked as they held each other a moment longer than usual.

"I don't know," he replied into her hair.

She clung to him like she was afraid something would snatch him away from her again. "Good, you're not meant to be."

Even when they parted, she could help put gently stroke his face. When it feels like she came so close to losing him, she always needed to touch him to make sure he was still there.

"It's going to be alright, darling," he promised, noticing her teary eyes.

She nodded as she bit her lip.

Cal couldn't stand the way she was looking at him. She looked like she was in physical pain. Taking her hand in his, he entwined their fingers. He didn't care who was around at the moment. He didn't care that people didn't know about their relationship, even if it was rumored.

He pulled her closer to him and touched her face. "I'm sorry," he told her.

She laughed at him, but she didn't know why. All it did was make her want to cry more.

"Gillian," he said soberly. His voice so soft she had to really focus to hear him with the commotion of the party going on around them. His hand touched her face as though she was made of glass.

She gasped at his touch, meeting the intensity of his gaze. It was the most intimate look he had ever given her, sharing a part of his soul with her through those beautiful blue eyes.

He wanted to tell her how much he loved her. He wanted to promise her that he'd never hurt her again, but he couldn't. Being a risk taker was just who he was. To the highest extreme, Cal was an adrenalin junky. Someone who risked his life and selfishly thought of himself. He was a big kid with adult responsibilities. Exactly the person Gillian didn't need.

All he wanted to do was tell her he loved her, but he couldn't. The words just refused to come out of his mouth because that would make her stay. That would hold her back. He'd hold her back.

Gillian for a moment felt like she was seeing Cal more deeply than she ever had…

Then suddenly she lost him. There was a block. A shield of self protection over his features that made her want to cry out in frustrations. Instead, she grabbed his hand and squeezed it in a way that made her never want to let go.

"Don't run away from me, Cal," she whispered, to him.

If there wasn't a room full of people she would have kissed him until he couldn't think straight. She knew Cal. She knew this was a sign of him back away.

"Cal," she pleaded softly, her hand grasping his tighter.

Slowly the mask melted away again and he ran his hand into her hair with some force, his lips smashing onto hers. "I love you," he whispered to her as they embraced again.

She buried her face into the crook of his neck. "I love you, Cal," she whispered back.

As she took a step away from him, he noticed the tears hovering in her eyes. She leaned against him as they kept their hands together and looked up at the Christmas tree. It was extremely bright with some of the best lighting Cal had ever seen. There was a lot of Emily in it with touches of Lucy here and there. The biggest piece sitting on top.

It was a glass angle, but it also looked like a china doll. It had feathery wings and a hand painted face. It probably cost a pretty penny, but Cal couldn't help but think the girl had Gillian's taste. Classy and classic, but always stylish.

Lucy bombard him with another hug and he scooped her into his arms, kissing her hair and holding her tight. He held Lucy on his left and his other arm was wrapped around Gillian's waist. Emily talked to Rick and Torres while Loker made himself at home by the food.

Gillian didn't care about the glances they were getting as she rested her head against Cal's shoulder and listened to his heart beat.

"Don't think I haven't forgotten," Cal said slyly when the party had finally ended. Lucy had fallen asleep on Cal's couch and Emily had already headed home.

The office building was empty except for the three of them in Cal's office. Gillian raised her eyebrow at him as she continued to put some leftover food in his private fridge. "I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about."

He tilted his head at her, truly intrigued by the seductive and clever look in her eye as he moved toward her. "Don't you?"

There was a spark in her eye that made him go crazy as she walked backward into his library. "Maybe you should remind me," she purred.

He swallowed hard as her beautiful lips twitched into a smile as her teeth grazed over her own lip. Did she know she was driving him completely bloody mad? There was a slight chuckle from her throat. Of course she did.

Cal moved toward her, closing the door to his library, leaving Lucy in a whole other room. His hands grabbed her tiny hips and pulled her against him. His lips were on her neck in an instant as he walked her back against the latter Emily was sitting on only a moment before.

"Cal," she giggled as he reached for the zipper of her dress. "Here?"

He only hummed against the skin of her neck before pushing her black and red dress to the ground and exploring her perfect body with his lips and hands. She felt to dizzy with excitement to worry about the sturdiness of the latter as his hands left a trail of fire on her skin.

"_Cal_," she moaned closing her eyes and rolling her head back.

He chuckled as he moved back to her lips. "And to think, it's not even quite Christmas yet."

Well, he definitely wasn't a scrooge when it came to the bedroom, or well in this case, the library.

_**I don't know if I want to do a real Christmas chapter or just leave it at this. Well, let me know what you think. **_


	11. Flowers

_I take it you guys didn't like Double Zero, so I thought I'd back track a little and go ahead and do a Christmas scene._

Lucy looked up at the Christmas tree that was standing tall in their living room. There were beautiful cream colored bulbs hanging from the limbs along with tons of other orenments Lucy helped pick out and hang. The lights were a pattern of red, yellow, green, and blue that flickered in a sort of patter. There were red beads and silver garland it as well. It was the first Christmas tree she had ever had in her home and she loved it more than she could openly express. It smelled so good, a scent she never wanted to forget. That's why she had spend every night since they had put it up in the living room, admiring it before it they had to take it down.

Normally Gillian didn't wait until the week before Christmas to decorate the tree, but this had been a particularly crazy year. Lucy didn't seem to mind though, she was just happy to get to do it. She had been watching Christmas movies and asking a million questions about Santa. Gillian could see that Lucy wasn't completely sure about such a man, especially since he somehow missed her in the past, but she tried to be open minded.

The little girl laid on her back with her head just under the limbs of the Christmas tree, staring up through the branches at the lights on them.

Gillian smiled as she entered the room. She had gotten up to check on Lucy to once again find her bed empty and knew exactly where to find her. Lucy's brown curls were sprawled on the floor while mismatched socked feet moved back and forth to a tune she had been humming all day.

Last Christmas she could have never expected her life to look like this. Never in her wildest dreams would she be able to think that the first Christmas after her marriage had crumbled she would believe she could possibly be has happy as she was right then.

Lucy heard Gillian enter the room, but kept staring up at the lights.

"Mommy, how come Santa never came to me before?" Lucy asked again as she turned her head to look up at Gillian through the branches.

Gillian sat the boxes down and rubbed the little girl's socked feet. "Lucy, we've talked about this."

The girl crossed her arms and fiddled with one of the lights on the tree. Her eyes were distant as she turned away from her mother and curled her legs into her stomach. She hadn't even heard of Santa until school. No one believed her when she said she didn't know who he was, then everyone laughed. She was tired of people laughing and teasing her.

Lucy bit her lip and closed her eyes. "I don't want him to miss me again though. I try to be good. You said he only brings presents to good-"

Gillian's heart broke as silent tears ran down the little girl's face. "Sweetheart, you're-"

"Mommy, I don't wanna be bad, I try to be good," Lucy promised not looking at Gillian.

Slowly, Gillian moved closer to her little girl and slowly pulled her out from under the tree.

It was hard to imagine what Lucy was feeling. For a moment Gillian wished she was in the mind of her little darling. Child abuse was something she had so much difficulty understanding. For so long, all Gillian wanted was a baby. Someone that she could love and hold, kiss goodnight and read stories to. That's what Gillian wanted most in life.

It was so difficult for her to understand making a child, a small human being that is the most innocent thing in the world, fear everything around it. To physically beat a child and make it feel like it was nothing, it seemed impossible to imagine.

But now it was her daughter. Someone had hurt her baby girl and more than anything she just wanted to go back in time and save Lucy before all the hurt could begin. That's what she wanted. What she wouldn't give to save Lucy from all the pain she had already gone through.

Gillian held Lucy in her lap, cradling her close and kissing her hair as she closed her eyes. "I love you more than you'll ever know," Gillian whispered against a mess of curls. "And Santa has a load of presents that he will deliver for you tonight, I promise."

Lucy rested her head on Gillian's chest and furrowed her brow. "I'm sorry I make you sad."

The apology broke her heart, but how did someone explain something like that to a child? "Lucy, no. You make me so happy, really happy," Gillian assured her. For a few moments longer, she held Lucy tight on the floor of her living room before setting her up on her feet and giving her a watery smile.

Lucy's big blue eyes looked back at Gillian as Gillian's hand cupper her face. She was nearly six years old and somehow could see a whole different world. Yet the world she was being offered, the world Gillian was trying to give her, was so utterly foreign that it made her nervous. It seemed too good to be true to. For a little girl to think anything was too good to be true was just sad.

Gillian rubbed her nose against Lucy's and tried to give her the most genuine smile she could muster up. "I love you _so_ much."

Lucy snuggled into Gillian and closed her eyes, a small crease in her forehead never relaxing. "I love you too, Mommy."

Those words should never sound sad.

Especially not on Christmas Eve.

She looked at the little girl who's head rested against her shoulder. "What do you say you open one present tonight?" she offered trying to brighten Lucy's eyes a little.

Lucy looked skeptically at Gillian. "But it's not even Christmas yet."

Gillian shrugged. "How about you open one present tonight and save the rest for tomorrow? It can be like a new tradition," she suggested. "One for you and me."

Lucy smiled. "Okay. Somethings just for you and me."

Getting to her feet, Gillian looked around at the wrapped presents on the floor. There were dozens of them. Some of them were more finely wrapped than others because Lucy wanted to help, but they were definitely wrapped with love. Finally, Gillian reached down to a smaller box and handed it to Lucy.

Lucy looked at it for a long time, before turning it over and undoing the tape at the bottom. Slowly she began to unwrap the paper, trying not to tear it. When the sound of the smallest rip caught both their attention and Lucy nervously looked up at Gillian.

"Rip it open," Gillian encouraged with a smile, pulling the little girl back into her lap and watching over her shoulder.

The sound of giggles and ripping wrapping paper changed the atmosphere in the room to a much more Christmassy one. When all the paper was torn away and discarded to the floor, Lucy got really quiet. "For me?" Lucy asked, holding a grey and black stuffed cat. She nuzzled her face into the fur and gave Gillian a big smile.

"That's just one of the presents, there are more tomorrow," Gillian replied.

Just then there was a knock on the door, followed by the sound of footsteps.

"I smell cookies," Cal called. In a heartbeat Lucy was off of Gillian's lap running toward the foyer.

Laughing, Gillian also got to her feet. "You're supposed to knock then wait for me to open the door," she told him as he came around the corner, holding Lucy in his arms. "Not knock and use your key."

Cal leaned in and kissed her lips. "Less work for you, love." Gillian smiled as she connected their lips again. She loved the way he was smiling and how he tasted like mint tea.

"Cal, look what Mommy let me open!" Lucy announced from between them, earning their attention.

The grey and white kitten was held up with pride as Lucy gave the man who she loved like a father examined it. "You got to open a present early? It's not even Christmas."

Lucy pulled the kitty into her and looked to her mother for help. The line on her forehead and her oblique eyebrows told her that she was nervous, afraid she broke a rule. It only hit Cal a moment later that he had done something wrong and immediately tried to fix it.

Gillian was already kneeling in front of the little girl. "It's okay, sweetheart. Cal's just playing."

Big blue eyes looked up at him as she moved into her mother. "Mommy said I could open one…"

Cal never let his regret show, even though Gillian knew that he felt guilty about upsetting the child. There was something about how Cal looked at Lucy that took away any worry Gillian could ever think of having about him not loving her. It was no different than the way he looked at Emily when she little. He didn't care that Lucy was not his child or even biologically Gillian's, she was one of the handful of people he held very closely to his heart, right by Gillian and Emily.

"Mummy here is bendin' the rule on Christmas," Cal pretended to surprised. "What a rule breaker."

Gillian leaned against him and Lucy hugged her new stuffed animal tight. "I gots to go to sleep so Santa will come, right Cal?"

Cal scooped up the girl again as she giggled joyously. "Yes! That means bedtime!"

Gillian watched as Cal tickled the girl and carried her up the steps to her bedroom.

"Wait, Cal!" Lucy demanded, wiggling free from his grip. "I got to tell Mommy goodnight!"

The little feet raced down the steps and sprung into her mother's arms. "Goodnight, Mommy," the little girl said softly holding tightly to Gillian's neck.

"Goodnight," Gillian replied setting the girl back on the floor. "Love you."

The little girl kissed her mother's cheek and smiled at her. "Love you too…" Then she hesitated. "Thank you for my kitty. I'm gunna call her Flowers."

Gillian almost laughed at the name, but before she could ask the reason behind it, Lucy wrapped her arms around Gillian's legs in another hug. "And thank you for being my mommy."

The girl released her hold and sprang back toward Cal with Flowers dangling from her hand. Gillian wished that she could have spent Lucy's first Christmas with her, and she had only realized she was.

She could hear Cal's animations of some story as Gillian poured herself a glass of wine and took a seat on the couch. For a moment she contemplated calling her mother, but didn't want her mood to be ruined by her mother's criticism of her life choices or of Lucy. Instead, she sat quietly in the living room, the only light being from the Christmas tree.

Cal smiled as he stopped on the steps and looked over at her. She had this sort of peaceful look on her face. Her brow wasn't furrowed with worry like it so often was, nor her lips pursed as they were when she was in deep thought about work. For once, she looked content.

Coming up behind her, he ran his strong hands down her back and sat down. She leaned against him, sighing deeply.

"Lucy made Santa cookies," she told him offhandedly. "Triple chocolate."

He chuckled. "Mrs. Claus's favorite."

Of course she smirked. "I may have given her the idea."

"And assisted her, I hope. The house is still standing."

"She's attentive for her age."

"And a prodigy baker," he added fishing a cookie off the plate nearby and taking a bite. "Emily's come over tomorrow morning with present for you and Lucy. From her specifically, I was forced to by yours myself."

Gillian smiled and leaned deeper into him. She inhaled and let him wrap his arms around her. "Merry Christmas, Cal."

He closed his eyes and held her tight. "Merry Christmas."

_**Now if you want the Double Zero chapter back, I'll repost it so let me know. I hope you enjoyed a little dash of Christmas in April! Please review. **_


	12. Double Zero

Las Vegas. Something that could change Cal into a completely different person and made Gillian extremely nervous. She was stuck in Nevada, across the country from her little girl and already missing her like crazy. Not to mention there was a leggy blonde hitting on Cal like he was a piece of meat, sending him looks that he would kill a man for looking at her that way, and he was allowing it to happen. Plus a rich playboy trying to get a glimpse up her skirt.

She was not happy camper. And if Cal told her she was smothering one more time she was going to get a separate hotel room and maybe even hotel, or hell, she may actually smother him with his own pillow. It was already a pretty fair guess that Cal would be sleeping on the pullout couch in the suite tonight.

She gave him a warning look as she walked by the table of professional poker players. One of the men called out to her as she did and she heard Cal snap at him.

"Oi, she's too good for you," Cal snapped ready to break the man's hand if he dared to touch her.

Finally, something to make Gillian smile. Perhaps the first thing that made her even close to happy since she stepped foot off the plane. Of course it was just as quickly ruined by the blond that kept her trip on quite the damper.

"By the way she walks, she's too good for anybody," the leggy blond, whom Gillian still decided it wasn't work knowing her name, retorted.

PDA was not Gillian's thing. It wasn't. Neither was petty cat fights or arguing with women who didn't matter, but every now and then something pushed her over the edge. Vegas had an effect on everyone.

Turning a little Gillian locked eyes with Cal. It interested him when he realized that he couldn't read her expression. There was definitely a fire in her eyes, a bit of orneriness and even anger, but he couldn't read her mind.

She spun on her high heels, keeping the exact posture she held when she was walking earlier. "Cal, can I speak with you a moment?"

His brow furrowed but the threat in her eyes silenced him and got him to his feet. He met her around the table, about ten feet away from the other players. He raised his brow at her as her features were concentrated and professional.

"I've sent the video feed to Torres and Loker," she replied casually. "After you're done here, what do you say we go out and grab a bite to eat?"

There was a flash of electricity in her eyes that made him smirk. Was that jealousy he saw brewing underneath the surface of his calm and collect Gillian Foster? It certainly looked like jealousy, but he wasn't completely sure. He had two choices here: test his theory and possibly piss her off even more, or just go with it. Cal liked testing theories.

"Well, I planned on interviewing each of them separately. Poppy asked me if I'd join her for drinks," Cal replied, watching Gillian's lips for the sign of contempt.

She allowed him nothing. She knew he was looking for it and she refused it to him. "Fine. Why don't you just stay in Poppy's room tonight?" she muttered at him.

It was then that he realized his attempt at making her mad hurt her more than he expected. Did she really think he'd choose _anyone_ over her? Now he felt like an ass, but he was still curious as to why she felt so threatened by this woman. A woman like Gillian shouldn't feel threatened by anyone.

"Hey, Gill, I'm not going with her," he told her, contradicting himself. "I'll take you out tonight. Show you the town, since I haven't seen it in a while I mean. Being banned an all."

Half her mouth twitched upward for a second. At least she liked the last bit. He kissed her quickly. "Why don't you call and check on Lucy?"

Now Gillian actually let herself really smile and roll her eyes. "I don't know how you convinced Zoe to let Lucy stay with her on such short notice." Actually, she couldn't believe that she let her daughter stay with Cal's ex-wife. Granted Emily was the one that was actually watching her, but it was still Zoe's home.

"Emily's doing. She may have a promising career as a lawyer, as much as I'd love to see her follow her mother's footsteps," Cal replied with a bit of an eye roll.

Gillian nodded then gave him another brief kiss. It took more strength than she would have liked to admit to not look over and see Blondie's face, but she was more of a lady than that. She didn't want to make it any more obvious that she was reinforcing the fact she had a claim on Cal. God forbid the woman ignore it.

Still, later, she realized that Poppy Wells (the only reason she decided it important to learn her name was if she had to give her name to the police later) was not about to back off Cal. One of the final straws was when Poppy propped her feet on Cal's leg where the whole room has a pretty straight shot up her dress, especially Cal.

She was an expert liar, daring Cal to see through her poker face. Of course Poppy was tempting to Cal. She was roulette. Pure luck and chance, plus she was what any guy would want; blond, busty and willing. Yes, she felt threatened, but she didn't dare admit it. That's why she was extremely grateful for the break from her.

So instead of fighting back, she got quiet. It also didn't help that he called her smothering again. When she was trying to comfort him, he shied away from her touch and may have even glared at her. She didn't let her hurt show.

Las Vegas brought out a different side of Cal and she was slowly starting to hate it. As she inhaled, she caught a glimpse of Poppy sitting in the stands behind him, waiting for her chance to swoop in and impress him with her slutty clothing and daring eyes.

"Gambles…" she muttered making a glance toward the stands. Cal looked followed her gaze and then saw the almost sad tight smile on Gill's face. "She's roulette."

_And I'm just poker, _Gillian mentally added. _A game you already know how to win and can do it every time._

Cal's eyes narrowed and his brow furrowed. "You're worried I can't resist." It wasn't a question, and it was just a statement. "Roulette."

Gillian couldn't look at him to confirm his suspicion..

He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. So he didn't say anything at first. He slipped his hand into hers and put his other on her face. For a long moment he just looked at her, studying her beautiful features.

"Why would I ever want anyone that wasn't you? Roulette or not."

With that he kissed her lips and smiled against them. "I'd put my money on you."

Even if they ended up not going out and spending the whole night in the suit, not that either was complaining, Gillian was very glad to put their case behind them. So happy in fact, she decided to embrace Vegas a little.

Cal was already out, and she wanted to surprise him. Her hair was curled perfectly, her sparkling, single strap, black dress hugging her body that showed a class amount skin and a teasing amount of leg. She strapped on a pair of heels she had bought specifically for the dress, also be sure she was exactly eye level with Cal. She dabbed on her pale pink lip stick and glossed them over to make them shine. She looked good, if she did say so herself.

Just then, her phone rang and she smiled when she saw who was calling.

"Hello, sweetheart," Gillian greeted, turning slightly to examine her body in the full length mirror. Tonight was going to be fun. She planned on teasing and pushing limits until she drove him completely insane. Wait all night, making him really want it…

"_Dad behaving himself in Vegas?"_ Emily asked, she could tell she was on speaker phone.

"I've had to push him back in line a few times," Gillian replied. "How's Lucy?"

"_Still in the hotel room? I'll bring up the video chat."_

Gillian opened her laptop and opened link to Emily's invite. As soon as she saw the image of Lucy with chocolate ice cream on her face, she smiled even bigger. "You girls look like you've had some fun."

"_Ice cream!"_ Lucy cheered happily. "_Zoe got it for us."_

She tried to hide it, but Gillian was actually pretty impressed. So maybe Zoe wasn't her biggest fan, but she seemed to be perfectly content with Lucy as a house guest. Emily on the other hand was handing over baby wipes as she examined Gillian.

"_You look nice," _she said almost suspiciously.

Lucy wiped her mouth and nodded as well. _"Pretty."_

"_Hot actually," _Emily corrected. _"You going out tonight?"_

Gillian laughed. "Yes, with your father, don't worry."

Emil grinned. _"I wasn't."_

Lucy looked tired, even on the screen. Gillian was very good at picking out her little habits she had when she was fighting the urge to go to bed, like rubbing her eyes or playing with the tips of her hair. Both of which she was doing right then.

"Isn't it getting close to bed time, little bit?" she asked giving her little girl a small smile and wanting to snuggle her already.

Lucy pouted and rested her head on Emily's shoulder._"You'll be home tomorrow, right Mommy?"_

All Gillian wanted to do was cuddle her little girl and tuck her into bed, kiss her forehead and see her in the morning. That would come tomorrow. She'd be able to do all that tomorrow.

"I'll be home tomorrow," Gillian promised partially wishing she was there now. She took a moment to look at the clock. It was already going on nine. "It's time for you to go to bed, baby. Be good for Emily and Zoe."

Lucy nodded sadly. "Goodnight, Mommy."

Emily wiggled her fingers. "See ya tomorrow, Gill."

Gillian blew them both a kiss and headed for the door.

As Gillian walked through the casino, her eyes fell on a roulette table. Cal was standing there, sliding a million dollars worth of chips onto the roulette table. She suddenly felt extremely ill. She rushed over to his side and grabbed his arm.

He looked up at her knowingly. "Hey Gill," he said casually as though he wasn't potentially throwing away enough money to retire on. "You look good," he added wrapping his arm around her waist and nuzzling his face into her neck and kissing a particularly delicious spot.

She couldn't watch. She closed her eyes and sucked in a hard breath as she heard the ticking of the wheel as the ball rolled.

"Double zero," Cal whispered as Gillian inhaled.

"You're not so lucky number," she muttered as the wheel continued to spin.

"I've pressed my luck before," he teased, running his hand across her back and lowering his hand. She reached back and raised his hand from her butt back to her back.

"And lost."

Biting her lower lip, she heard the rolling slow and she shook her head. There was no hope in them winning. None. Cal never won roulette.

This was no exceptions.

"TWENTY-SIX!"

Gillian dropped her head into Cal's shoulder. She wasn't sure if she wanted to kill him or just dismiss it as one of Cal's isms. Throwing away money that could save _their _business. It was easy to be mad at him, especially with the way this case had gone, but she didn't want to be.

The cheers around the table made her turn her attention to a young boy probably on his twenty-first birthday according to his pin on his shoulder. She shook her head as she wrapped her arm around Cal's waste.

"What happens in Vegas," she muttered.

Cal grabbed her hand and drug her away from the crowd. "Now that my fun's done." She stumbled as they made it to the entrance of the hotel. "I'm about to give you the time of your life…"

He motioned to the limo with a certain pride on Cal could hold with an odd amount or cuteness. Of course she wanted to jump into the limo and enjoy her last night on the town, but she really just had one thing on her mind.

"Cal." She looked at him, her eyes wide with nerves. "Can we just go home?"

Vegas was not her city, he could see that. He knew she had been struggling with herself since the moment they got there. They had been there a handful of days, days she's been away from her daughter, and he knew that if she saw Poppy Wells one more time in her lifetime, a very well put together Gillian Foster may come unglued.

So, he agreed. "Let's go home."

Private jets from Las Vegas were very nice. Granted Renold's won't be happy to know that he's going to have to take Southwest back. Hopefully he can get a seat in First Class.

Gillian fell asleep with her head resting on Cal's chest with his arm around her shoulders, but the moment they landed, Gillian was way too happy to hand Cal her keys and make it to Zoe's place at just past three-thirty in the morning.

Cal at least had the courteously to let Zoe know before they took off that they'd be stopping by in the middle of the night. There was no way that Gillian was going to just go home until Lucy woke up when she hadn't seen her in days.

Quietly, Cal unlocked the door with his spare key and let Gillian in. She knew exactly where she was going and was even more thankful that Zoe had packed Lucy's bags and left them by the door, making it a lot easier on them.

Gillian softly turned the doorknob to Emily's bedroom to find Lucy cuddling with her stuffed puppy she had gotten for Christmas. It was already extremely dirty from being drug everywhere but it just made Gillian happier that the little girl loved it so much.

A little sound came from Lucy's mouth as Gillian softly scooped her off the bed and let her snuggle into her shoulder. Stirring a little more as Gillian carried her out the door, with a blanket tight around her, Lucy woke up just enough to realize who was carrying her.

"Mommy?" she muttered sleepily when Gillian started buckling her into her booster seat.

"Go back to sleep, baby doll." Gillian whispered back as Cal tossed the bags in the back.

"I missed you," Lucy yawned. "You and Cal…"

Gillian smiled as she pressed her lips to the little girl's forehead. "Not as much I missed you."

That night, when they finally arrived back at Gillian's home, Gillian and Cal laid in bed together as Lucy slept in her bedroom a few doors down. It was so nice to be home, but at the same time Gillian was stuck somewhere else. She was stuck on who Cal had become when he was in that city, tossing around money and beautiful women.

That wasn't the real Cal, was it? She had known him for years, and every time Vegas got involved it became like Cal and Zoe's marriage; somehow it hurt everyone within ear shot, especially those who care about him.

Vegas. Sin city.

"I did it for a reason," Cal told her, surprising her that he was even still awake. "I put it all on double zero for a reason."

Gillian smirked. "Oh yeah, what would possess you to put a million dollars on a number that never wins?

Cal smiled a sleepy smile as he kept his eyes closed. "With roulette I'm all in. That's the way it goes. It's the risk that thrills me. Putting money on the line."

Gillian just kept watching him. "Poppy plays poker for a reason. Like all, she has a tell, boring game that one. It's fun for a while but you get bored once you learn it. You though, you're a game I haven't quite figure out all the way yet. You're not roulette, but you're a whole thing in and of yourself, love. But I put it all in on you, double zero, and I think I won."

For a moment, Gillian was expecting him to add a sarcastic comment to ruin the moment or at least make the knot in her throat and tears in her eyes at bay. Instead, he ran his hand down her side and held her a little closer.

"Cal…" She wanted to tell him that she loved him, but her main focus was not crying at the moment.

"So I choose you, every time. Double zero, love. Double zero."

**So! Great news! Due to a small bout with insomnia last night, I am 90% done with the next chapter. I'm tempted to wait a couple days to post it though. I will give you a small peek at what's to come: Doyle... Muwhahaha**


	13. Pieces Put Together

It was just past three o'clock on a Friday and everyone was ready for the weekend. Cal was going away and Emily was bringing Lucy to the office before they headed out of town. They were okay. They were together. The girls were on their way and everything was going to be fine. That's what she kept telling herself. The nerves that twisted in her stomach and made her hands sweat were driving her in sane. She just had to talk to Cal and tell him what she heard, calm down and talk to Cal.

But he just kept ranting. Of course he didn't want Emily to go to Berkeley. Three thousand miles away was _way _too far for his little girl and they were supposed to be flying out in a matter of hours to tour the college.

He was packing up his things, carrying on how it was too far away. Emily was suppose to be meeting them there with Lucy but now they were running behind and Cal couldn't even find his ID. Gillian knew this was not going to be good.

But Gillian wasn't thinking about Cal's problems, her mind was somewhere else.

She was scared. The kind of fear that keeps you up at night and takes away your appetite. He could read it all over her features and his forehead creased with concern.

"What's the matter?"

A hard breath exhaled from Gillian's lips. "Remember Henry Andrews?"

A man from both of their pasts, hopefully long forgotten, but of course they weren't so lucky. "Pentagon, 2003, why?" he replied quickly wondering what this had to do with anything.

She swallowed, stress tensing her neck as she did so. "He just called. He wants to tell you the truth about the whole Jimmy Doyle business, face to face."

Jimmy Doyle. That's a name he hasn't heard in years, but then again so was Henry Andrews. Jimmy Doyle, a man known to be a terrorist that lost his wife and young daughter because of a call Cal had made.

It was a moment from the past that haunted them both for different reasons. Cal never justified killing a child and the girl was even his daughters age at the time.

He could see Gillian was almost ill with worry. Of course she was. She knew better than anyone what this did to him.

"That was seven years ago," Cal stated, taken back a bit. "He wants to come clean about that now?"

Gillian shrugged and looked desperate. "He was ten minutes away when he called."

"Well, I got to be at the airport in about ten minutes," Cal responded as if that was the end of that. But before he could get another word out, there was a loud explosion and the room shook.

Gillian lost her footing and stumbled as Cal moved to her quickly. His arms were already around her as they both looked toward the window. "What was that?" she muttered, Cal holding her to him with his usual protectiveness.

The power went off as car alarms blared. Even though they couldn't see anything yet, the smell of gasoline and fire began to creep into the air. They ran to the window to see a car in ruins as fire roared from its windows. Surrounding cars were damaged and people were injured.

"Emily and Lucy," Gillian gasped her heart stopping.

The girls could be out there somewhere in the crowd. They could be hurt and probably scared to death.

Cal and Gillian both retreated from the window, reaching for their cell phones. Sirens were around sounding and Gillian felt even sicker with worry for her girls-er- their girls. Cal's Emily and her Lucy. Cal was calling Emily's phone as Gillian paged the front desk to see if they had arrived yet.

"The bloody phones aren't working!" Cal grumbled but dialed the number again.

Their heart stopped again at Torres's desperate calls. "Someone help! Please! I need a little help here!"

Both of them stopped what they were doing, stuffing their phones in their pocket and racing to see Loker stumbling in covered in blood. For a moment Gillian couldn't help but selfishly be glad it wasn't Lucy and Emily. Still the _it was just Loker _thought made her feel extremely guilty.

Gillian and Torres went to either side of him, supporting him as he panted and Cal just watched. "There was a man in that car and he's in… he's dead… he…"

Torres looked more horrified than anyone and Gillian tried to be the rational one. "He's in shock," she stated quickly, guiding him by the arm to the break room, but still tossed a look over her shoulder. "Cal, keep trying Emily."

Cal nodded, already pulling his phone out and hitting redial. She would help Loker if Cal kept trying to get in touch with the girls.

Gillian cleaned the wounds and applied bandages to Loker's face as Torres got more supplies. Cal kept trying to reach Emily, his stomach hollowing at the idea of the girls getting caught in the blast as well. The only reason he wasn't down there right then was because he knew he wouldn't be able to make it through the crowd.

Anna appeared in the doorway. "Doctor Lightman?" He met her in the hallway as she offered him a large envelope. "This just came for you. The man said it was urgent."

Without a second thought, Cal ripped it open. CDs. CDs? No. Recordings… He turned back to Gillian. She was trying to stay focused on Loker though her worry for Emily and Lucy was making her hands tremble. Motherly, she instructed Loker to drink some water before catching Cal's eye. The look concerned her, but it wasn't about the girls so she wasn't concerned enough to keep her focus on him.

"What man?" Cal demanded suddenly. "What did he-when did he come?"

Anna was already flustered by the explosion and Cal's aggressive behavior shook her even more. "Um, just before it… he said no matter what happened next you need to open this."

"What did he look like?" Cal demanded again, this time less forcefully.

Anna tried to remember. "He was wearing a hat, sunglasses- it was really quick. I was just about to go to lunch. If I hadn't had to stay for this, I could—"

Cal suddenly felt bad for upsetting the girl. He didn't mind giving his associates a hard time, but Anna an assistant who he never had problems with.

"Yeah, I know." He grabbed his phone. "Here's Emily's number. I want you to call her. You get her on the phone, you come and find me. Alright, darling?"

Anna nodded and hurried away before anything more could happen.

Cal exhaled and rubbed a hand over his face. This was a nightmare. The radio reported a car bomb that killed an unidentified man instantly. He had a pretty fair idea of who the man was. So did Gillian. The look they exchanged told Torres as much.

"What is that?" she questioned looking between her bosses.

Gillian casted her eyes down, not wanting to share while Cal pulled Torres off focus. "All right. What's important to us right now is talking to Emily and Lucy. So make him comfortable and give him some tea."

Gillian stood up to follow him and Cal was suddenly nervous for her. She looked nearly faint. He really didn't need her passing out right then either.

Torres didn't back down so easily though. "No, no, no. You know something about this bomb or at least you think you do."

She stormed after them but stopped at the door, not wanting to leave Loker.

"It's got to be gridlock out there," Gillian reasoned. "Em and Luce are probably stuck in it."

That was his Gillian, the optimist, she needed to stay that way. Lucy and Emily are fine and everything was going to be okay.

Okay, well, Cal wasn't an optimist. Cal was a sadistic realist who knew this wasn't good.

"Say it," he demanded. "Go on. You can say it. Gillian, say it. Doyle is back, he killed Andrews, I'm next."

It sounded matter of factly, empty from all emotion. Now, more than ever, Gillian just wanted to slam her fists down and cry. He showed her the tape of his psych evaluation from 2003 as well as the typed message threatening to give Doyle the other five tapes of their sessions. Someone was blackmailing him and she was ill.

This was seven years ago but as they listened to it, it felt like it was yesterday. She swore that she didn't know the sessions were being recorded, but she also admitted that the possibility did cross her mind, being in the pentagon and all. Still, she was hurt that he accused her of knowing and being a part of it.

Jimmy Doyle had to be behind this. Torres and Loker had stormed into Cal's office not long after they arrived. They were demanding answers and Cal gave them bits and pieces as Gillian just watched him.

Torres looked at her. "You ok, Foster?" She sounded genuinely concerned.

Slowly turning away from Cal, Gillian spoke a single cold line. "Everything's fine." It was the driest anyone in the room had ever heard her speak. All emotions were gone and it was like some robot had taken over.

Before much more could be said, Emily's voice called from the hallway. "Dad?"

She and Lucy both rushed into the room. Lucy running to her mother and Emily to her father.

"Where have you been? I was worried sick," Cal demanded, hugging her tightly.

"We got stuck out in the mess with everyone else," she told him. She sounded close to tears and Gillian gave her a comforting smile.

Lucy held tight to Gillian's neck, trembling still. The poor darling was scared out of her mind. "There was a really loud boom and then people started running into us…"

Guilt flooded Emily's eyes and suddenly Gillian wanted to hug her too. "All these people were running and somehow I lost Lucy and I couldn't find her for a second."

Cal gave Emily another squeeze at the sound of true sorrow in her voice. "But she found me really fast," Lucy assured everyone. "I didn't really know she was gone…"

Poor was more torn up about briefly losing Lucy than the actual explosion that could have actually hurt them. Cal couldn't help but think Emily sometimes took after Gillian with her protective side. She had a very big heart that he couldn't take credit for giving her and was pretty sure Zoe's was way too iced over to have ever been that warm.

Gillian pulled Emily close to her, holding Lucy with her right and hugging Emily with her left. "You're both safe, that's all that matters."

Emily hugged Gillian back and nodded. She wiped her tears with the back of her hand as she took a deep breath before looking around the room that was filled to the brim with hostility. "What's going on?"

Loker showed obvious contempt as he stepped closer to Cal. "That's what we all want to know," he said accusatory.

Gillian held Lucy tight, her eyes narrowing at him. Even she couldn't hide her own disapproval for Loker as he was ready to attack them both when they had finally gotten their children back. She needed time hug her little girl and take a deep breath.

"Loker, look, you know, I'm sorry about what you just went through," Cal said obviously controlling his tone. "But right now I need a moment with my daughter. After that, I'll figure out how I'm going to use you guys on this. That's how it works so end of conversation. All right?"

Cal turned his back toward Loker and faced Emily again and Gillian was glad he said exactly what she was thinking. She set Lucy on the ground and kneeled in front of her, but before Gillian could even ask if she was alright, Loker jumped in again.

"That was a conversation?"

Gillian had enough. "Loker, get the hell out," she snapped looking past Lucy and glaring at Loker in such a way that no one had ever seen from her before, not even Cal. But at this moment she cared more about checking on her daughter and keeping everyone safe than Loker's precious feelings.

Everyone stared at her for a moment but Torres took the moment to usher Loker out. Cal looked at Emily who seemed to be trying to stay strong. "How are you doing?" he asked her. Her gaze shifted from his as tears began to prick at her eyes again. "I'm sorry about Berkeley," he offered pathetically. "All right, we'll do that another weekend. We'll do it soon, I promise. But right now I need you to do me a favor. Do you have a friend you can stay a day or two with? Take Lucy too?"

Emily thought for a moment. "Can it be a boy?"

Well… that threw his focus suddenly. "Second thought you two will go to Torres's."

Gillian tried to go after him. She tried to convince him to drop it. To ignore it. To stay with them, but she couldn't. All she could do for the moment was tell Lucy to listen to Emily and try to think. She had called Cal several times only to find out Anna still had his phone. She had to keep Cal from getting hurt… she had to keep him alive.

She thought about those meetings. The information he told her. But other than that, the spark he had in the years before. The guilt that Cal held for the death of Doyle's family was the spark that ignited a flame that started the forest fire to the truth.

She reached into her bag and pulled out her private laptop. She had saved emails from years ago that discussed Cal with Henry Andrews, the man that had been killed in the car explosion. She needed to remember all of it clearly. Every detail possible.

The cover up story of Doyle family was what kept Cal alive. Why did no one else see that? She protected him. She protected Zoe and Emily. Before she ever truly knew him, she had to do what was right for him. Even if she didn't know why.

Anna had let her know that Cal had just come in and headed toward the Cube. She was on her feet in seconds to hunt him down. As she opened the door to the lab, her jaw nearly dropped to see Doyle standing in the cube and Cal waiting on her.

It wasn't even whited out. Doyle watched her as she stormed around to Lightman. Her mouth was tight as she glared at Cal. "What's this?" she snapped.

"This is Jimmy Doyle," Cal responded, completely expecting her rage.

"I know who it is," she hissed back her words like daggers. Anyone else would have flinched, but Cal had expected her rage.

"He's not a threat to us. Unless I fail to do right by him."

Gillian's eyebrows went up in surprise. "Do right by him?" she glanced at Doyle then back to Cal. He had a busted nose and his cheek looked like he had been dragged across rough concrete. "Who did that to your face?" she asked, gently touching his chin.

Cal ignored her even though she was still fuming. Her hands were even warm with her blood pressure.

"Are you going to tell me what that man is doing here? While your daughter and my daughter are both sitting in your library?" she asked instead.

If there was something Cal was beginning to realize, mother bear Gillian was a force to be reckoned with. He could see she felt protective over him and both their children but also extremely vulnerable and afraid. Part of him felt guilty, it was normally his job to protect her.

"Well, this is our one chance to right a huge wrong that we both played a part in," he told her finally.

Gillian looked him square in the eye. She needed him to understand. "You are not to blame for the murders of that man's family, Cal." But she needed him to start thinking responsibly for theirs.

That struck a nerve. Now he was just angry. Where was his Gillian? His soft and kind Gillian that wanted the truth just as much as he did. Not this woman who had a set glare on her face even when she was trying to be comforting. "I'm not talking about the murders. Actually I'm talking about the cover-up afterwards." He stared into her soul. "I mean, me, that's one thing, but you… you're way better than that. Which something that's been bothering me for a long time."

He could see her eyes soften to guilt and sadness, but she kept his gaze.

"Whatever it is that you're hiding from me, I forgive you," he added.

But Gillian shook her head. "I have never hidden anything from you, Cal." She stared at him. "Let it go."

Cal just looked at her. "Why don't you ask Doyle about Andrews? Cause I've always valued your opinion." His voice was dripping with sarcasm and he was daring to piss her off even more than she already was.

Her eyes were set on his but she pushed past him and opened the door. She started at the man. Her fingers twitched as she shifted her weight to one hip and stood aggressively before the man she knew as a terrorist.

"Jimmy Doyle, Gillian Foster," Cal introduced when he realized this was going to be like pulling teeth.

Doyle offered his hand out to her and she just stared at him, making it obvious that she was not there to be his friend. "What are you making him do?" she demanded.

"I just need to find my wife and daughter's killer," Doyle responded honestly.

"To avenge them." It wasn't a question but it was still validated but the almost nod Doyle gave her. She turned to Cal. "Are you prepared to hunt and kill another man?" Cal didn't answer but he didn't have to. "I don't believe that. Even if he does have a gun to your head."

"You know, seven years ago, I help murder this man's wife and child. Now I would like to know exactly who it was that I helped." Cal stared at Gillian. He didn't understand why it was so difficult for her to understand.

Finally, Gillian looked back at Doyle and took a seat at the table infront of them. "Why now?"

"Why now what?" Doyle replied honestly confused.

"Kill Andrews?"

Doyle shook his head. "I didn't kill Andrews. I just talked to the man."

Suddenly Gillian was taken back. She didn't expect him to tell the truth. She glanced at Cal to see if he got a read on a lie, but the look her gave her told her that he saw the same thing.

"Then why wait seven years to come back and do any of this?"

"When Mary and Bernadette were murdered, I died that day too. I went from grief to drink, drugs, you name it."

Gillian tossed this information aside without an ounce of empathy toward him. "You were a member of a terrorist organization. God knows how many lies you've ruined, so, please."

Cal stared at her. He was sick of this, they were getting nowhere. "Bloody hell!" he rolled his eyes and took over. "How did you track Andrews down?"

"Got his name from the lawyer who represented the two junkies he framed for the murder of my girls." His eyes bore into Gillian's but she stayed cold.

"Who is he?" Cal demanded. "Where is he?"

Gillian sat in her office, her hands covering her eyes. Everything that happened… it was like being face with skeletons from the past over and over again. It felt good to give Doyle justice, even if it wasn't the just he had intended, but at the same time she felt so sick to her stomach.

Cal would have protected her. If the situations were switched, she would have liked to believe that Cal would have done the same. Whether it was true of not, she would have liked to believe that Cal would have saved her from more pain like she tried to do with him.

A little girl died seven years ago.

Cal walked into her office. He stood there, looking at her but she felt inferior. She felt like she had let him down.

"Were you ever going to tell me?" he asked her. In truth his tone was soft, but it still brought tears to her eyes. She stood up and paced for a moment before finally turning to him.

The simple answer was no. She was never going to tell him that she was the one that got him fired from the pentagon by labeling him as incompetent due to stress and anxiety to keep the cover up a cover up so no one would get hurt.

But that wouldn't satisfy him. "He came to me in the middle of the night. Before our first session. Not to my office, to my house." She shook her head. "My house…" she whispered. It was something that still haunted her. "I'd never seen him before and I never saw him again. He told me to do what I had to do to keep you quiet, or Doyle wouldn't be the only man to lose his wife and daughter."

The tears were barely at bay now and Cal watched as Gillian told this secret for the first time. It must have been the most difficult thing she ever had to do.

Her lip pouted as kept fighting the tears. "If I told you that, it would have been proof positive of a cover up and you would have never let it go."

She tried to read Cal's face but she couldn't. Tears were blurring her vision and emotions clouding her mind. Taking a step toward him she held her hands out toward him. "So… I couldn't let you do that." The first tear fell from her eye. "To you, your family. You'd never have gotten to blow the whistle. He would have cut you down before you put it to your lips."

"So all that talk about you being a bad liar, it's just an act, right? That's a lie." Cal examined her features and more shame flooded them, but so did determination.

"Depends on the lie," she whispered in reply.

For a moment there was silence as she begged him to understand. She loved him so much and she couldn't imagine losing him. But if there was a reason for him to walk away, this was it.

Finally, he took a step toward her, wrapping his arms around her as she clung to him. Tears rolled down her cheeks. She exhaled in relief and continued to cry.

Cal kissed her cheek as they held each other at arm's length. He wiped her tears away and frowned at her. He hated it when she cried. "Let's go get the girls. I'll drive."

Emily sat at the table in Torres's kitchen as Lucy sat on the floor with plain white paper and half a box of broken crowns Torres had dug up somewhere. Emily kept glancing over at Lucy every so often, taking a break from her phone to just see how she was doing.

"You act like her sister," Torres commented as Lucy continued her peaceful drawing and she took a seat at the table with a mug of cocoa in hand.

Emily smiled a little to herself, not thinking about Torres reading her face. The idea brightened Emily. Unlike most children, Emily never wanted a little sibling. She could see the flaws and hardships her parents had and she often thought that it wouldn't be fair to drag another child into the middle of a war zone. She would never say that to her parents of course, they always thought Emily couldn't see it. But Lucy was different.

She was this little ray of sunshine and a goofy grin. Somehow she just fit into their lives like a puzzle piece they didn't know what missing. She sealed them together in a way that so unbelievably perfect.

"She needs a sister," Emily replied with a nonchalant shrug.

Torres looked at Lucy. She held a stuff kitty close to her side the entire time she was drawing.

"Ria?" Lucy said suddenly, a small frown tugging at her lips as she put down the colors. "When's Mommy coming to get me?"

Torres checked the time on her phone. "Any time now."

Lucy seemed to accept this and continue coloring while Torres turned to Emily. "So, what? Your dad and Foster finally dating?"

Emily rolled her eyes. "They don't like labels, but pretty much."

Torres glanced over at Lucy again. "So, anyone afraid of the collateral damage if this doesn't work? I mean, the kids just…" Is there a polite way of say damaged?

The idea had never really crossed Emily's mind. "It's going to work," Emily said with certainty.

"You dad has a way of pissing people off and someone eventually leaves," Torres reminded her.

"Gillian hasn't left, and Dad's not stupid. He wouldn't let her get away."

The fact Emily sounded like this was a fact set in stone that would never change made Torres have a little more hope in the man. He raised a pretty good kid and Lucy was blossoming with the help of the loving parents she had gained.

As if on cue, there was a knock on the apartment door and Emily rushed to open it.

"Ready to go home?" Cal asked as Lucy sprinted toward them.

Lucy hugged his neck and nodded. "You coming home with us?"

Cal squeezed the little girl and she giggled happily. "I'm taking you and your mummy home so I can tuck you into bed!"

Emily was already hugging Gillian who looked extremely relieved that their hard day was over. Torres pretended not to notice the bit of smeared eye makeup Gillian missed when trying to conceal her earlier tears.

"Thank you," Gillian told Torres, true gratefulness showing in her features as she gave her arm a slight squeeze.

"It was nothing," Torres replied awkwardly, watching as Cal carried Lucy back toward the elevator followed by Emily and finally Gillian.

It was oddly beautiful. Somehow every piece of the odd family fit.

_**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I can't decide if next chapter should be the one where the corrupt police arrest Emily or we meet Ria's sister… what do you think?**_


	14. Sisters

Lucy came skipping into the house with Cal and Emily close behind. Emily looked a mixture of pissed off and humiliated and Cal looked… well, he seemed to be trying to hide a smirk. Gillian gave them a questioning look as she put down the book she was reading and let Lucy crawl in beside her.

"How'd it go?" she asked hesitantly, looking between Cal and Emily.

Emily just muttered something incoherent and Cal struggled to keep his face neutral. Lucy on the other hand was very willing to tell the story at Emily's expense. "She hit a fire thingy and water went _everywhere_!"

Gillian gave Cal a concerned look. "Fire thingy?"

"Hydrant. Or should I say puppy?" Cal tossed a look Emily's direction. The look she gave back was nothing short of hellish.

Gillian cleared her throat. "I think tonight is an icecream night." Without another word, she stood up and headed to the kitchen before she had a war or a meltdown on her hands. The feelings toward whatever had happened were a little too fresh and poor Emily needed time. Whatever it was, her ego was definitely damaged.

Emily didn't even wait for the bowl, as soon as Gillian laid the carton on the table, the lid was off and Emily was digging in it with a large spoon. With a careful edge, Gillian sat down beside Emily and gave her a cautious look.

"What happened?" she tried again, this time more prepared.

"Dad yelled puppy…" Emily muttered. "While I was parallel parking."

Cal's laugh was heard even with his back turned, earning an efficient glare from both girls at the table. "What?" he said as though he was completely innocent. "It's not like I enjoyed it. I'm paying for the damages aren't I?"

Lucy grabbed flowers and jumped into Gillian's lap ready to join the ice cream party. As Cal reached for a bite off Gillian's spoon she slapped his hand away. She had chosen her side. He pouted slightly, but was interrupted with a knock on the door before he could say anything else.

He gave Emily a look. "Don't hold a grudge. If you hold a grudge your face gets all pinched… Look at your mum."

Then he looked at Gillian. "I'm above comparing you to my ex-wife, but I could compare you to your mother," he warned, a smile tugging at his lips.

She shook her head and failed at keeping her smile away. "I thought you'd be trying to get off my bad list."

He got to the door way and turned around. "Maybe I like it there," he countered, waggling his eyebrows enough to make Gillian laugh and Emily roll her eyes.

"You guys are gross," she muttered, but there was a smile tugging on her lips too.

Before Gillian could say anything else, Torres was moving into Cal's kitchen and commanding Cal and her to listen. Gillian studied Torres's face first, her features tight and her eyebrows oblique. She was scared and conflicted. The voice on the recording sounded terrified and teary, but there may have bit of something lying underneath that… Whoever was asking Ria Torres for help, knew her very well and knew what buttons to push.

The recording ended and Lucy looked at the phone on the table, almost seeming like she was trying to analyze what she heard as well. Torres looked between Cal and Gillian for help, but Emily was the first to speak.

"She sounds pretty desperate."

"And really scared," Lucy added, nodding. For being five she was a very good listener.

"Yeah, well, she's a liar, and a delinquent," Torres countered, but still seemed torn. "Which is why she's been locked up for the past seven months."

Cal finally stole Gillian's spoon and ice cream and took a big bite. "What, you feel that message is a lie?" It was a test, Gillian could see that, but she was still interested in Torres's answer.

"I don't know- I don't know. I _never _know with her!" Torres exclaimed motioning toward the phone as if it was a dangerous animal.

Gillian tilted her head. "Who is this?"

Torres looked at her with a bit of guilt and shame. "She's my sister."

Gillian was very ill tempered when it came to the way people treated children at times. Yes, Eva may have been a teenager, but she was the same age as Emily and her maternal instincts kicked in and she could easily tear this blond warden's head off.

Cal was just annoyed with Torres and her sudden lack of brains. It was like when her sister was involved she lost all cognitive process and it simply infuriated him. In his mind, someone messed with his girls he would personally screw with their minds until they didn't trust their own beliefs. Granted, Torres little waterworks display did its job. Maybe the girl did have some hope.

Gillian watched from behind the glass as Torres and Cal met with Eva. She was already prepared for Cal to push everyone's buttons, but she was curious to see what buttons he would be forced to push when Eva's personality began to show. Doctor Burns, the correctional facility's psychologist, also seemed greatly interested.

Eva had her hands tucked into her pockets as she stared at Cal with boredom. "What's with the old white guy?"

Cal was slumped in a chair and didn't make any effort to move as he introduced himself. "I'm your sister's boss."

"The lie guy?" She tried to sound bored, but Gillian and Cal could both hear the interest in her voice.

"Yup."

Eva rolled her head toward Torres and glared at her. "You brought the lie guy." There was absolutely no fight or question in her voice, she just sounded like she should have expected it.

Ria ignored her sister. "What the hell happened last night?"

"Like you care." Eva didn't look at her. Gillian immediately noted that Eva was quite the manipulator. She was already playing on her sister's emotions and was doing it quite well. The question was if Ria was the only one she could manipulate like that.

"Hey," Torres snapped. "I'm here. I care."

Eva walked away from her, focusing on Cal with sultry eyes. Manipulation was just one of Eva's games, Gillian decided, but it was a game she'd lose with Cal.

Cal smirked, already knowing the angle the girl was preparing to play. Of course he'd win the game of mind tricks quite easily, but the fact was he was going to let Eva try and play it.

"You're super sexy, you wanna make out?" Eva offered, leaning against the table and giving a smile that probably meant this direction had worked before on older men. Gillian cringed and if Torres would have seen it she would have down the same.

Cal didn't hesitate. "Absolutely. Climb on board, darling."

The only one that was expecting that answer was Gillian, but that wasn't to say she approved of it. Eva seemed taken back and Torres looked disgusted and shocked. "She's testing him," Gillian offered to the man to her left.

He glanced at her with half a smile. "You think?"

Suddenly she remembered that the man standing next to her was also psychologist. Her cheeks burned red and she smiled. "Sorry, I'll hold the condescension."

Doctor Burns smiled at her again, mentally taking note that she was very, extremely, beautiful also that she didn't have a ring on her left hand. Still, he turned his attention back to Eva.

"They share a dad," Gillian mused aloud. "I gather he was pretty useless."

Burns nodded. "Stage four alcoholic. Eva grew up being beaten during his blackouts. Mother O.D.'d when she was ten. Eva was in the next room."

Gillian shook her head. Alcoholism was something she knew a little too much about, Cal too, not that he'd admit it. Violent, useless alcoholics. Quite something to have in common.

"Then she went into the system when what she needed was intensive therapy."

Where would Lucy be in ten years if Carrie didn't make that call to Gillian. Of course it was impossible to know, but the fact that Lucy would have gotten tossed into the system and forgotten like so many others killed her.

Eva was very much an independent mind, but she was also just a scared little girl.

She had barely told them that she had seen Marly, her friend, sneak out last night when the alarms started to blare. Lock down.

Marly was dead. Someone had killed her and now Eva felt even more alone in the world than before. Torres sucked at consoling her sister and Cal was sick of both of the girls by now, trying to play with each other's head. He was tired of playing with them so he offered Eva a deal. She open up and tell him what the hell was going on or he leaves.

Now, Cal saw it best to break all rules, and laws, and break her out of the facility, without telling Gillian. Imagine her surprise when he walked into the office with Eva close behind him.

Loker, who had be interested to know that Ria had a sister seemed even more curious when Cal burst into the room. "Oh, look, is this little Torres?" he asked excitedly, halfway reminding Gillian of Lucy.

Reynolds looked between Eva and Cal. It must really suck being the FBI guy involved with the Lightman Group. "You kno, I just remembered, I got some work to do downtown. And I'm gunna pretend like I never even saw her. You call me if you need me."

Gillian on the other hand was glaring at Cal. "You could be charged with aiding and abetting," she reminded him, the venom in her voice only being heard by her ears. "Or kidnapping."

He didn't understand why she was angry really. "Yeah. Well, I've been charged with worse."

Eva narrowed her eyes at Ria. "Sorry. If I did get killed like Marly, your life would get easier."

"You're embarrassing me in front of my bosses, okay?" Ria snapped back.

Cal waved them off. "I don't think she cares."

"F.Y.I., I'm not saying with you," Eva snapped, glaring at Ria and getting to her feet.

"Oh yeah, then where you going to go? Some low life boyfriend's?" Ria snapped back also on her feet now.

Eva gave her sister a go-to-hell smirk. "I'm staying with Cal."

Everyone looked at Cal and he raised his eyebrows. "Now, don't go thinking that this is a "get out of jail free" pass, 'cause it's not," he clarified giving Eva a stern look. "As soon as this is solved you're going right back. In the meantime, you're staying with Foster."

Her head snapped to look at Cal and he was surprised to see the anger in her eyes as a long awkward silence fell over them. Normally she'd glare at him then accept the position she was being put in, this time she looked murderous.

Then she finally back down a little, her eyes still narrow. "Okay, well, would you like to take Lucy tonight then?"

Cal seemed confused. "Why? Eva would love to color with a five year old, wouldn't ya?" He glanced at Eva and she just looked confused.

"Foster doesn't need a delinquent around her kid," Ria agreed, but just about started a whole new fight with her sister. But before it could get to far, Gillian jumped in again.

"It'll be fine, but you and I-" she gave Cal a hard look, "-we need to talk later."

That sure didn't sound good to any of them as Gillian took Eva under her arm. "I'm sure you're hungry. Lucy will probably be betting for macaroni and cheese, is that good for you?"

Eva nodded as they headed toward the door, still trying to process the disagreement between Cal and Gillian.

"Oi, and Foster, why don't you get Doctor Burns on the phone and have him come in here." Cal flashed a grin. "I believe you have his number." The last bit held a bit of distaste, but Gillian seemed to take a bit of pride in the fact he was jealous. She actually didn't have his number, but she knew how to get a hold of him through the correctional facility.

Gillian stopped by her office to see Anna playing with Lucy. She may have missed Heidi, who was now going on to better things, but Anna was staring to win her over, especially with Lucy. Lucy looked up and waved at Gillian through the glass before thanking Anna for coloring with her, collecting Flowers, and running toward her.

She struggled to push the heavy glass door open and hugged Gillian tight. She was still in her school uniform with her red bow still holding back most of her curls from her face. "Time to go home?" she asked knowingly before looking over at Eva. Suddenly she got quiet and buried her face in Gillian's stomach.

"Lucy," Gillian said gently turning her around to look at their house guest for the night. "This is Eva."

Eva smiled at the little girl who looked nervous. "Hi."

Lucy remained silent as she wiggled her fingers in a sort of wave, staying very close to Gill. "Eva's going to stay with us tonight, so the sooner you quit being shy the more fun we can have," she tried walking with the little girl toward the elevator.

Lucy seemed to think about this, looking between her mother and the house guest. As the elevator closed she looked up at Eva. "You like macaroni and cheese?"

When they got home, Lucy ran upstairs to change into her after school clothes and Gillian went to her own room to change as well and offered the guest room to Eva. Lucy came running down the steps in a pair of jeans and a dark purple plaid shirt. Eva had already changed into more comfortable clothing, and couldn't help but find it funny that the girl loved sliding across the floor in just her socks.

Gillian came down the steps next and just in time to see Lucy slide a little too far and lose her balance. She landed hard on her butt on the tile floor but burst into a fit of giggles. "Ow," she giggled as she stood up and ran to Gillian.

Evan studied them. Really, Lucy didn't look much like Gillian at all. She had olive skin, compared to Gillian's fair complexion, and her beautiful burnet curls were nothing like Gillian's dirty blond or light brown hair. Their eyes were different shades of blue and Lucy had dimples on both cheeks.

Yet Gillian scooped her into her arms and held her close, both laughing as Lucy tried to make a funny face.

Eva's mom never treated her like that, at least not as far as she could remember. Eva always came second, she was second to everyone in her life. Actually, most of the time she wasn't even second. But just looking at Gillian and Lucy, she knew Lucy did not come second to anything in her mother's life.

About an hour and a half later, Gillian was putting away the dishes and Eva helped clear the table. Lucy had already helped with putting away the clean silverware and sat next to Eva at the table. Her kitty cat, Flowers, sat on the table as Gillian and Eva took over the conversation.

Gillian studied her expression as she helped Lucy color. "So, tell me about you and your sister."

Eva scoffed. "What's to tell?" she asked, her usual attitude present but not as harsh. In truth, Eva really liked Gillian. She felt like she was one of the few people in the world that actually wanted to listen and not just toss her to the curb like it felt like so many others did. "Ria always thinks everything is my fault."

"I'm sure that's not true," Gillian tried leaning against her kitchen counter. Lucy slowly snuck a peak at Eva and Gillian almost wondered if Lucy was trying to read her expression like Cal and she do.

"We never lived together 'cause we didn't have the same mom but when I was little, she would come over and help me with my homework." Eva tried to pretend she was indifferent but she still sounded sad.

Lucy looked up at Gillian. "Like Emily? Cause she's my sister and she helps me with my homework but she lives with Cal."

Gillian tried to think of a way of explaining it to her, as Eva just looked confused. "Not exactly, sweetie. Emily is _like _your sister but she's not. Eva and Ria share the same dad."

Lucy seemed to ponder this. "So like David? But he's my brother…"

This little piece of information was filed away as Gillian turned back to Eva. "She does love you, you know," she told her, meaning Ria.

The teenager shrugged and fiddled with the child's coloring book. "Yeah, yeah, I guess."

Realizing that this topic was just going to get more upsetting, Gillian went for her favorite thing. "So, what do you want for dessert?" she offered with a big smile on her face.

Lucy jumped up as Eva smiled. "What do you got?"

Gillian opened the freezer door and looked inside. "Well, I have some ice cream, of course," her favorite thing, "but I also-"

The door slammed into her face and sent her stumbling into the counter as four people dressed in black came charging into her kitchen. Lucy was roughly thrown into the wall as another person shoved past her and grabbed Gillian. The other three were pulling at Eva who was trying to break free.

"Put her down!" Gillian demanded when another person grabbed her and threw her into the counter again. Panic pulsed through her as she grabbed anything she could and hit her attacker with it.

Lucy was on her feet, trying to help Eva. "Let her go!" the little girl demanded. Someone's hand made contact with the little girl's face, knocking her into the wall again. This time she didn't get back up, just cried as she watched Eva and her mother fight.

They had Eva on the table, searching her for something as Gillian grabbed the frying pan she had made sandwiches on earlier and slammed into someone's face.

Her attacker fell to the ground, but before she could get to Lucy or help Eva he grabbed her feet and pulled her down too.

"The egg- where is it?" a young female voice demanded as they threw Eva against the table again.

A knee was pressing into Gillian's back as she struggled against her attackers. "Tie her up!" a male voice demanded from above her.

"I'm trying- she's strong!" another voice replied.

"I'll get the kid, I'll throw her in the pantry."

Gillian kept fighting, so did Eva. "Tell me where it is!" the girl yelled as she hit Eva again.

Gillian called to her but there was no reply from her. She could hear the pantry door slam and a chair slide in front of it.

Eva kicked and swung, but came up with nothing as the egg was pulled from her pocket. "I got it!" the girl cheered. "Let's go, I got it!"

Eva sat up, reaching for the egg as the people began to disappear from the room. A hand slammed into her face and she fell onto the table again.

Gillian called to her. The room was eerily silent. Eva must have been knocked out by the hit she heard and there was absolutely no sound coming from Lucy. "Lucy? Eva?" Gillian called to the girls, her entire body aching.

There was a slight whimper that she recognized as Lucy. "It's okay, sweetheart," Gillian tried as she tried to get a view toward the pantry. "Everything's going to be fine."

There was a loud groan from the table as Eva started to come to. "Eva, Eva are you okay?" Gillian called to her.

She thought about them taking the egg. No she was not alright. She was screwed. She lost the egg. That was all she had and now it was gone.

"Shit…" she muttered as her headache truly began to register.

"Can you help me with-" Gillian twisted her wrists against the bonds and Eva immediately got to her feet, a bit unsteady. Her body hurt but she couldn't just leave Gillian on the floor tied up.

When Gillian was free, she studied Eva's tear stained face, noticing a bruise that was already forming. Then without a word, Gillian pulled the girl into a protective embrace. It was probably the most motherly gesture that had ever been made to Eva, but she fell into it easily and returned the tight hug.

There was another whimper from the pantry and Gillian slowly released Eva to remove the chair that was keeping the little girl captured.

The pantry was decently large, it was about the side of a small closet. Lucy was huddled on the ground with a bloody nose and a knot on her forehead already forming. Her face was wet with tears and she whimpered as she reached out to her mother.

Gillian picked her up and held her tight. Barely made a sound as she cried, her arms wrapped tightly around her mother's neck. Eva wanted to help her, but she didn't know what the right thing to do would be.

Gillian pulled her phone out of her pocket and handed it to Eva. "Call Cal, he's speed dial two."

Eva nodded and held down the button. Of course he'd be on speed dial. Also of course he'd be there in under five minutes, barging into the house like he owned it with Ria and some girl Eva didn't recognize. She looked the most like Lucy that she had seen, but just her curly hair.

"Gillian!" Cal called for her, immediately going to her and hugging her tight. Her cheek was already purple and he didn't want to let go of her. Lucy was between them, still silent. She hadn't said a word since Gillian pulled her out of the pantry.

"What the bloody hell happened here? Are you alright, love?" he asked her as her eyes got teary again. She nodded then looked to Lucy again. Cal touched the little girl's back as she continued her soft crying. "How about you, huh? You okay?"

Lucy didn't reply, just held tighter to Gillian's neck.

Emily slowly went closer to Gillian and looked at her and Lucy. She wanted to hug them, but was leery to. They both looked like they were in pain. Cal carefully pried Lucy off of Gillian and the girl clung to him in much the same way.

"I sorry," the girl whispered softly. Cal tried to tell her that she had nothing to be sorry about, that he was sorry that he wasn't there, but Lucy kept shaking her head and crying. She was completely distraught and it made Gillian feel like the worst mother in the world.

Emily hugged Gillian and clung to her, their small dysfunctional family having a moment while Ria and Eva just exchanged looks.

"You all right?" Ria asked finally, gaining the attention of the others.

Gillian pulled out a seat as Cal stood beside her. His protectiveness obvious as he held Lucy and Emily stood close by.

"You should be proud," Gillian told Ria, giving Eva's hand a reassuring squeeze. "She got me out of my ropes. She untied me."

Eva looked down. She was still ashamed it happened. She knew it was her fault. So did Ria. "Yeah," Torres added sarcastically. "Good thing she was here."

That hurt Eva more than she would have wanted anyone to see. Did wouldn't want other people to get hurt, she didn't hurt people… "I had nothing to do with this!" she assured her.

"Oh, no?" Ria snapped back. "'Cause I, I find it very strange that the one night you come and you stay with Foster, her house gets broken into. What the hell is wrong with you? Lucy's gone through enough and now she's-"

"-Ria!" Gillian snapped, ready to defend Eva.

But she didn't listen, Ria just kept going, now yelling. "It was Tyrel, wasn't it? You called him."

"I had nothing to do with this!" Eva shouted back, tears in her eyes. Now the two girls were having a shouting match in each other's faces.

Gillian got to her feet. "Stop it!" she demanded.

Ria turn around and snapped in Gillian's face. "Don't defend her!"

Now, Cal was pissed. "Hey!" he shouted louder than all of them. He handed Lucy to Emily. "Take her upstairs. Gill and I will be up in a minute."

Emily nodded and headed for the steps. He glared at both the Torres's. "You knock it off," he told Ria with so much bite in his voice it scared her.

Eva didn't wait for anything else to be said, she just pushed past her sister and left the room.

"Eva was just as terrified as I was," Gillian snapped at Torres in a way that she had never seen before. Torres had also never seen Gillian cry like she was. "She had no idea this was going to happen or who they were. No idea!"

Ria shook her head and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean…" Taking another breath she went after her sister.

Tears ran down Gillian's face as she started to clean up the mess in the kitchen. Cal went to her, guiding her up by her arm. "Come here, darling." She continued to sob as he ran his hand over her sounders. "It's all good, darling. It's all good."

It may have been the sweetest Cal had ever been as he hugged her tight. He kissed the side of her head then let her pull away to wipe her cheeks. He gave her half a smile as he cupped her face. "I had no idea you were such a crybaby."

Finally a laugh came from Gillian as she went back to him and let him hold her again. "I couldn't protect Lucy," she told him as he held her tight. "They were just kids. I could tell by their voices. There were three boys and a girl… And… Lucy was just caught in the middle."

"From Covington Correctional Facility you think?"

She nodded as she continued to cry. "Cal… Lucy. She's…"

Cal understood exactly what Gillian was trying to say. In fact he felt guilty. Eva should have just stayed with him. He should have had Emily stay with Gillian or Zoe and had Eva stay with him. Logically he knew that would have been a worse idea because who knew what Eva would try to pull when she was alone with him, but his girls were hurt. Gillian had a bruise on her face and Lucy was silent, again.

Torres then came back into the room. "She's gone. She left."

Eva. Eva had run out when Ria attacked her.

Cal looked at Gillian. There was a silent debate that Ria knew what they were thinking immediately. "Go. Lucy needs you right now and Eva always disappears. Will find her in the morning."

Gillian didn't have to be told twice. Cal guided her up the steps to the widows walk of her house. The door to Lucy's room was open and she was sitting on her bed with her head down toward her lap. Emily was kneeling on the floor, her hands on Lucy's legs trying to talk to her, but Luc wouldn't respond.

As a mother, Gillian wanted to go to Lucy and pull her into her arms, but as a psychologist, she knew better. Placing a hand on Emily's shoulder, she quietly dismissed her and sat next to Lucy on the bed.

Lucy didn't move. Her sobs were soft and Gillian was well aware that her little girl was going through something deeper than any of the rest of them were. She had to make the first move.

A little hand wiped harshly at her tears. "I'm sorry," she cried, her shoulders shaking with sobs.

Gillian already expected that, but she also expected the little girl not to know why she was sorry, just to think she should be. "There's nothing to be sorry about," Gillian replied, resisting once again to reach out and touch Lucy.

The curls bounced as Lucy nodded. "But there is. If I'm not good bad things happen to me and you got hurt too, Mommy. You and Eva. It's my fault."

"Sweetie, it's not-"

Lucy stared up at her mother. "But it is! Daddy says when I do something bad, I get hurt. I try to be good, Mommy. I try to be good. I don't wanna get hurt."

Emily looked at Cal as if to ask if he was hearing this too. She wanted to help, but she knew this was something for the adults to deal with. This wasn't a moment where Emily could offer her own wise advice but Lucy needed her father and mother to help because that is what they do. Lucy needed them.

Cal took a step toward the little girl. "No one's going to hurt you, love. What happened was not your fault. You did nothing wrong."

Lucy looked up at him, then slowly looked at her mother. "Daddy didn't hurt you? It wasn't me?"

A very illogical part of Cal wanted to tell Lucy that if her daddy ever tried to hurt her again he would kill him. It was not an empty threat either. The man would be dead if he dared lay a hand on Lucy again, he may be dead if Cal ever saw the man.

"Lucy, what happened was not you at all," Gillian assured her daughter as Cal placed both his hand on Gillian's thighs. It was like they had a pact to keep this little girl safe.

Lucy then snuck in under Gillian's shoulder and laid her head on her chest. "Daddy's not coming back right? Cal's my daddy now, right?"

Gillian pulled Lucy close and kissed her hair while she met her eyes with Cal over her head, but neither of them said anything. They hadn't talked about that. It was a step that both of them were very hesitant in discussing. Their relationship already seemed to be on the fast track, them staying the night together almost every night, driving to work together, letting people find out about their relationship, but were they ready to let Cal really be Lucy's father?

"Yep," Emily said from the door, her big brown eyes certain as Lucy looked up at her. "I told you that we could share him."

Lucy looked up at her. "So we're like sisters?"

Emily smiled and went to the edge of the bed again, kneeling down next to her father and resting her head against her father's shoulder. "We are sisters."

_**So this totally ended up being a lot longer than I meant it to be. Now, I can finish the episode or move on. What do you think?**_


	15. Protection

Gillian was pissed. She was so beyond angry as she threw glared at the girl that sat in the cube in front of her. Cal was looking for Eva but Gill was glad she was doing this by herself. He would have felt inclined to protect her, this was her fight.

Still, she tried to remain calm, talking to the girl like she wasn't in trouble, but the denial just kept making her more and more angry. Very rarely did Gillian lose her temper, but it felt like venom was on the tip of her tongue.

"I know you were in my house, Amber," Gillian hissed through gritted teeth. "You and three boys from Covington."

Amber kept her arms protectively in front of her. "You don't know nothing." The grabbed for a chair and pulled it up to sit in.

Gillian watched the entire time, taking mental notes of every action the girl made. "You know what I know? I know the turn of your arm when you pull that chair. It's pretty distinctive." Gillian moved closer and stared down at the girl. "I saw it just now and I saw it _at my house_."

The girl didn't say anything and it just made Gillian more furious. It would be easier for both of them if she just said she did it, it was the denial that was sending Gillian to the edge. She hated being lied to. "You broke into my house and terrorized my daughter. My five year old was afraid to go down the step of her own home this morning because of you!"

Amber glanced up at her and Gillian felt her anger radiating off of her, but remained silent. Gillian huffed. "Tell me about the egg."

She shrugged, and looked away. "I can see that you want to tell me." Amber kept her eyes down, trying to pretend they weren't having this conversation. "Look at me," Gillian told the girl. Amber still ignored her. "Look at me!" This time is a forceful demand that earned her attention. Amber's eyes dart to Gillian's cheek and there was the smallest flash of guilt. "I think you owe me."

"The crew, okay? The crew made us do it." For a girl who tried to portray a certain amount of strength she looked vulnerable as her voice shook and tears welled in her eyes. "One night, every few weeks, we break into houses, take stuff rich folks spend millions on."

"Who runs this crew?" Gillian asked her. "Somebody's got to get you out of there."

Amber scoffed at her. "I don't know. I ain't upper management."

Gillian inhaled and rolled her eyes. "What do you get in return for your participation?"

"Early release… You can get, like, months off your time."

The deputy warden. She's the only one with that kind of power. No wonder these kids were scared. "I need to know who runs the crew," Gillian told her, kneeling down and finally playing her usual role as friend. Amber turned her back to her, silently telling her there was no possible way she would tell that bit. "I know you're scared, but I can protect you."

Amber turned back to Gillian with disgust. "Look at your face, bitch. You can't even protect yourself."

Those words stuck with her for the rest of the day. Even after the deputy warden was arrested, the words haunted her. She was a psychologist, she knew that she shouldn't be stuck on that stupid comment like she was, but it got to her. She failed couldn't protect herself last night and she definitely couldn't protect Lucy. She fought and she failed. What kind of mother was she?

Cal watched as Gillian worked at her desk as though she was just fine. As though she didn't have a bruise on her face or was glancing at the clock, waiting for five o'clock. She had already done so much for Eva, getting her into a boarding school that would help her turn around her life and listening to her when she wasn't feeling heard. But he could see her distress. Just because Gillian was harder for him to read, didn't mean she was impossible. Plus, Gill usually wore her emotions on her sleeve, even when she didn't want to.

After a few extra moments of watching her, he knocked on her door frame. "I'm fixing to take Emily for her driving test. Care to join us for a 'congratulations/better luck next time' dinner tonight?"

Gillian laughed as she glanced at her clock. "Emily has Lucy, are you going to take her along for the driver's test?"

Cal shrugged. "She can come. Normally she's better behaved than Em." Then he really looked at her. "You can come."

She gave him a thankful smile and stood up. She crossed her desk and ran her hands over his chest. "You know I love you, right?"

His eyes narrowed. "That sounds like a dangerous question." She smirked at him and ran her hands over his shoulders and crossed them behind his neck. She kissed his lips, teasing them as she held her body against his. When she pulled away Cal seemed to think for a bit. "Okay, I suppose I know." Her lips hit his again and he smiled as he felt her tongue flick against his lips and take a bit more control. They broke apart again. "And I suppose I could say I love you too."

"Am I twisting your arm that much?" she teased as his hands held her waist.

"Can't say I don't like it." Then he touched the bruise on her face with a gentle hand and looked into her sad eyes. "Gillian, of course I love you. What's the matter?"

She pulled away a little and rested her head on his shoulder. "Can we, um, stay at your place tonight?" Her words were careful and soft, as though she was waiting on a rejection.

His heart fell. There was definitely fear in her voice and even a bit of shame. He pulled her back and looked at her. The bruise on her cheek killed him. "You can stay at my place however long you'd like, love. You and Lucy. You don't have to butter me up to ask that."

Gillian gave him a guilty smile that said more than he could read on her. "That's one of the reasons I love you."

"You mean there's more?" Cal kissed her one last time and released her so she could grab her coat and purse, but she held his arm. "I'll finish up here then go by the house to get some clothes for Lucy and myself before heading home. To your place I mean."

She blushed at her slip up. Since when was his place her home, but Cal gave her the graces not to say if he noticed. Cal was her best friend and though he loved to tease her, he knew that sometimes she wasn't ready to say what she felt.

"I'll let you know how Emily does. Hopefully no one yells puppy," Cal teased.

Gillian laughed. "You won't be in the car, will you?"

He gave her a smirk and another peck on the lips. "See you tonight, love."

Gillian sat back down at her desk and started to type. She _could_ protect herself and Lucy. She could protect her family with Cal. Gillian was a strong woman, but it wasn't wrong to feel safer with someone sleeping in bed next to her. That's what Cal gave her.

For the rest of her life she would never forget what happened that night. Never, but she knew that it wouldn't always haunt her. It wasn't going to be easy, but she'd manage. She had Cal, Emily, and Lucy. She had a family and she wasn't alone in protecting them.

A knock on the frame of the door pulled her out of her thoughts. She looked up, surprised to see Doctor Burns standing there with a bouquet of flowers and a nervous smile on his face. Immediately a flattered smile appeared on her lips, but so did an apologetic look in her eye. She had enjoyed the man's company, but it a purely innocent way. Apparently he didn't see things the same way.

Gillian stood and welcomed him into her office. Dave could sense the let down before she even uttered a word.

"I thought I'd be chivalrous and bring your flowers and ask you to dinner, but I think you have other plans," Doctor Burns said taking his defeat honorably. Still, he offered her the flowers and she kindly accepted, knowing it would be worse to send him on his way with flowers to remind him.

"I'm sorry, Dave," she said honestly. "I didn't mean to give you the impression-"

He shrugged. "I got the taken vibe from you, but tried to ignore it. Who's the lucky guy?"

Gillian smiled and reached for a picture on her desk. She held the picture out for him and he smirked. Of course. Cal Lightman would hold such a gentle woman's heart. There was a little girl with bright blue eyes and long dark curls between them in the picture.

"That's my daughter, well, foster daughter," Gillian told him, knowing he was trying to place her. "I'm in the process of legally adopting her. She's really come a long way."

Dave Burns handed her the photo back and gave her a smile. "Tell Doctor Lightman he's a lucky man, but he seems like a pretty smart guy so he should know."

Gillian smiled. To be honest, she honestly believed Cal did know. He treated her like she was a queen and he loved her like… like Alec never did. "Thank you, Dave."

The conversation ended with a nod and politely left, leaving Gillian with a beautiful bouquet of flowers and feeling extremely flattered. Cal wouldn't be happy that someone came onto her, but he would quickly forget when she reminded him how happy she was right beside him.

As she gathered her purse and grabbed her car keys, she was happy to finally head home. To Cal's home. For the first time in her life, she understood what it meant when people say "home is where the heart is".

As she unlocked Cal's door, she laid the bags at the door. There were fits of giggles and laughter from the kitchen in which Gillian gladly followed as she kicked off her heels and left them in a path from the door. She dropped her coat on the floor and sighed with content exhaustion as she leaned against the frame of the kitchen door looking at all three of them.

Lucy was happily holding Flowers under her chin, and smiled though her bruises looked tender. She was the first to notice her mother's presence and ran to her. Gillian picked up her daughter and held her close. Cal smiled at her and pecked her lips and put an arm around her waist.

Emily watched and loved the way Gillian smiled at looked at her dad. It was like something in a movie. It was like neither of them could quit looking at each other. Her dad had finally got it right and one day Emily hoped that she would know what that felt like.

"Mommy, Cal said you and me are staying here tonight. Is that true?" Lucy asked as she absently played with the pendant on Gillian's necklace.

"Tonight it is. Maybe tomorrow Cal and Emily will come over and help us clean up after last night," Gillian replied, casting a look at the others. "But right now I'm hungry."

Cal smiled and motioned to the stove. "Already working on it."

"And it's not just beans on toast either, Gill. You should be proud of him," Emily added with a nod of her head.

"Oh, I am, very," Gillian teased back letting Cal lace his fingers through hers. "How did the driver's test go?"

As if waiting for the question to come, Emily pulled a small plastic card out of her back pocket and held it proudly for Gillian to see. "I'm legal! Now I just need wheels." There was a very pointed look at Cal but he pretended not to notice.

Gillian offered to do the dishes since Cal cooked and she sent him into the living room with a kiss. Emily and Lucy stayed behind to help Gillian. Gillian could see there was something Emily wanted to talk about as she stacked the dishes in the dishwasher.

"You're quiet," Gillian mused to Emily as she handed her another plate to stack.

A deep sigh escaped Emily's lips and she looked up at Gillian. "You and Dad are happy right?"

That was quite the question, Gillian thought as she looked back at the disgruntled teenager. "I'd say we are. I sure have a lot to be happy about," she replied thoughtfully. To be honest, she'd never been happier than when she was now.

Emily sighed again kept putting away the dishes. "Can I tell you something? And we keep it a secret like before? Like before you and Dad?"

Gill stopped what she was doing and looked over to Lucy at the table. "Why don't you go in the other room with Cal, sweetie?"

Lucy nodded and carried Flowers into the other room by her paw. Gillian then turned around and sat up on the island in the middle of the kitchen while Emily took a seat on the counter opposite from her.

"Same rules apply as always, Em. That doesn't change," Gillian promised her.

Emily looked almost teary as she looked back at Gillian. "Please don't think I'm a little kid for saying this, but I'm worried."

Gillian felt her heart wrench as she looked back at those big brown eyes. "What about?"

"You and Dad," the teenager replied shyly.

Gillian nodded. "Ah. I thought it might have something to do with that."

Emily rubbed her hands up and down her thighs and kept her eyes down. "It's just, well, I don't want anything to happen. You guys are happy, Dad's happy and he's not, well, whoring around."

Gillian laughed a bit at her choice of words, but she couldn't exactly say it wasn't true.

"And you've been in my life for, like, forever and I don't know what would happen if you guys broke up. I mean… would you leave? Would you? And take Lucy?" Emily sounded hurt by just the idea. Gillian watched her fidget with her confession and she decided it was time to quit the psychologist act and be the friend or whatever Gillian was to her.

Hopping off the island, Gillian pulled Emily off the counter and onto her feet. Gillian hugged her tight and kissed her forehead. "Emily, you are too important to me for me to just leave you or take Lucy away from Cal. I can't promise everything will be perfect, but your dad and I are trying."

Emily held onto her tight. "You've always been like a mom to me, Gill. Lucy's really lucky."

Tears sprung to Gillian's eyes. "Oh, honey, I would definitely say I'm the lucky one."

That night, Gillian kissed Emily goodnight when she headed up to bed and let Cal tuck in Lucy into the guest bedroom. She sipped her wine and let her mind wonder about the future. Their future, the one she wanted to truly to share with Cal.

She refused to let herself dream too deeply, thinking like a foolish teenager would was not her intention, but the ideas kept popping into her mind.

Cal stopped on the steps and watched Gillian smile into her glass of wine. He loved watching her think. Her smile was blissful and wondering. Without even hesitating, he moved toward her, took the wine from her hand and placed a kiss on her lips.

She was surprised at first, as his lips captured her and he pinned her body to the couch. Her lips quickly caught up with her brain. Her hands went into his hair as she deepened the kiss, immediately wanting more than.

Cal pulled away from her, kneeling above her on all fours he gave her a wolfish grin. "Tell me what that smile was about and I may continue."

She grinned and groaned playfully, tightening her fingers in his hair and pulling him down close enough to nibble at his lower lip. "Cal," she hummed teasingly.

But he didn't budge, instead he just kept up his grin, giving her very little in reply. "Tell me what you were thinking about, love." His hands danced just under her shirt on her stomach, blazing a fire in their trail.

Two could play at that game.

Her hands ran down his chest as she smiled. "I was thinking about you, of course," she told him with a purr.

He smiled. "Well, that's half true."

"And the kids and…"

She sat up, her mind suddenly deciding to trail back to where it was minutes before. Cal could see the pleasantry as well as the hint of sadness in her eyes as she thought.

"I don't want to lose you, Cal. I don't was Lucy to lose you and I don't want to lose Emily," Gill told him honestly. "We've already put so much into it- I'm just worried we're going to trip up, or Lucy will have to go through another round of bullying for not having real parents and I'm scared. Cal. I'm scared of being home alone with my daughter-"

"Gillian, what happened was not your fault-" Cal tried but tears were already rolling down Gill's cheeks.

"But it doesn't change the fact it happened and I couldn't protect her. You would've protected her."

"You don't know that. You did your best, just like I would have. Sometimes it's not enough," Cal told her, wiping her eyes as she continued to cry.

"Cal… I just wish you would've been there."

Her eyes were down with shame. She worried he'd think she was blaming him, but she wasn't and he knew that.

"Stay with me, Gill," Cal told her gently, using his index finger to lift her chin and look at her. "Stay here with me. You and Lucy."

"We are-"

"Not just tonight Gill. I mean move in. There's enough room for all of us. Just move in and-" Suddenly he didn't know where he was going with this. Well he did, but he was afraid to stop talking and face the fact her face was already telling him this was way too early to talk about cohabitation. "And I love you, Gillian. Em loves you and Lucy and, God, I can't imagine my life without you. I can't let you go to a place you don't feel-"

"Cal," she said gently, putting her hand on his face. "Shut up."

Suddenly her lips were on his and he was crashing against the couch with her body on top of his. "Are we going to talk about this?" he asked as Gillian grinded her body against his.

"Of course," she mused against his lips. "I'm saying thank you."

That night, Gillian slept snug against Cal's body, her head on his should and her hand over his heart. She didn't have to worry about not being able to protect herself, she had someone that would go to the ends of the earth to keep her safe. Her, and that little girl sleeping down the hall. This is what a family felt like, what sad is it took Gillian so many years to figure that out.

_**What would you all like to see come from this story? I think a cutsy school play or an art show would be nice for Lucy, but what do you think?**_


	16. Jumpsuit

Lucy sat in the corner, her nose against the cold white tile as warm tears rolled down her face. It wasn't her fault and Miss Becky wouldn't listen. Now she had a note in her backpack from the teacher and while Darcy got to pass the cookies out.

She didn't get recess for two days and she didn't get to sit with the class during story time either.

But she didn't spill the paint. She didn't lie.

More tears ran down Lucy's cheeks in frustration. Darcy and Luke pushed the pour the paint on her and then pushed her down. It wasn't her fault she got it on the rug and on the table.

Miss Becky walked over to Lucy and crossed her arms. "Lucy is Miss Gillian picking you up today?"

"My mommy is," Lucy replied with a nod.

"Your mommy or Miss Gillian?" Miss Becky questioned.

Lucy huffed and stomped her foot. "My mommy is Miss Gillian!"

She honestly didn't mean to shout, and it only caused more tears to pour down her face. "I wanna go home," she cried, resting her forehead against the wall and pulling her hands to her face. "I wanna go home!"

Miss Becky sighed as the final bell rang.

She seized Lucy's hand with a bit more force than necessary and marched her toward the courtyard.

Gillian saw them immediately. It didn't take her long to realize Lucy was sobbing and the teacher looked seriously annoyed.

Lucy jerked out of the woman's grip and went running to Gillian, her sobbing only getting harder. "What happened?" Gillian asked the little girl before glancing at the woman in front of her.

"There is a detailed note in her backpack but Lucy seems to have a problem with listening and lying. Plus she's beginning to develop a real attitude," Miss Maggie told Gillian as Lucy cried and shook her head.

"No, Momma!"

Miss Becky rolled her eyes and exhaled. "If you have any questions, feel free to call me tomorrow."

Gillian had about a hundred questions, but before she could even say goodbye, the woman was marching back toward the door. She would have preferred the woman stand there and explain why her daughter was covered in dry paint and next to hysterical.

Her attention immediately went to her sobbing daughter. "Baby, what happened?"

She was crying too hard to clearly explain, but she tried. "Darcy and-and-and Luke! They poured paint on me!" Lucy cried holding up a plastic baggy that apparently held the ruined clothing. "Then they-they pushed me down and I got paint on the table and ABC carpet. Miss Becky was so mad and I tried to tell her it wasn't me, but she put me in the corner for-forever!"

Lucy wrapped her arms around Gillian's waist again and cried into her stomach. "She said she didn't like liars and I steal food so I'm a liar and I can't go to recess or get snack time!"

Gillian tried to calm Lucy, but she could feel her own blood start to boil. She tried to remain logical, knowing that there could easily be a misunderstanding somewhere that could be smoothed out. At least that's what she tried to tell herself.

Lucy hung to her neck as she carried her to the car. "I- I don't _ever _wanna go back, Mommy."

Part of the maternal instinct Gillian had pumping through her wanted to tell her little girl that she was never going back, another part wanted to demand the teacher explain to her why she called her daughter a liar, but the logical Gillian reminded the mother bear crawling up her throat that Lucy did have to go back to school and approaching a teacher while she was highly emotional was not a good idea.

As she walked into the office, Lucy was still holding onto her neck, but had managed to cry herself to sleep. The entire car ride was filled with sobs and half explanations that were too difficult to comprehend until the sobs died down and her eyes drooped shut.

Cal came sauntering up and fell into step beside Gillian, looking at the little girl's flushed cheeks and face still sticky with tears. "What-"

"Her teacher half dragged her out of the classroom to me. She was already crying, so upset that she could barely tell me _why_ and her teacher didn't even bother to stick around to explain it to me either. Instead she said there's a note in her backpack and _walked away._" Gillian huffed as she reached for the door knob her office, but Cal beat her to it, holding it for her as she entered. Instead of setting Lucy down, Gillian took her seat behind her desk, unwilling to remove herself from the little girl's grasp.

"Did you read the note?" Cal asked earning a surprisingly dirty look from Gillian.

"Oh yes, while I was driving here." He held his hands up in surrender taking into consideration just how furious Gillian was at the moment. She was even more irritated that he wasn't furious right along with her. "You would be marching down there, tearing everyone's head off if it was Emily, Cal, so don't give me that look."

He smirked, even though he knew it was only going to infuriate her more. "Which is why you are the sensible one and I'm the one that you spend most of your free time bailing out of trouble. I like seeing you like this."

Damn him. She could feel herself resisting a smile as he came closer to her, pinning her in my placing both hand on either side of her office chair, allowing it to tip her back just a little so he could more easily lean past Lucy on her chest.

"If you tip us," she warned, but was already closing her eyes and smiling in anticipation.

"You'll what?" he teased, running his hand up her arm and making her smile even more. He paused for effect but didn't wait for her to answer before capturing her lips.

When he pulled away he noticed Gillian looked much less hostile. "Now, are you going to read the letter, or do I get to play the sensible one all day? If so, I need to go change into my boring pants."

Gillian rolled her eyes and smirk at him. "Well, if you keep this up, you may want to wear comfortable pants because I won't be helping you out of them tonight."

He feigned offense before looking around. "So where's this letter?"

She pointed to her purse and he grabbed the envelope that was thrown on top of everything inside. Cal had no grace about ripping the letter open. He sat on the corner of her desk, the paper between his fingers, reading it silently.

When he finished, he flipped the back of the paper over to make sure he wasn't missing anything else, then pursed his lips. "Hmm. Long story short?" Gill nodded. "Lucy got into paint, got it on a ceremonial rug, and a table, talked back-which I may have never heard Lucy do, ever. Most the time it's a challenge to get her to talk."

"Lucy said that two kids got paint on her and pushed her down which is how the carpet and table got dirty," Gillian recalled. Still, she was angry. "Lucy is not a liar. Even when she was stealing food, she was still very honest that she took it. She's a little girl who deserves the benefit of the doubt."

"Then talk to the teacher in the morning," Cal told her easily.

She glared at him. "I really hate that you're calm about this."

Cal just smirked at her. With Emily, he'd come off the handle bars so fast that Gill rarely had a chance to reel him back in before he caused real damage. Watching Gillian turn into a hot head when it came to Lucy made him love her a little bit more. He wasn't pleased either with the way their little girl was treated but Cal knew that one of them had to be the sensible one.

"You never hurt more than when your kid hurts," Gillian muttered the very words her mother used when she was going through her divorce. It was true. Seeing Lucy run out to her, tears rolling down her cheeks, it killed Gillian.

"Can we just go home?" The voice was not Cal's but Lucy's. Her little hands were in fists, holding onto the back of Gillian's silk blouse and Cal had half a mind to joke that real love was not caring that Lucy was wrinkling it.

Gillian hugged the girl to her tighter before looking up at Cal. "Can we go home?" she asked him, knowing after all that they were at work.

He smiled and dramatically motioned to the door. "After you."

Lucy didn't say much when they got home, just found her colors in the same place she had left them. But this time she didn't draw at the desk or at the kitchen table, she crawled underneath her bed and hid there.

Cal could barely stand to watch as Gillian found a comfortable spot against the wall by the bed. There was a pillow against her pack as a poor attempt to keep away a kink that was definitely going to happen later, but she didn't care as long as her little girl felt safe.

"How come you don't want to color out here?" Gillian asked the little girl, completely hidden by the comforter that hung down almost to the floor.

"I don't wanna ever go to school again, Mommy," the little girl replied. "They make my feeling hurt... They call me names and Miss Becky doesn't like me."

"What if I talk to them?" Gillian offered, even though she already planned on doing just that.

"The kids will still won't like me," she replied softly.

"But I love you," Gillian offered with smile trying to pretend that her heart wasn't breaking.

There was the sound of paper rustling as a little head poked out from beneath the bed. "I love you too, Mommy..." Slowly the girl crawled out from her hiding place and into the sanctuary of her mother's arms.

"I know that you can't fix everything, but I really like it that you want to," Lucy told her, head in the crook of Gillian's neck.

The fact that such a young child knew that her mother couldn't move the world, made her heard break into a million pieces.

"I will do everything in my power to fix it."

Late that night, after Lucy was in bed, Cal pulled Gillian into his arms as they sat on his bed. Though Cal had offered his home their home, Lucy had a bedroom that was set up just for her, Gillian still call it their bed. In fact, they still stayed nights at her home, but they just didn't do it without Cal there.

Normally Gillian was always willing to cuddle up to Cal and inhale the scent of his cologne, but right then she was stuck on what Lucy had said.

"Remember, Gill, prison orange is not your color."

She smirked as she turned to him and raised an eyebrow. "You're saying that if I was wearing an orange jumpsuit-"

"I'd bloody rip it off ya," Cal quipped. "But I don't do well with scheduled sexual encounters. 'Conjugal visit' just doesn't hold all that much romance."

Gillian giggled as she turned to him and pressed her lips against his. "You have an odd way of cheering me up."

"Don't think this is for you," he teased. She knew that most of the things he did was for her.

The next morning, Cal watched as Gillian buzzed around her kitchen easily. Lucy was on her hip as Gillian's hair was curled and she was wearing her shoes that cost more than a car payment and her favorite charcoal grey dress. She was dressed to concur the world, but all she was really going to do was tear a kindergarten teacher apart.

Lucy was back to her smiling self, looking at her mother like she was the most amazing thing she had ever seen. Her big blue eyes, staring at her mother's face, holding onto every word her mother had to say. The whole world had stopped for them, Cal decided. The way Gillian looked at that girl... he could watch her watch that little girl all day. He honestly couldn't remember if he felt the same when Zoe looked at Emily.

"Well, we better go so we can have time to take care of things," Gillian said rubbing her nose against Lucy's then turning to Cal to peck his lips. "I'll see you in a couple hours."

"Bail money in hand," he quipped catching her lips again.

Oh how much she loved that man...

Lucy held firm to her mother's hand as they walked through the doors of the elementary school straight to the second kindergarten room. The familiar teacher sat at her desk and Gillian knocked on the door frame.

Mrs. Becky looked up at her and gave her a knowing look. "Ah, Ms. Foster. I assume you're here to talk about yesterday."

"You assumed correctly," Gillian replied coldly, still holding onto Lucy's hand as she walked into the room. "I think yesterday was a misunderstanding and Lucy would happily explain what happened."

Big blue eyes looked at her mother first then her teacher. "Can I please tell you, Miss Becky?" the little girl asked in a very tiny voice. The little girl's palm was sweaty and trembling in her mother's hand.

Miss Becky didn't look impressed but she nodded.

"I didn't spill the paint on purpose... Darcy and Luke pushed me and I fell and... It was an accident...That's what I tried to tell you yesterday."

Miss Becky gave a tight smile that Gillian read straight through. She had absolutely no intention of making things better.

"But you see, Lucy, when little girls lie, it makes it hard to believe them. Remember when you stole the food?" Miss Becky's voice was far too close to menacing for Gillian's temper, but she continued to hold her tongue.

"But I didn't lie. When you asked me if I took it I said yes!" Lucy insisted, now holding onto her mother with both hands and looking at the teacher like she was the monster in a nightmare.

"It still makes it very difficult for me to believe what you tell me," Miss Becky insisted.

Gillian looked down at the little girl who was completely terrified then back at the teacher standing in front of her. If Gillian was a violent person, she would have taken a note from Cal's book and gave her a fairly square punch in the jaw, but this was _Gillian_. Gillian used her words.

"Miss Becky," she began fighting her teeth to come apart from their gritted position, "Lucy already has problems at school. She has been bullied since the day she got here by her students and imagine my surprise when I find out she's also being bullied by _you_." Her blood was completely boiling and her blood pressure was raising. She could literally feel her neck turning red. "I explained to you, very clearly, that Lucy may struggle, but you _insisted_ that you would be up to the challenge. Yet _ .are._"

The young woman was beginning to squirm under Gillian's heated gaze as Lucy watched her mother with extreme interest, curious as to what was going to happen.

"Blatantly calling a five year old a liar is never a smart idea, especially not in front of her mother. _And I am her mother. _Even if it isn't completely legal yet, not a person in this world has a right to _correct _her when she refers to me as Mommy. _Do you understand me?_" Gillian snapped her lips pursed together.

Miss Becky straightened up and took a deep breath, obviously thinking she could reason with the angry-no-thoroughly pissed off mother standing in front of her. "Ms. Foster-"

Gillian held up her hand. "You can apologize to my daughter, but I will be writing the school board and be making a personal phone call to a good friend of mine, David Gentry, the head of school board and the superintendent's brother."

There was a smug feeling of success that made Gillian smile as fear registered in the woman's eyes.

"Ms. Foster, _Gillian,_ I'm sure we can work this out," Miss Becky insisted.

"I'm sure you can with the school board, but I think this conversation is over," Gillian replied pulling Lucy into her arms and heading toward the door, stopping for only a moment. "And Miss Becky, it's _Doctor_ Foster to you."

Gillian held her head high, flaunting her pride as she had just shoved that despicable woman back where she belonged as her daughter pumped a fist in the air. "High five, Mommy! That was great!"

There was no containing her laughter as she met the girls open hand with her own. "What do you say we go talk to the principal about putting you in another class? A new teacher."

As Gillian walked into the office, Cal noticed she was completely incapable of hiding her smile. She tried, but let's face it. When Gillian Foster had something to smile about, nothing was going to stop her.

"Oi!" he called to her as she passed his office, barely having time to hook her arm on the door frame and swing herself in. "What's up with the grin, Cheshire?"

She just raised her eyebrows and continued grinning before bolting from the doorway straight into his arms. "Today, I became a mother bear and completely bumbled the woman that made my cub cry."

Cal smiled back at her as she slid her arms around his neck and continued her beaming smile. "And?"

"And I didn't end up in an orange jumpsuit."

_**So... I really hope you enjoyed this chapter. I've had some serious writers block going on with a whole lot of stuff and I'm doing my absolute best to work through it. You know what really helped? You're encouraging reviews! If you guys want to leave me ideas, I'll happily consider them! Even if you don't have any ideas, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this chapter! **_


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